In the absence of any actual legislation to debate on Monday, government senators practised their improv.
Officially, the four-hour filibuster was a reply to the speech made by the governor general, Sir Peter Cosgrove, at the opening of parliament.
However the lengthy monologues – on topics ranging from the splendid number of Australian flags visible in the audience shots of the BBC’s Last Night of the Proms, to the surprisingly deep thinking of the Indigenous affairs minister, Nigel Scullion, to the exact name of the Nationals candidate for the lower-house seat of McEwan – bore little reference to Cosgrove’s remarks.
The filibuster was brought on by the government’s failure to have any legislation ready for debate in the Senate. Two bills listed on the notice paper for debate had not passed the lower house when parliament began at 10am.
It followed an embarrassing episode last sitting week when Labor was able to seize control of the lower house after three government MPs went home early.
"shambles" and "pissup in brewery" can't be far behind https://t.co/sjpzFuZs8F
— Stephen Murray (@smurray38) September 12, 2016
Filibustering is a grand parliamentary tradition that often provides an opportunity to commend the sterling, yet frequently dull, work of a local to whichever electorate the filibusterer happens to represent.
Unfortunately (and rather surprisingly, given the government would have known ahead of time that it had no actual business to put on the notice paper) government senators appeared to have left their stack of briefing notes on local worthy people at home.
"In govt you can get things done," Sinodinos tells an almost empty Senate that's killing time with filibusters because it has nothing to do.
— James Jeffrey (@James_Jeffrey) September 12, 2016
Instead, the Senate was treated to an attempt by the Victorian senator Bridget McKenzie, from the National party, to remember the name of the Nationals candidate for McEwan, James Anderson, or, as McKenzie put it: “In the seat of McEwan we ran … Andrew. Andrew, Andrew … it will come to me.”
“Andrew,” or rather Anderson, McKenzie said, “runs a … stock feeds store, in, ah, in … I’m sorry, madam deputy president, a stock foods store in a place starting with ‘T’.”
The name McKenzie was searching for, Fairfax Media reported, was Tallarook.
McKenzie did recall the name of the Nationals leader in the Senate, Nigel Scullion, at another point in her speech, musing: “He’s a deep thinker. You wouldn’t think it but he actually is.”
Tune into the Senate. It has run out of business and the Coalition is filibustering it's way to lunch. The speeches are priceless.
— Chris Uhlmann (@CUhlmann) September 12, 2016
Also in the box was the Queensland senator James McGrath, of the Liberal National party, who recorded on Hansard his deep affection for the Last Night of the Proms, which he said was “one of my favourite TV programs, every year, a fantastic music spectacle”.
"It was a fantastic spectacle" - @JamesMcGrathLNP filibusters about his favourite tv show 'Last Night At The Proms'. pic.twitter.com/bgHnRqzBZ4
— Alice Workman (@workmanalice) September 12, 2016
He continued at length.
“There was no surprise there, it was a fantastic spectacle,” McGrath said.
“And what was great to see that in this huge mass of people at the Royal Albert Hall, that you could see the Australian flag flying proudly – not just once or twice but numerous times – you could see the Australian flag being hoisted aloft by Australians enjoying the best of, of, of, of the British music that is around.”
It wasn’t until the final minutes of the filibuster that Senator Mitch Fifield arrived at the most obvious topic for filibustering: the filibuster itself. It was, as Buzzfeed’s Mark Di Stefano reported, “meta-padding”.
Fifield is doing an excellent job in padding, by talking about the padding. It’s meta-padding.
— Mark Di Stefano (@MarkDiStef) September 12, 2016
The leader of the Labor party in the Senate, Penny Wong, said senators were asked to filibuster until question time at 2pm because the government had not managed to pass any legislation for the Senate to debate.
Penny Wong asks what's Latin is for , "I came, I did nothing, I stuck around"? Wants to apply to PM Turnbull..
— Malcolm Farr (@farrm51) September 12, 2016
The government managed to pass the registration of deaths abroad amendment bill and the primary industries levies and charges collection amendment bill in the early afternoon with crossbench support.
Fifield, the leader of government business in the Senate, blamed the Labor party’s “games” for the delay in the Senate, tweeting: “Senate is ready. No bill could be less controversial.”
Labor playing games in the House delaying Registration of Deaths Abroad Amendment Bill. Senate is ready. No bill could be less controversial
— Mitch Fifield (@SenatorFifield) September 12, 2016
Wong, who quoted her favourite bits of the various parliamentary monologues in her own address to the Senate, said the debate “really confirms what Labor said in the election – Mr Turnbull and his government have no agenda”.
“They’ve literally got nothing to talk about,” Wong said.
.@SenatorWong attacking the govt for not having legislation to debate in @AuSenate is worth a watch @SBSNews #auspol pic.twitter.com/oBeFePNuJf
— David Sharaz (@DavidSharaz) September 12, 2016
Australian Associated Press contributed to this report.
