The true mark of friendship is understanding each other well enough to successfully mime an argument in the dark. This isn’t a metaphor, but a fact I discovered last weekend at the cinema. My friend and I were chatting as we took our seats, but once the trailers began, we stopped to watch them. The people directly in front of us? Not so much. Instead, they carried on with their conversation – if anything a little louder, so they could be heard over the Dolby surround sound.
My friend performed the internationally recognised double-open-palm gesture for: “What’s with these guys, huh?” I shrugged, as if to say: “Yeah, but whadda ya gonna do?” Soon, we were gesticulating back and forth so fast and furiously that, if we’d been holding sticks instead of popcorn, we could have started a fire.
Is it acceptable to talk during the trailers? My friend is unequivocally of the view that being able to stream movies at home has turned us all into animals, with etiquette amnesia. I, on the other (waggling) hand, think that as long as everyone shuts up when the film starts, it’s OK. In the unlikely event that the previews were the crucial deciding factor in booking your tickets, you can always Google and see them again the second you leave. It’s fine.
Admittedly, my bar is low here. Years ago, I was watching a film when, behind me, at a really pivotal and tense moment, a phone started ringing. Not even vibrating – ringing. I cringed for the poor, unfortunate individual who’d forgotten to put it on silent. How embarrassed they would be!
This presumption was proved wide of the mark when the call was answered, and a long, leisurely exchange took place at top volume. I did wonder if the person on the other end could hear the chorus of tuts throughout, because the one in the cinema was certainly oblivious.
I can say with utter confidence, as I heard every single word, that there was nothing urgent, or indeed interesting, about the lengthy discourse they shared. The disruption meant I missed whatever Bruce Willis’s deal in The Sixth Sense was, but that doesn’t matter – it probably wasn’t that important to the plot.
• Polly Hudson is a freelance writer
