The funniest standup I’ve ever seen …
The first time I went to LA we somehow got VIP tickets to Def Comedy Jam. We were sat between a couple of gangsta rappers, Russell Simmons and Basketball Wives. A comedian called Chaunté Wayans did 20 minutes, and even the gang members were crying with laughter.
The funniest TV show I’ve ever seen …
Shooting Stars. Without a doubt.
The funniest film I’ve ever seen …
I’d always thought the idea of “crying with laughter” was made up. This is until I watched Good Burger. Nothing like it.
The funniest person I know …
Every single word Tash or Jamie [Demetriou] says is hilarious. I’m jealous I didn’t grow up in the Demetriou household. I actually think it’s unfair.
The funniest heckle I’ve ever had …
When I started out I was doing Theatre in Education. One morning as we were setting up, a kid came out of a classroom, stopped to look at us and shouted: “THIS IS SHIT!” To be fair to him, it was, but there is no way he could’ve known that because all we’d done was put the chairs out.
The funniest item of clothing I’ve ever owned …
Imagine this: a waistcoat, but cotton, like tracksuit material. Also it’s got a zip instead of buttons. On top of that, it has a collar like a blazer. Are you getting this?
The funniest meal I’ve ever eaten …
A girl I was dating took me back to her uni halls and said she’d “make us some food”. A plate of noodles and Wotsits.
The funniest hairstyle I’ve ever had …
I was recently looking back at pictures from when I was younger and I came across some of me aged about seven. I had a mini-afro, short back and sides with a rat’s tail. I remember that all Caribbean boys that age had it but why? I need to question my mum right now.
The funniest thing that shouldn’t be funny …
Anyone under 10 swearing. The younger the funnier.
The funniest word …
I remember someone tweeting that their nose got “squozen” by a kid and that is part of my vocabulary now.
The funniest joke I’ve ever heard …
Man walks into a bar with a giraffe and orders a drink. He downs the drink, shoots the giraffe and turns to walk out. The bartender says: “You can’t leave that lying there.” The man says: “It’s not a lion, it’s a giraffe.” That probably doesn’t work written down.
Kiell Smith-Bynoe stars in Ghosts, Mon, 8.30pm, BBC One and iPlayer; String vs Spitta runs 29 November to 11 December at Soho Theatre, W1
