Pick of the week: The Adoption
One Wednesday afternoon, two children were taken away from their parents and put into foster care. The Adoption (BBC Radio 4/iTunes) follows the story of their shattered family. It’s a podcast that is heart-wrenching but brilliantly delivered. Bethany, three, and her two-year-old brother, Ben, are described by their social worker as “absolutely adorable … They have been loved and wanted, there’s no doubt about that, but their parents haven’t always put their needs first.” She’s careful to avoid the word “neglect”, but will say that their needs haven’t been met.
The children witnessed anger and shouting and have been cared for by older siblings when their parents hadn’t been around. All they had when they arrived at their foster carer’s house was a teddy and a dummy each. Tellingly, there were no clothes. And while the children crying for their mum would have been bad, even worse is the fact that they didn’t. Jon Manel’s reporting remains impartial throughout: he’s just there to tell the story, which he followed over two years. (On average, it takes four months to place children with a new family.)
It’s never an invitation to judge and he talks to the parents, grandparents, social workers and potential new parents with great sensitivity and empathy. Names have been changed to protect identities, but it’s a harrowing slice of real life that details the complicated process of adoption from every point of view.
Each episode is intense, emotional and a useful way to demystify the adoption process. There are moments when it’s difficult to carry on listening. As the children’s birth father talks, you can feel his desperation to say exactly the right thing. “I just feel like getting in the car and having a good cry,” he admits. Manel gently presses their mother when she claims she has been treated unfairly, but he does so with respect and an ear for a balanced story. Although it’s almost unbearably sad when their grandparents take the children for an all-too-short visit to the park to jump in puddles, there’s joy in a bittersweet moment when the children run to the door to meet “new mummy and daddy”. The sound of their giggles is a sign that it’s going well.
Sadly, their story is not unique, but The Adoption tells it beautifully.
Your picks: #LikeAGirl
#LikeAGirl is led by Alesha Dixon, who is always refreshingly relatable, and YouTuber Hannah Witton – who seems wise beyond her years. It’s reassuring to hear them talking about their own failures and confidence issues. The second episode, Inspirational Role Models, is my favourite. The hosts explain how their personal role models help them in times of need. The downside is that there are only four episodes. Recommended by Rebecca McConkey
Have you ever thought deeply about what was used as a food source for plugged-in humans in The Matrix, or the likelihood of Jerry Seinfeld’s secret employment as a Russian spy? The pop-culture-obsessed hosts of Abstract Nonsense have, and they enthusiastically craft absurd fan theories that will change the way you view your favourite movie or TV show. They have contemplated whether Frasier and Niles might actually be lovers and not brothers; pondered the galactic economics of Stargate SG1; and proposed that Iron Man might actually be Spider-Man’s dad. Abstract Nonsense puts out two episodes a week and is a perfect way to exercise your thinking and laughing muscles at the same time. Recommended by Joe Lewis
Black Sheep is essential listening not just for history buffs, but for anyone who loves a good yarn. The softly spoken William Ray guides us gently through condemnation of our history’s villains to a more thoughtful understanding, and does it with a frankness and humour missing from most other true-crime shows. I suggest you start by listening to Eugenics: The Story of a Really Bad Idea and see if you’re not immediately hooked. Recommended by Jessie Fenton
Guardian pick: The Colour of Power
As a BAME woman, I found this latest episode, Token, was great for adding some texture to diversity reports instead of regurgitating faceless stats. The guests, Simon Woolley and Baroness Ruby McGregor, offered some illuminating truths surrounding the lack of BAME representation by going beyond the figures. The show is brilliant at pinpointing why the current systems in the UK are not favourable to diversity. Recommended by Jess Cole
