What sadist designed this? Absolute beginner Tanya Gold is stuck on a lift with ski instructor Lawrence in the Swiss resort of Saas FePhotograph: Jean-Christophe Bott/KeystonePiste off already? Or maybe exhaustion has set in early from the sheer weight of clothingPhotograph: Jean-Christophe Bott/KeystoneIt's all downhill from here. "I begin to slide... "Photograph: Jean-Christophe Bott/Keystone
"... and immediately I am flat on my back, trapped, immobile and howling"Photograph: Jean-Christophe Bott/KeystoneLawrence really struggles to realign Tanya down the fall linePhotograph: Jean-Christophe Bott/Keystone"I can ski! I can ski!"Photograph: Jean-Christophe Bott/Keystone"Oh no, I can't. I'm a dying swan"Photograph: Jean-Christophe Bott/Keystone"Or am I a flaming blue flamingo?"Photograph: Jean-Christophe Bott/Keystone"After two days, I get better and better and fly around listening to Barry White on my iPod"Photograph: Jean-Christophe Bott/Keystone"And then I decide it's more fun pretending to be a flattened penguin. Lawrence has clearly had enough"Photograph: Jean-Christophe Bott/Keystone
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