Which of us has the energy to explore the various theories as to what prompted the latest Kate Moss and Pete Doherty "love split"?
But once again, the locks on the supermodel's north London house have been changed, and the Babyshambles singer's personal possessions have made their well-worn journey along the pavement into a removal van.
This week, for variety's sake, let us view the endless tragedy from the perspective of two bit-part players, in the form of the removal men pictured right. Think of them as the Rosencrantz and Guildenstern of the Moss-Doherty drama, caught up in epic events beyond their control, perhaps lumbering to the van and asking each other: "Who are we, that so much should converge on our little truck?"
While we all ponder that question, do note that the foremost of our reluctant plot devices is carrying one of Pete's blood paintings, competitively priced at around £45,000. Can you guess what it is yet? Yes, quite right. It is utter crap.
Those wishing to see reproductions of the same should fork out £20 for The Books of Albion: The Collected Writings of Peter Doherty, a work recently serialised in the Times, and to which the paper referred as "the deregulation of the senses so elegantly reproduced". Lost in Showbiz looks forward to the day when their emperor Rupert Murdoch parades entirely naked through their Wapping headquarters, only for his staff to marvel at the wondrous suit he informs them he's wearing.
As for Kate and Pete, I think we all know that the rest is unlikely to be silence.
