Don't tell anyone, but you can get amazing miniature versions of this print at local newsagents for less than 1% of the price. A first-class product, but you'll have to track down a tiny frame without our help.
By The Art Group
Buy online at ACHICA.com Photograph: PR
Just what every staunch royalist needs in their handbag, a powder compact to blot away the embarrassed flush when people mistake you for a supporter of the far right. Comes free with yet another hilarious variation of the Keep Calm and Carry On slogan.
By Jane Iredale
Buy onine at jiproducts.co.uk Photograph: PR
A salad pack featuring a special leaf. Yes. A leaf. 'Named the Diamond Jubileaf Chard because of its striking diamond-white vein', says the press release. Not even salad is safe from the unstoppable Jubilee bandwagon.
By Steve's Leaves
For stockist information visit stevesleaves.co.uk Photograph: PR
Because it's only polite when HRH sneezes.
By Doris and Co
Buy online at dorisandco.co.uk Photograph: PR
The perfect expensive kitchen accessory to mop up little accidents.
By House of Holland
Buy online at shop.houseofholland.co.uk Photograph: PR
OK, pass the sick bag, will you?
Limited edition by B&Q
Buy online at diy.com Photograph: PR
These bellows fuel fires by blowing hot air - much like a certain prince we shall not be naming for fear of legal action. The bellows feature a specially designed tartan in honour of the Jubilee. Well, it makes a change from the ubiquitous red, white and blue.
By Devlin Jones
Buy online at gloriouslybritish.co.uk Photograph: PR
Speaking of which, this hanging basket will 'add a splash of patriotic colour to the front of your house or garden,' according to the press release. For those too genteel to hoist a flag. Also relevant on Russia Day, Bastille Day, and any number of national holidays of the many, many countries with flags featuring red, white and blue.
By B&Q
Buy online from diy.com Photograph: PR
Not just reserved for corgis, this dog collar is an expensive way to show love for your sovereign AND your majestic mutt.
By Holly and Lil
Buy online at hollyandlil.co.uk Photograph: PR
This does refer to the Queen, right?
By DP London
Buy online at dorothyperkins.com Photograph: PR
Although these cherry-scented wipes are intended for your hands and face, we hereby give you permission to wipe your bottom with them.
Buy online at uk.accessorize.com Photograph: PR
An ironic reference to Britain's tiny homes AND a celebration of our palace-dwelling monarch's glorious reign!
Buy online at turtlemat.co.uk Photograph: PR
Inexplicably, this tasteful cushion has been reduced from £69. Even more inexplicably, it's nearly sold out.
By Goodwin & Goodwin
Buy online at dwell.co.uk Photograph: PR
And finally, a couple of keepers. There's just something funny about the idea of Her Maj scooping into a tub of Neopolitan.
Buy online at joythestore.com Photograph: PR
Another one we'd love to hate but just can't, there's something deeply attractive about this jelly mould. Perhaps it's because a wobbly jelly version of the Queen is a bit like your very own Madame Tussauds wax work. And you can eat it.
By Lydia Leith
Buy online at lydialeith.bigcartel.com Photograph: Lydia Leith
