Former Strictly Come Dancing star James Jordan has revealed he suffered from anxiety attacks after his dad Allan Jordan died.
The 43-year-old professional dancer was left heartbroken after losing his "best mate" in March, after he had suffered from a stage-four brain tumour.
With today being Jordan's first Father's Day since his loss, the grieving star has opened up about finding it difficult to cope, and how his dad's sudden passing took a toll on his body and his mental health, during a time when he and wife Orla were adapting to parenthood.
James told The Sun : "My dad was my best mate, and I had never realised how powerful grief is. I didn't realise what it would do to me, and what it would do to my body."
Before his dad passed, James and his wife Orla welcomed their first child - a daughter called Ella - together via IVF, after struggling to conceive naturally.
"I wanted to have the joy and elation over having a baby, but with my dad, it meant that it was probably the darkest, and most horrible time of my life," the choreographer continued.
He revealed he was "going down a dark path", but his wife Orla "smacked me out of it".
James said: "I felt very weak, my eyesight was affected, I was waking up in the middle of the night thinking someone had broken into our house, I had a snooker cue by the bed, I was suffering with anxiety massively."
The doting dad added that his little one was his "medicine" and "made the whole thing easier" coming home from his poorly dad to see Ella.
James shared how Father's Day holds a special place in his heart as he gets to spend time with Ella, although he concluded: "I am still upset because I am not with my dad."
Former Strictly professionals James and Orla announced on February 29 last year that they had welcomed their daughter.
The blonde beauty told Hello! at the time: "It's been amazing and overwhelming at the same time. We've wanted this for so long.
"We had a lovely life, but this is making us feel so much happier than anything else we have done. Nothing in our careers measures up to this. It feels perfect."
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