The arrival of the new issue of OK! magazine is always bittersweet, signifying as it does that Dame Showbiz's wheel has turned again, and we must familiarise ourselves with new avatars of glamour, while others recede into the twilight. This week, the changing of the guard is glossed by cover star Jade Goody, who is moved to discuss where she's at with her on-off gentleman caller, Jack Tweed.
"We have talked about marriage," Jade informs the publication, "and he has told me how he'd ask me – at the seven wonders of the world."
Given the difficulty of making good on this pledge, what with such marvels as the Hanging Gardens of Babylon and the Colossus of Rhodes being somewhat off the beaten track these days, this might be a canny piece of tap-dancing on Jack's part.
However, we must continue, as Jade delicately points out the current impediment to their union. "I think it's a bit tacky to think that he'd propose to me in prison," she muses. "He wouldn't do that, though. He's got more class than people think."
Indeed. Jack is currently doing a stretch for beating a 16-year old boy around the head with a golf club, but the minute he's done his time, do expect to see him hauling that debonair cosmopolitan charm to the Pharos at Alexandria, and making an honest woman of Jade forthwith.
