Jamie Laing has revealed he had a secret battle with bulimia and how his wife Sophie Habboo helped him.
The former Made In Chelsea star, 36, explained that he developed an eating disorder in his late teens and “suffered in silence” for years because of the “shame” he felt.
Laing said Habboo - who is pregnant with their first child - caught him being sick and supported him in his recovery, serving as a “big wake-up call” for him.
The BBC Radio 1 host has decided to speak publicly about his eating disorder because he was inspired by Jack Whitehall and Freddie Flintoff’s own experiences and wants men to be able to discuss their struggles more openly.
Laing opened up about his eating disorder for the first time while appearing on Fearne Cotton’s Happy Place podcast.
“My story is that I played a lot of sport, very sporty, always quite lean. And I used to eat a lot of food because I was trying to put on weight for rugby,” he explained.
Laing went on: “And when I had my knee injury and sport was taken away from me, I must've gone into some sort of anxiety without realising it. And I got comfort in eating.”
The reality star said the turning point came on holiday, recalling: “It was back when you didn't really have camera phones, so I had a disposable camera and I went on holiday.
“I was taking photos and my mum would say to me, ‘You look a bit stocky. You're eating a lot and you look a bit stocky.’ And it was from a place of love, but I was like. ‘whatever’.
“And I remember getting the photos developed and I came across a picture of me topless on the beach and I did look stocky. I didn't look lean, I didn't look as six-packy as I usually did. And immediately I just felt shame.”
He went on: “That day something clicked in my brain, I must've been 18 or 19, and I started to diet. I was conscious of what I was eating, so Coca-Cola became Diet Coke, hummus became reduced fat, I would eat rice cakes instead of crisps and I started dieting.
“And I started becoming thinner. I became so conscious of my weight, which I'd never done before.”
Laing explained that his battle worsened when he joined Made In Chelsea in 2011 aged 23 as he found that food was the only thing he could “control”.
“I then joined Made In Chelsea and everything was edited for me, I had no control of my life, I was conscious about the way that I looked because people were writing stuff on social media, that I then had to control something - so that became in part, what I was eating,” he recounted.
“I've spoken to people who have had eating disorders and it's hard for me to say, but I had an eating disorder for sure. And I've never said that out loud.
“There were moments in my 20s where I wouldn't keep my food down, because it was just a complete control thing. And it was a secret I had.”
The TV personality - who has been open about his battle with anxiety in the past - explained that he felt unable to talk to any of his male friends about his bulimia due to the perception that eating disorders weren’t something men could have.
Recalling how Habboo helped him, he said: “Sophie caught me once and this secret that I had, was suddenly not a secret anymore and suddenly I realised what was going on.
“She said to me, ‘What are you doing?’ and I said, ‘I was doing nothing,’ and she said: ‘Yes, you were. I heard you being sick.’
“She said, ‘It's okay, I just want you to know that whatever you're dealing with, I'm sorry. And if you ever want talk about it, I'm here.’
“And I suddenly clicked onto what was happening. It was like it was an out-of-body experience and then suddenly became a realistic thing that I was doing.”
Laing continued: “When Sophie said that to me, that's when I woke up and I was like, ‘Oh my God, what the hell? Why am I even doing this? Why am I injuring myself?’ It was a big wake-up call.”
He watched Flintoff's documentary, Living With Bulimia, in which comedian Whitehall revealed he battled bulimia when he started out in TV and had been inspired to speak out by Flintoff’s candour about his eating disorder.
Laing said the show made him realise how important speaking about his experience could be for other men, explaining: “Women are amazing with the way they talk about body positivity, but with guys we never talk about it.
“To be sexy and attractive, we have to go to the gym and do press-ups and have abs and be able to lift 100kg and not everyone can do that. And in my experience, we suffer in silence because it's so shameful.
“You don't talk to your guy friends about it, no freaking way, are you kidding me? Not in a million years. I could maybe talk to my mum about it, I could maybe talk to my sister about it. But I couldn't talk to guys about it.
“For whatever reason, I can talk about my anxiety, I can talk about anything, but that for me... It's a very shameful thing, for some reason I find it really shameful.
“I even went to a therapist and when I told the therapist what was happening, I had to cover my eyes and say it because I was so embarrassed about it.”
He went on: “Talking from a guy point of view, I think we're very good at finding excuses and guys are good at playing dumb - in their relationships, to their friends, to themselves, saying it doesn't matter.
“In my experience, as guys we don't open that door to talk about loneliness, or anxiety, or weight or our fear of failure. So my book was to open those doors for everyone to have that conversation.”
Laing said he was inspired to talk about his eating disorder in his new book, Boys Don’t Cry, to set an example for his unborn child.
“That's why I wrote it for my future kid, because I want my baby to understand they can talk about things,” he said.
