In 2016, JD Vance dubbed Trump potentially “America’s Hitler”. Later that year, he said Trump was “cultural heroin”, said “I find him reprehensible”. He went on to dub Trump “a moral disaster”, an “idiot”, and a “total fraud”.
Cut to 2025, and it’s safe to say Vance is playing a very different tune. In comments to Fox News last night, Vance commented on Gavin Newsom getting under Trump’s skin by imitating his style on social media:
Vance: This idea that Gavin Newsom is somehow going to mimic Donald Trump's style—That ignores the fundamental genius of President Trump's political success that he is authentic.. Don't be a crazy person. Be authentic pic.twitter.com/PH79tOQfTd
— Acyn (@Acyn) August 20, 2025
This idea that Gavin Newsom is somehow going to mimic Donald Trump’s style. That ignores the fundamental genius of President Trump’s political success that he is authentic.. Don’t be a crazy person. Be authentic.”
Gee buddy, what changed? It’s a pretty leap to go from calling a guy “America’s Hitler” to talking about his “fundamental genius”. Then again, we really shouldn’t be surprised. From the moment it became apparent that Vance had even a chance of gaining power through Trump, he’s had his nose buried so deep in the presidential buttcrack it’s a miracle he hasn’t suffocated.
Eyes on the prize
Having to constantly sing the praises of – and play second fiddle to – a man you clearly dislike must wear on the soul. We have to hope Vance wakes up each morning, stares into the bathroom mirror, and miserably reminds himself that this is all worth the cost of his dignity.
And maybe it is! Vance knows, just as we do, that Trump is an overweight 79-year-old man who hates exercise, is on a cheeseburger-based diet, and has recently had a string of health problems (to say nothing of his disintegrating brain. If he maintains his Smithers-like toadyism and Trump kicks the bucket, Vance will assume the presidency.
Plus, as much as we hate to admit it, Vance kind of has a point. For all his many other flaws, Trump is at least authentic to himself at all times. The problem is that Trump’s “authentic self” is a deluded, egotistical monster with a waning grasp on reality and a terrifying aptitude for petty cruelty and sadism. And that’s the man with his finger on the nuclear button.
Perhaps the only thing scarier than that is that if Trump dies in office, Vance will instantly become one of the most powerful men in the world.
