For a moment, it was as if the intervening years had never happened. A fonctionnaire glaring at me, hitting the panic button, and barely hiding his scorn as I rub my bashed head and try to untangle my legs. The hubris of feeling I'd conquered La Plagne was punctured, and I was back where I started, defeated by a chair lift.
Revisiting this resort in the French Alps where I'd first learnt to ski, the whole geography changed in my mind. The former daily struggle to even reach the learner area was barely comprehensible now, although I could just remember sidestepping wearily up the barely perceptible incline at the bottom of the pistes in Plagne Centre, like a newly hatched turtle making for the sea across unfamiliar sands, or a baby hedgehog on the motorway.
Six years on, I'm an intermediate skier, never destined to be fast, graceful or adventurous, but just about competent and confident enough to make it down every marked piste here, albeit tentatively on the blacks. This time, Jenny from the Oxygene ski school - a veteran of speed skiing competitions - encourages us to go faster down the swooping red runs, tracked by a satnav that measures our pace and plots our progress.
La Plagne is paradoxical: it's widely recommended for novice and intermediate skiers, yet its nursery slopes are some of the most unprepossessing and busiest I've seen. If you make it to the point where you can enjoy a blue run, there are plenty to try. But for the absolute beginner, the first two or three days are likely to be spent around the tragically unpicturesque Plagne Centre.
From here, the valley is hidden behind urban-style apartment buildings; the green run follows an underpass straight through one block. Alarmingly, it's also the home run for any skiers staying further down the mountain, who whizz past at speeds to discomfit a beginner. Learners must also contend with skiers keeping up enough pace or poling themselves along to reach lifts in all directions in the surrounding area. This all felt normal to me as a learner; but I later realised that once you're up a hill, it's pretty remarkable to confront a skier coming at you in the other direction.
This isn't said merely to carp: the frenetic Plagne Centre is never going to make an alluring brochure shot like the Zermatts of this world (as this picture shows). It's more to point out that anyone scratching around for a short few days in the nursery area might never guess at the fresh snow and wide open spaces a lift ride away, or realise quite how beautiful other parts of the resort are: the peaks that offer a view of les Dents du Midi ominous under a cloud, or Mont Blanc in the sunrise, or the whole amazing panorama from the Bellecote glacier.
Once you've established that the aesthetics are there, you can appreciate the practicalities of La Plagne. If your primary purpose is to ski, the convenience of the purpose built centre is entirely welcome. It feels properly French rather than an English enclave, it's unpretentious, and has an enormous ski area (even without the access to the Paradiski area this season after the temporary closure of the Vanoise Express).
The ideal perhaps, is to follow in the spirit of Alain Delon, who reputedly bought a penthouse in the Tour Montparnasse as the one place in Paris where he wouldn't be able to see the new monolith. This is a similar virtue of Summit View, the new set of chalets created by Snowline from what once was a block of timeshare apartments in Plagne Centre. They're also extremely comfortable and cosy, with mod cons of the plasma screen and gorgeous duvet variety, but also the log fire and wooden furniture that feel suitably Alpine. Two fellow guests were first time skiers – ideally situated in this chalet to avoid lugging skis and boots around and simply walk straight downstairs to the novice area outside and return without a struggle. (Perhaps, a little too easily – I found out that both had knocked off early each day, lured back by the warmth and excellent food).
The chalet's balcony was also the prime spot for watching the world go by: skiers arriving back down the mountain, and right in front, the day one skiers bewildered in the very spot I once started.
And it also looked directly up the cable car route to the 2500m Grande Rochette peak. I could gaze up pistes which once seemed of a staggering altitude and steepness that I could previously never imagine skiing. They still look big, beautiful, and even better from the top.
Getting there
Gwyn Topham travelled with Snowline (0844 557 3118; snowline.co.uk) who offer seven nights in the Lucerne Suite, Summit View, La Plagne (sleeps 12) from £499 per person including flights and transfers on a catered basis.
A La Plagne adult lift pass costs £150 for six days.
British Airways flies daily from Heathrow to Geneva and from Gatwick. To book visit British Airways or call on 0870 8509850.
