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The Guardian - UK
The Guardian - UK
Sport
Daniel Harris (now) and Rob Smyth (earlier)

India beat England by 106 runs in second Test – as it happened

England captain Ben Stokes walks out after being sloppily run out for 11
England captain Ben Stokes walks out after being sloppily run out for 11. Photograph: Stu Forster/Getty Images

Which means that is us. Thanks all for your company and comments over the last five days, and believe we’ll be back for Rajkot. But until then, peace and love.

Here’s Ali Martin’s report from Visakhapatnam.

“Good to see the carping already starting,” writes Will Vignoles. “England have a method that has got the best of out of a relatively limited group of players, and mostly it’s working. It took two all-time performances for India to win this match – Jaiswal with the bat, Bumrah with the ball in the first innings, and sometimes that is the difference. Why must every defeat become a referendum on how England play? I’d much rather wake up to this than the shambles that came before, or the hopeless grinding of the 2016 tour.”

Agreed. I’m a 44-year-old man and I feel like i’m part of something, even though I know I’m not. I can’t wait for the next Test, nor the one after that and so on.

Stokes speaks to Eoin Morgan: he says England were full of confidence, as they always are whenever they turn up to a day of Test cricket. They wanted to assert their authority early and let India’s attack know they couldn’t settle; it’d be made hard for them.

Stokes praises Rohit and the way he juggled his bowlers, noting that every time England looked to be getting ahead, he and they found something, and he’s “real pleased” that his tea found themselves in a pressure situation and stuck to what they said they’d do.

He’s really pleased with his openers and how the negotiated the final hour yesterday – you can fiddle about and finish 20-0, but then game’s not gone anywhere. England, on the other hand, lost Duckett went before the close, but with 60 knocked off the target.

Crawley sensed the threat of Bumrah this morning the looked to get to work against the spinners and he’s had a great match, reckons his captain, especially as he’s not experienced conditions like these often in his career. Tis match is a great stepping stone for him.

England are off to Abu Dhabi between Tests, and he thinks that’s great. Tight matches are demanding emotionally, so it’s great for the players to have time off with their families, and he’s looking forward to the third Test.

Imagine working for him and Baz!

“The pundits and the media seem unified in this narrative that England are playing well, and have got India rattled,” says Ali Parker. “Well, we’re not. And we haven’t.

We lost this Test match by 106 runs and our last 80 runs were scored by tailenders. It was almost a thrashing. Only one England batsman scored 50. India walked it, and will now have Kohli back.

Our players get out playing delusional shots against good balls, and then give delusional interviews. Worse still, no one challenges them. The TV pundits have the manner of a primary school coach not wanting to upset his boys.

We should have won the Ashes but Australia realised if you just bowl short at England, our moth-to-a-flame batsmen cannot leave it alone, and get caught. Ashes retained by Oz, who know how to bat in Test cricket.

In India, every England batsman is trying to score at one run per ball. Each time we try it, India bowl us out in two sessions for under 300. Remind me of the definition of insanity? Guys – this isn’t working...”

Yeah, I understand this but I don’t agree with it. England were in a dreadful state before Stokes and Baz took over, and since then they’ve delivered some of the greatest matches, wins and moments in the 40 years I’ve been watching this thing of ours. And now they’re 1-1 after two, taking on the hardest challenge in cricket, having lost a match that was still alive at lunch on day four. They’re not perfect, but watching them play makes me feel things and the way they play means something. It’s very, very awesome.

Bumrah speaks: He doesn’t look at numbers. He did when he was a kid, but playing for England is a lot of pressure so he doesn’t want more. He’s really happy the team won.

Asked about knocking Root over and the yorker in particular, he references Waqar and Zaheer, also explaining that having come from tennis-ball cricket, it was the first ball he learnt and he still uses it to his advantage now.

He doesn’t feel like he’s the leader of the attack but given his experience, he does try and guide his teammates. He tells Rohit – who he’s known a long time – what he’s thinking, then if there’s anything with which his skipper disagrees, they discuss it, but otherwise he’s left to his own devices.

If he sees another quick do well, he doesn’t feel he has to compete with them – “kudos to them” is his response. He tries to solve problems and every wicket is different, so he needs all the tricks in his armoury then to pick the right ones for the circumstances.

Nope, it’s Bumrah!

Oh, apparently Jaiswal wasn’t POTM, he was something else. But he might still be …

Rohit says Bumrah is a champion player but when you win a match like that you have to look at the full picture. Jaiswal looks a very good player and understands his game really well but has a long way to go. His knock was exceptional and he’s got a lot to offer to the team so he hopes he stays humble and focuses on what is needed for the team.

