PITTSBURGH _ Flowery prose could never capture the essence of the Chicago Bears. Two-word uppercuts _ Soldier Field, Doug Plank, Bronco Nagurski _ have a much better chance, and sometimes even they are a word too long.
So if you're talkin Bears history, feel free to forego full sentences. Just blurt out names and references. "Monsters of the Midway" is about as long as you'll need to go.
Mostly stick with these ...
Ditka.
Butkus.
Singletary.
'85 Bears.
46 Defense.
Gale Sayers.
Da Bears (soft 's').
Sweetness.
Urlacher.
Red Grange.
Sid Luckman.
George Halas ("Papa Bear").
How can you not appreciate this franchise, even when the current incarnation stinks, having lost 19 of its past 23 games as it readies for the Steelers? Maybe especially when the current incarnation stinks. The Bears can be most lovable when losing, and things are so bad at the moment that the following headline actually appeared on a reputable website (csnchicago.com):
"Can Markus Wheaton fix what ails the Bears' offense?"
I've never been a big Bears guy, per se, but they are inarguably an iconic franchise. They were the NFL's first team, along with the Chicago (now Arizona) Cardinals, and they own the most wins and Hall of Famers (though not the most Super Bowl rings, as we know).
And what a following.
I learned long ago to respect a Bears fan's obsessive passion, famously chronicled in those old "Saturday Night Live" skits. I also found this team repeatedly appearing at formative times of my life (you could say they are u-Bear-quitous, but I certainly won't).
Is this true for others?
One of my first favorite sports books was Gale Sayers' "I Am Third."
My first guy-cry flick was "Brian's Song," the heart-wrenching story of Sayers and fellow Bears running back Brian Piccolo.
"Great movie," said Steelers safety Mike Mitchell.
My first sports column, for "Generation Magazine" at the University of Buffalo, was a preview of the Bears-Patriots Super Bowl (I picked the Patriots on the off chance I would look like a genius).
My first best friend for some odd reason was a rabid Bears fan. We grew up in Buffalo, N.Y., but Tom Cusimano worshipped at the Church of Butkus.
"And once they drafted Walter Payton," he told me the other day, "they were mine forever."
It seems the Bears are on every team's all-time highlight reel, too, for good and bad reasons. Despite a scant history between the Steelers and Bears, for example, one cannot speak of modern-day Steelers football without mention of Jerome Bettis steamrolling Brian Urlacher in the wonderfully muddy snow globe that was Heinz Field.
That photo wouldn't look out of place at the doors of the Hall of Fame.
Dick Butkus wouldn't look out of place as the all-time face of the NFL.
But back to Payton. Because while Tom Cusimano fell in love with players only veteran Chicago die-hards could remember _ Roland Harper, Wally Chambers, Doug Buffone _ the late, great Payton was his guy, and Payton resonates even with current NFL players.
"Sweetness" ran with uncommon spirit.
What springs to mind at the mention of his name?
"One of the greatest of all time. I was actually thinking about that _ Soldier Field, Chicago, the history," said Steelers running back James Conner. "So yeah, when I think of Chicago, that's the first thing that comes to mind _ a running back who had it all."
Le'Veon Bell can relate. His name first came up with Payton's in 2014 when Bell posted three consecutive games of at least 200 all-purpose yards. Nobody had done that since Payton in '77 (none before that, either).
"I obviously know he's one of the greatest runners to ever play the game," Bell said Thursday. "So to even be compared and mentioned with him is an honor."
A few stalls down, cornerback Joe Haden chimed in.
"Oh yeah, I'm a real big Walter Payton fan," he said. "Just the running style. Love watching his highlights."
Look at all the Bears-themed awards out there. You have the Walter Payton Man of the Year award (for off-field works and on-field excellence), the Bronco Nagurski Trophy (college football's top defensive player; Tyler Matakevich won it two years ago) and the Butkus Award (top high school, college and NFL linebackers).
And if you had an award for the worst television series of all-time, Butkus might have won for ESPN's "Bound For Glory," which chronicled him as "coach" of the Montour Spartans. Here's hoping you never saw it.
Let me finish with the late Patrick Young, my parents' good friend. He was a tall, gregarious man with a booming voice and the heartiest hand shake on earth. A native Chicagoan. A monster Bears fan.
Whenever we'd cross paths, we would talk football. I didn't see him for years after I moved to Pittsburgh in 1989, but we connected again when he needed life-saving help here. He had a liver transplant and two kidney transplants in Pittsburgh. He suffered a lot in his later years.
My lasting memory of Patrick came days after his liver transplant in December 1994. I walked down from my apartment in Shadyside, as I recall, on New Year's Day, and we sat together in his room at UPMC Presbyterian Hospital, watching his Bears (Dave Wannstedt's Bears at the time) spring a huge playoff upset at Minnesota, 35-18.
I'd never seen him so happy.
