Article created by: Dominyka
How we perceive the world can be quite subjective. A lot depends on our childhood environments, as well as the people we spend the most time around. They shape our assumptions and values. It’s when we change our environments and enter new social circles that we realize we may have gotten some ideas about the world very wrong.
Redditor u/Piguthew sparked a fascinating discussion on r/AskReddit after they asked everyone to share the traits they were raised to think were very common that reality proved otherwise. Read on to take a look at how these internet users saw the world growing up.
I didn't realize that most people just aren't that bright.
Honestly, being polite. I was raised to be exceedingly polite and I feel really bad if I don't do things like let people pass in traffic or hold doors open or say my 'pleases and thanks yous'. And I like the idea of kindness being its own reward. Makes plus sum happiness in the world.
It really wasn't until I entered adulthood that I really saw how dismissive people were of those concepts. So much 'I got mine' and 'I insist on beating you to that light by 1.5 seconds' in the world. Just common courtesy stuff is a rare sight and that makes me sad.
The need to be on time / respecting start times. I knew my mom and dad were always late, but everyone else was always on time. We were very punctual and my hobbies involved things that required me to be early often. Then I became a young adult out of college, trying to schedule things with friends. OMG. The fact that it's 'okay' to show up to planned things an hour late is just... no. Absolutely not. Showing up to a party late is fine and expected. Do not show up late to things where people are out money if you aren't there on time. Absolutely unacceptable.
Selflessness. I’m not a stingy person. I give close friends & family my time, money, food whatever they need when they need it. Always a phone call away but whenever I needed help, at the lowest point of my life. I was devastated to find out they rarely reciprocated.
I have an over active imagination to the point of being a problem throughout most of my life. It blows my mind when I meet someone who seems to have no imagination at all.
Getting excited when I don't know something or find out I'm wrong because it means I get to learn something new.
Gossiping . I grew up with a mom that gossiped a lot and viciously too . I quickly learned around other women that it’s unacceptable and attracts the wrong people.
Being kind.
That people were generally grown up and ready to face the world when they were 18-20. There might be rough edges or blind spots, but that'll get ironed out with a little bit of experience.
My first week at college quickly disabused me of that notion.
People didn't know leaving food out would cause it to spoil, that pizza boxes rot and attract vermin, didn't know how to do laundry, clean up after themselves, that getting enough sleep was necessary to function properly and letting other people sleep was the courteous and polite thing to do... Basic life skill stuff. The minute mom and dad weren't around to do everything, they had no idea how to do anything. And this is before we even get into emotional intelligence...
And these were people who were admitted to one of the best universities in the country, if not the world.
I thought everyone associated every word, letter, and number with a color. Turns out not everyone does that and I have synesthesia.
That most people don’t worry about everything and anything. It absolutely blew my mind when i realised other people didn’t constant feel fear and worry. i’d lived my entire life, right from childhood, with anxiety without knowing it wasn’t normal. Also that some people don’t think deeply. they can just see the surface and move on. for example watching sports bloopers my friend showed me a video people caning them selves on their bikes and skateboards and i was horrified that she was laughing because some of them would clearly have suffered traumatic brain injuries if not died, ended up in wheelchairs or had some lasting injury that meant they wouldn’t be able to do their sport anymore. i asked her about it and she said “i never actually thought about that, good point” also telling jokes they heard without realising how incredibly racist or sexist they were.
Not me but my older sister apparently came back from her first day at kindergarten incredibly ticked off because “those kids were pretending they didn’t know how to read”.
I thought it was normal for people to suddenly burst into anger out of no where. Luckily I was wrong.
As a little kid, I legit thought eveyone else's dad was always at the bar too.
I didn’t realize that it was okay to ask people for help as well as asking if I can have something. My dad made me think it was an inconvenience to ask if I could have a drink if we went to a family member’s house.
Being empathetic.
I have a birthmark on my tuchus, and when I was little I noticed my grandma had a nearly identical birthmark in close to the same spot. I just assumed everyone had a buttcheek birthmark from then on.
Being insecure somehow my parents made me feel like confidence = Arrogance.
Yelling and acting negatively over seemingly simple things. Neither of my parents modeled emotional stability and I actually thought it was normal to be crazy emotional all the time. They also put me down for ever showing emotions - i wasn’t allowed to have any, even if it truly spiked an emotional response.
Growing up with one highly racist parent, I was always taught that interracial couples were not okay.
As an innocent kid, I didn't realize it was a racist sentiment, and thought it was a culture thing (or something?). Needless to say, I was shocked when someone of another race expressed romantic interest in me.