The wicket was really good to bat on and a lot of his batters got starts but didn’t make a score. However they’re young and new to this form of the game so it’ll take time and this win will give them confidence. He’s very very proud of such a young squad to come back and perform like that having lost the first Test – he wants them to play freely without pressure.

The last couple of years England have played really good cricket so they knew it wouldn’t be an easy series, and now they need to make sure they do the right things before the next mTest.

Shubman Gill wins some other award, then Ben Foakes is named Smart Saver of the Match. Incredible scenes. Jaiswal then wins Strike of the Match for his driving, one to tell the grandkids about.

Jaiswal is POTM and rightly so, getting away without interview.

Stokes, bucket-hatted, says that England had full belief they could chase and taking on those challenges “is what we’re about”. When you’ve got a big target, that’s when you get the best out of yourselves as individuals, and they put india under pressure; India played well and he congratulates them.

There’s no instruction on how to play, the players are told to do their thing. Every player is a quality player able to assess conditions, situation and how they’re feeling, then take a view.

He’s really happy with his spinners in terms of effort and output, showing maturity and skill – he’s really proud of them as captain. On Jimmy, he again marvels, and on Bumrah acknowledges that you’ve got to say “Wow, what a player.” Finally, he’s congratulated on England’s style of play which brings people to the game, accepting thanks with the same sincerity he’d show had England won.

Aha, here the presentation comes.

Er, I’m now wondering whether we’re actually getting a presentation – I was on the Aussie Open final when the first Test ended, so can’t recall what went down. But we can keep chatting cricket nevertheless, so I’ll say that should Brook become available at any point, I’d probably bring him in for Bairstow, who had the misfortune to get injured when in the form of his life and now hasn’t scored a ton in 36 innings.

We’ve got 10 days before the third Test starts, so there’s no need for England to rest anyone. The question, then, is which bowlers they pick; it’s hard to see how anderson is left out, because at the very least he offers economy and, contrary to what one might expect, he bowls well in India – much more so than in Australia, where medium pace is the subcontinental version of bad spin: it gets whacked. I’d definitely stick with him, and have a look at the pitch before deciding between Wood, Bashir – and Robinson, who I also think might go well in these conditions and who bats pretty well.

While we wait for our presentation and in the absence of a fifth day, some nourishment for your soul to fill the gap: this mix from the lovely DJ Knobs, one of the residents at Accra’s mighty Polo Beach Club.

So why did England lose? Well, it’s easily done in India, but looking down the scorecard, there are, as Priscilla White would’ve said, a lorra lorra starts. They got their 20 wickets, but they didn’t score enough runs – another reason Jaiswal should be POTM.

cilla black on blind date

Evidence! As if he’s reading, yes of course he’s reading, Alastair Cook advises us that in Test-match history there’ve been 840 ninefers and only 407 double hundreds; Steve Finn points out there are more chances to get wickets because to win you necessarily need 20. I guess, though, it’s also worth noting that Bumrah is already a great; Jaiswal is 22.

Jaiswal says he really enjoyed the match. I’ll bet! India were focused on their process, which worked well.

He explains that in red-ball cricket he tries to bat till the end unlike in white, when he’s going for it from the start and throughout, then says the way Bumrah-bhai bowled was “incredible to watch”.

I think I’d give him player of the match because a score of 209 when the next-highest was 34 is ridiculous work. Without it, the match could’ve been close to over before Bumrah even had a ball in his hand, and a double hundred is rarer than nine-fer.

India look as relieved as they do excited, but they’ll know this England aren’t going away. We’ve seen loads of serieseseses in recent times where the tourists start well then get obliterated, but tat doesn’t feel like this.

What a Test match! Again! Bigupps to the curators too, another terrific Test-match track prepared, and well played both sides. Already, this series is an epic and we’re not even close to the end – I can’t wait for the rest of it because what we’re seeing here is special.

Hartley b Bumrah 36 (England 291 all out) India win by 106 runs, tying the five-match series at 1-1!!

Nine in the match for Bumrah and this is a jazzer, bouncing, moving away, and clattering the timber!

Updated

70th over: England 291-9 (Hartley 36, Anderson 5) We should now be taking tea but because India are within a wicket of winning, we’ll keep going … and with that in mind, Bumrah returns. Gulp. Anderson does the smart thing, and gets down the non-striker’s via leg bye.

