If you’re a server in the restaurant industry, you know how stressful it can be: unpredictable guests, running out of orders, and nonstop refills, while balancing the weight of their satisfaction on your shoulders.
One server reveals his three secrets to surviving the restaurant industry. “All right, here are some tips for my servers out there,” TikTok creator Dom Solesky (@soleskywho) tells more than 150,000 viewers.
1. Stop caring
When a server becomes overwhelmed and can’t keep up with their tasks, they are usually “in the weeds” or “weeded out.” How do you deal with it? He advises to stop caring.
“You’re only ‘weeded’ if you care,” he says. “Who cares! You’re gonna be busy whether you care or not. So, may as well not care!”
2. Stop saying ‘ma’am’
Normally, the term ‘ma’am’ is used politely and respectfully to address a female. However, some might find this offensive, where being called that makes them feel old. Of course, CNN states this all varies by the region, such as the South, where ‘ma’am’ is preferred. Nevertheless, Solesky offers an alternative.
“Never use the word ‘ma’am,’” he recommends. “Always call women ‘miss’ no matter the age.”
3. Shift the blame
Then, the content creator always recommends not accepting responsibility.
“It’s never your fault. Make something up and blame it on someone else not getting tipped by this table,” he says.
According to Study Breaks, this is the most common lie servers often tell their guests.
“This table didn’t get their food yet because you forgot to ring it in?” the TikToker says. “No, you didn’t. You rang it in 20 minutes ago but the kitchen staff is all on heroin.”
What did the servers think?
Most of them practiced these on the job.
“No these are actually the 3 things i tell people when they freak out,” one viewer remarked.
“Lived by all of these rules when I was in the industry,” another concurred.
A bartender accepts the blame on their co-workers’ behalf. “As the bartender, yes, you always have my permission to blame me. Save your 20% tip!” they commented.
On the other hand, some disagreed for different reasons.
“This is funny but i disagree with 3, you should always assume full responsibility they respect you more for it then if you just try blaming someone else,” one commenter stated.
“Unfortunately I have to care because they’re the ones that are paying me,” a second remarked.
How to handle stress while working as a server
Since being a server can be challenging, it can easily become overwhelming. In fact, the NIH found that 38.3% of servers battled depression, 52.3% suffered from anxiety, and 34.4% were stressed. With that being said, here are some pointers from Bar & Restaurants News on how to keep your cool during these times:
- Find time for breaks
- Take deep breaths
- Accept responsibility and be gentle with yourself if a mistake occurs
- Ask for help
- Maintain a positive mindset
@soleskywho do your sidework. #fyp #foryou #funny ♬ original sound – solesky
The Mary Sue reached out to Solesky via Instagram direct message and TikTok comment.
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