Everybody's giving out about the partying students now – but just wait until all the vaccinated pensioners start cutting wild and tearing up the country.
As the only age group with a “Green Badge” vaccine pass to get into pubs and clubs, we’ll soon be hearing about “Grey Raves” and mad house parties with 75-year-olds pulling brandy and ginger ale-fuelled all-nighters.
And just wait until they work out how to use Tinder – with the auld Viagra just after coming off prescription-only, granddad will be having the kind of wild lockdown social life the teens can only dream of.
This could be the summer that the Bus Pass Posse turn the normally calm caravan sites of Bundoran and Brittas Bay into Magaluf with comfy chairs.
There’ll be mobility-scooters pulling handbrake turns on the bypasses, every pub will have Nationwide on 24/7 on the big screen and the showbands will be out of retirement and back in the charts.
Electric Picnic will be able to go ahead this year, but with only the over-65s vaccinated it’ll be headlined by Dickie Rock and Twink with that new kid Johnny Logan on the Up And Coming stage.
Of course, at the rate the vaccination rollout is going, maybe we all misunderstood the Government’s plan and what they are actually doing is waiting for EVERYBODY to reach 75 before they can get the jab.
You’ll ring up your GP about the vaccine: “Well, you’re, what, 45 next month? You’re in luck, I can fit you in for the vaccine at 10 in the morning of August 23rd... 2042.”
At the rate this zero-craic, endless lockdown is going, it’s not the Covid that’s going to kill us – but the boredom.
