Kim Kardashian-West has celebrated her 35th birthday by sharing 35 lesson's she's learned, one for every birthday she’s celebrated.
The reality TV star turned business mogul, who is married to Kanye West, has become a pop culture fixture since her early days working as Paris Hilton’s stylist, so must have gathered some useful pearls of wisdom on her way up to the top.
Sadly, though, her advice is the usual sort of thing you’d expect from a celebrity: a bit useless.
But among the vaguely inspiring bon mots (“Health is an invaluable gift”) some of the things she’s learned are slightly more bizarre.
Here’s our look at the weirder advice Kim Kardashian-West is imparting on her 35th birthday.
“All-white outfits always work”
Fashion advice from a Vogue cover star is always worth tucking away in case of an emergency. But all-white is going to be far from practical when eating, sweating, visiting B&Q or holding a newspaper. These are all things Kim may not get round to doing day-to-day.
“When in doubt: wear black”
That’s better, although it could border on goth-y.
“Take photos of everything”
Perfect if you’re the sort of person who can get a book deal that's full of pictures of yourself. But there’s a reason sunsets, avocado on toast and puppies get liked on Instagram: they’re popular. Will documenting the queue in the post office provoke the same response? Probably not.
“Airplane bathrooms have great lighting for selfies.”
Nothing says ‘opportunity for a selfie’ like squeezing into a toilet during a long-haul flight with half an EasyJet chicken korma spilled down your t-shirt.
“A perfectly centered part takes time, but it's worth it.”
This applies less to men, who could err dangerously close to ‘boyband in the 90s’ territory with this advice.
“Know your angles”
It’s unclear whether Kim is referring to the angles of her body - curves, etc - or if she’s referring to a long-held love of trigonometry, but the latter is the more obvious.
So wherever you go in life, remember: the hypotenuse is always the longest side of a right-angle triangle, and try to have SOH-CAH-TOA written down somewhere. Know your angles!
