A famous Dublin pub is on the look out for an Events Professional but a small minority of people are banned from applying.
Doyle's Corner in Phibsborough said they had an immediate
vaccination
vacancy for a dedicated, outspoken and hardworking person to fill their highly-sought after role.
They add that it is "not a work from home" position and requires being "around as many people as possible".
But there's just one problem, if your name is Gemma, you need not apply.
The boozer clearly states: "We are an equal opportunities... but no Gemmas please".
Key roles involved include:
Events Management - "Highly skilled in organising mass gatherings with a total disregard for public safety. Experience in traffic management, in particular blocking traffic.
IT Skills - "5G experience essential; knowledge of microchip installation and government surveillance."
Interpersonal Skills - Good communications skills are not important as you will be required to shout down and impose your views on anyone who disagrees with you; Manage conflict effectively... and by manage it means seek out conflict; Good writing skills, including lots of CAPS LOCKS; Use of megaphones desirable.
We wonder what notorious conspiracy theorist, we mean person, is that dig aimed at
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