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We Got This Covered
We Got This Covered
David James

‘Intrusive gay thoughts’: Pete Hegseth raises eyebrows by unveiling three incredibly gay sounding military operations

Since becoming the Secretary of War, Pete Hegseth has been fighting hard against diversity in the military. He’s pushed back roughly against gay people serving, saying they’re a “gateway” to engineering unit cohesion.

He also wrote that he regrets bending over and “not fighting the repeal” of Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, an unofficial policy that prevented gay people from acknowledging their sexuality in any way while serving.

Conversely, Hegseth has also repeatedly underlined that he demands soldiers be handsome and hard-bodied, mandating beauty standards while in uniform and putting his men through fierce, sweaty drills designed to weed out any weaklings.

All of which saw universally raised eyebrows when he unveiled a series of new military operations that sound like they were developed in collaboration with Chuck Tingle:

OPERATION ROUGH RIDER = Freedom of Navigation for U.S. ships

OPERATION MIDNIGHT HAMMER = Obliteration of Iranian nuclear sites

OPERATION SOUTHERN SPEAR = Destroy Narco-Terrorists killing Americans

Trump means business — and the world knows it. Peace Through Strength.”

As anyone with a brain spotted instantly, these are the gayest possible names for a military operation, all of them sounding like titles currently gracing the shelves behind the chain-link curtains of your nearest adult shop.

Steady on, Pete

So what’s going on here? Surely at some point, someone noticed this and was all “uh, Pete, buddy. This all sounds… well, kinda gay?” These double-entrendres weren’t lost on the internet:

It’s impossible to know what’s gone on here. I bet that whoever’s in charge of coming up with these names put them together as an obvious joke, never expecting them to actually be approved by Hegseth. That, or this is some kind of bizarre and convoluted joke Hegseth is playing on America.

Well, I guess alternatively, he could be a deeply repressed and frustrated gay man, and this bizarre situation is how that psychological strain is expressing itself…

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