It took a pair of novice chocolatiers to make these chocolate ears.
But sadly they are the only part of our attempt to build a chocolate Charles that bears any similarity to the real thing.
With the Coronation just around the corner, chocolatiers made a life-size bust of the King. The resemblance is uncanny, so we thought a DIY version couldn’t be that difficult.
Cue a masterclass in how not to make a chocolate bust of Charles III. OK, so it took an expert team of model makers four weeks to study images of the new King and perfect their impressive chocolate carving – to say nothing of their years of experience.
I have just one day, not to mention no baking or crafting talent or experience as a chocolatier. A little panicky, I rope my 16-year-old daughter Daisy in to help.
We come up with the genius plan to drive to Hobbycraft to buy two masks to use as moulds. We also get a ready-made crown, toothpicks and carving utensils, then head to a supermarket to buy a load of chocolate.
Taping up the eyes and nose of one mask so the chocolate can’t seep out, we pour melted chocolate in, planning to use the second mask as the back of the King’s head.
The experts at Mars used 50lb of chocolate for their bust and we underestimated the amount we needed, so it’s back to the shop. Then, disaster strikes. The masking tape starts to break under the pressure of the heated chocolate, which begins to seep on to the table.
We rush the King’s head to the fridge, where we leave him overnight.
Next day, the good news is that King Charles hasn’t suffered a meltdown and has set. Three cheers for the King.
The next task is to make the head-shaped ball of chocolate look like a king.
Peeling off the tape and cardboard mask, the entire back of his head crumbles. But we can salvage this and we still have half a head.
Carving the features isn’t easy. I try to make a nose, ears and eyes out of the remaining chocolate, but my efforts look like blobs. Time for Plan B – chocolate-coloured fondant icing.
It’s much easier to work with than the melted chocolate and we’re able to make patterns on the ears and hair with the toothpicks. Our ball of chocolate is now transforming into something that resembles the King – well, if you step back and squint hard enough, maybe.
Running out of chocolate again, we go back to the shops to buy a cake which we cut in half to make the shoulder base, before sticking mini Twix, Milky Way, Galaxy and Bounty bars on to copy his uniform and medals.
The other sculpture, commissioned by Celebrations, will be on display at Mars Wrigley’s HQ in Slough, Berks…while mine will be on display in my fridge as a reminder of why I’ll never go on Bake Off.
