TOTTENHAM COURT JESTER
The nights are drawing in and people are already being bombarded with Christmas adverts. Mince pies have been available in your local reputable supermarkets since August, parents are debating which colourful piece of plastic is most likely to entertain their child for 17 minutes on the Big Day, and Football Daily has already been thinking which colourful piece of Tin will provide the ammunition for entertainment this year at Guardian Towers.
For those casting directors wondering where they are going to find their next star for the pantomime season – Peter Beardsley and Yeovil and Scunthorpe legend Ian Botham have all made the not-so-trodden path from the pitch to the boards – please consider James Maddison, who is all-too-happy to play the part of villain alongside his distinguished roles as creative midfielder for Tottenham and “main man” at his family’s roast dinners.
“I like that pantomime villain-type vibe that’s created often at away games, especially because of the type of player I am and even the type of person I am sometimes, I don’t mind getting a bit of stick,” Maddison chuckled to TalkSport. “Sometimes it comes with the character I have but I don’t mind that.”
Humour is not something that Football Daily is very familiar with, but who can forget this slapstick classic of Maddison not drinking properly out of a water bottle, in an apparent reference to Maddison not drinking out of water bottle a couple of days earlier!? Oh! James!
PC Tony Stamp nor Ian Beale simply cannot compete with the Spurs No 10, who lines up for the visit of Fulham on Monday. We could even see a repeat of the Madders corner skit last seen at Luton. He’s going to take it from outside of the designated quadrant! Oh no he isn’t! Good, because then the laws of the game wouldn’t have been properly enforced.
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QUOTE OF THE DAY
Monday 16 October
New Monza signing Papu Gómez taunts José Mourinho before his side’s clash with Roma on Sunday: “Mourinho? I only have one memory of him and that is winning the Europa League with Sevilla against him a few months ago.”
Friday 20 October
Gómez is banned for two years on Friday in a doping case stemming from his time at the La Liga club Sevilla. He tested positive last October, shortly before joining the Argentina squad that went on to win the World Cup.
Sunday 22 October
Gómez confirms he has asked his lawyers to look into his doping suspension and said that the banned substance came from his son’s cough medicine: “I accidentally ingested it in a spoonful of my little son’s cough syrup … I have asked my lawyers to look into the matter as I believe the disciplinary case was not treated according to the rules.”
Mourinho, after Roma scored a 90th-minute winner against Monza: “I have a cough, but I won’t take that syrup. I don’t remember playing against him in the Europa League final [Gómez was an unused substitute]. What happened to him isn’t my problem.”
FOOTBALL DAILY LETTERS
“The Sheffield United v Manchester United game was dedicated post-match by the victorious manager to the memory of Sir Bobby Charlton. At the final whistle the cameras by the technical areas caught Paul Heckingbottom walking towards Ten Hag to shake hands but his opposite number had immediately turned to the United support staff behind him to begin the now traditional process of high-fiving everyone in sight – no doubt including the person responsible for checking the tyre pressures on the club jet – and ignored the Blades boss. As a 67-year-old football fan I suggest Sir Bobby would have treated the beaten manager with a great deal more respect and that the best way to have honoured his passing would have been to do the same” – Graham Price.
“Re Ralph Culver’s thoughts on Aaron Ramsdale [Friday’s Football Daily], it’s probably just as well that David Raya’s understudy wasn’t at Stamford Bridge on Saturday, otherwise his stapled-on smile may have accidentally transformed into a full-on, David-Seaman-esque belly laugh at a couple of points” – Jim Hearson.
“The first letter of the first five teams in the premier league tonight spells MALTA. I wonder is that the longest word that’s ever been spelled in such a manner?” – Chris Francis [Wrong inbox, although we’ll let the Knowledge know – Football Daily Ed].
Send your letters to the.boss@theguardian.com. Today’s winner of our prizeless letter o’ the day is … Jim Hearson.
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