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The Guardian - US
The Guardian - US
Guardian staff

Jimmy Kimmel on CPAC: ‘A who’s who of who won’t accept the results of the election’

Jimmy Kimmel on stage
Jimmy Kimmel on CPAC: ‘Remember in Ghostbusters when all the slime was running into one building?’ Photograph: YouTube

While other late-night host remained on holiday, Jimmy Kimmel talked weird CPAC sessions, Lara Trump’s bedtime routine and Donald Trump criticizing his ratings.

Jimmy Kimmel

Jimmy Kimmel recapped the Conservative Political Action Conference, also known as CPAC, which is “a meeting of the rightwing nuttiest Republicans in the country”, as he explained on Thursday evening. “Remember in Ghostbusters when all the slime was running into one building? Basically that.

“It’s a who’s who of who won’t accept the results of the election,” he continued. “And the speakers? Every year, your standard collection of Roger Stones and Sloppy Steves and flat-earthers and whatnot, with a few foreign dictators and sexual predators sprinkled in.”

Among the keynote speakers was Trump’s daughter-in-law Lara Trump, who’s running for chairperson of the Republican National Committee. In her address, Lara said: “I want my son to be proud of who he is. I want him to know that it’s OK to be a patriot. It’s OK to love God, and it’s OK to grow up into a strong, masculine man.”

“That’s right, strong, masculine man – just like Daddy is,” Kimmel deadpanned over a picture of her husband, Eric Trump.

Lara Trump also emphasized how she encouraged her children to say their prayers and the pledge of allegiance every night before bed. “What sweet memory for their children to share with their therapist years from now,” Kimmel laughed. “It sounds like something that would give you away as a foreign agent – ‘then we do prayed and pledge good allegiance to American flag.’”

The conference in Washington DC was not just a chance “for people in red, white and blue tracksuits to see their favorite con artists in person”, Kimmel added, “it’s also a chance to learn at seminars run by the best in the business”, such former EPA administrator Andrew Wheeler, who led a session titled “Putting Our Heads in the Gas Stove”.

“That’s a real title of a session,” Kimmel marveled. “People signed up to see that.”

In other Republican news, the party’s presidential frontrunner, Donald Trump, took aim at Kimmel personally on Truth Social. In response to an Los Angeles Times interview in which Kimmel pondered letting his contract expire in 2026, Trump posted: “They could get a far more talented person, who would also get better Ratings, for 5% of what they are paying this Loser!”

“I’ve got to say, that’s a helluva way to find out you’re not going to be somebody’s running mate,” Kimmel joked. “He has no idea how delighted I am by something like this. I’m going to try to enjoy it, because he probably won’t be able to do this when they take away his phone in prison. So I’m gonna really soak it in.”

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