69th over: England 291-9 (Hartley 36, Anderson 5) We see footage of the England balcony following that flowing Anderson drive, Stokes wide-eyed in affected amazement, then Ashwin returns hunting his 500th, Bumrah back grazing having done his bit. Hartley takes a single to point, then out comes the Anderson reverse, a flick off the glove taking the ball high and they run one, then Hartley again cuts to the fence for four. It’s worth noting that, though England will lose here, under any other captain they’re skittled for 63, which is to say they’re not just winning improbably, they’re losing superbly.

68th over: England 285-9 (Hartley 31, Anderson 4) Bashir has had a decent debut, though I wonder if he’s replaced by Wood for Rajkot. But enough about cricket, what are we saying about Anderson’s highlights? In his autobiography, Tony Cascarino wrote about dying his hair as he got older so his manager wouldn’t deem him old and in need of replacement; I reckon an earring’s coming next, Artie Bucco-style. A drive through mid on gets him off the mark via boundary-four, the only runs from the over.

WICKET! Bashir c Bharat b Mukesh Kumar 0 (England 281-9)

Shoaib dangles a bat outside off, a bit of away-movement causes ball to brush bat, and this is almost over.

68th over: England 281-8 (Hartley 31, Bashir 0) In comms, they’re talking about player of the match; KP reckons Bumrah, which would be harsh on Jaiswal; I’m going Brian Charles Anderson. Hartlety takes a single to third man…

67th over: England 280-8 (Hartley 30, Bashir 0) By the way, I loved Bashir’s interview after day one, especially when he described knocking over Rohit as “Very, very awesome”. It’s not often you hear the word “awesome” correctly used, but I have no reason to doubt he – and we – were in awe of whatever he felt in that moment and ever since, which reminded me a little of the below. Anyway, he stands up straight and defends Bumrah’s first ball nicely, then wears one on the pad; there’s an appeal but it’s going down. Three dots follow, then a wide no ball and a play-and-miss; over bowled, and Bashir can chill down the non-striker’s. England need 119 to win.

66th over: England 279-8 (Hartley 30, Bashir 0) Can Hartley find a single so Bashir doesn’t have to start his innings against Bumrah? He cannot. Bashir, for his part, haas only played six first-class matches and his highest score is 44 not out; good luck, old mate.

NOT OUT!

No edge, and India have one review remaining.

66th over: England 279-8 (Hartley 30, Bashir 0) Cunning from England, keeping Anderson till the bowlers are just that little bit more tired so he can come in and reverse-sweep England to victory. Jasprit Bumrah, though – when was the last time a bowler was the best in every format, and so conclusively? Mukesh, though, flings his third delivery across Hartley and the ball flies past the keeper’s dive for four, then Hartley goes at a wide one, misses, and Srikar is sure he heard something! The umpire says not, so India review…

WICKET! Foakes c&b Bumrah 36 (England 275-8)

Jasprit Bumrah is a genius! He sends down a slower one that baffles Foakes, and anticipating the prod, is right there to take the return catch! Surely India will see this home from here?!

65th over: England 275-7 (Foakes 36, Hartley 30) I wondered when Rohit would bring Bumrah back and the answer is now. You’d think a four-over burst from him sorts this, but Foakes follows his loosener, a bit of nip away enticing him to slash, and he edges for four!

“Well, I was hoping for an Old Trafford with Stokes and Foakes at the crease, emails Guy Hornsby. “And that surface a couple of summers back was certainly less flaky than this one, but Stokes’ hesitation did for him. India have been excellent again, but England must have had them slightly worried at 190-4. Those two wickets before lunch flipped the game, but if this era has done anything it’s made me way less despairing watching us play, and given I grew up in the late 80s and 90s, that’s a hell of a result in itself. And also I love Foakes so any runs from him cheers me up. It’s the little things.”

Yup, Stokes was, unusually for him, a little slow. He’s still out there, India are really feeling it.

64th over: England 271-7 (Foakes 32, Hartley 30) Mukesh replaces Kuldeep and Hartley takes a single to point, raising the fifty partnership. If England were to win from here, would this be their most ridiculous ridiculousness? I think the way these have changed the game most significantly is with the idea that anything is chaseable in the fourth innings – and given what teams make in ODIs, without the advantage of fielders behind the bat, why shouldn’t they? I remember during the dog-days of Root’s captaincy suggesting on here that the limited overs lads couldn’t do any worse because if they went in and whacked it they’d score, but it was a semi-joke borne of desperation. And now look! Four dots and a single complete the over; India will be starting to wonder just a little.

63rd over: England 269-7 (Foakes 31, Hartley 29) Hartley adds a single, making it eight from another decent over for England, and they need 130 to win.

The question is whether there was any kind of under-edge, or edge off the back of the bat, but looking at the footage, Hartley isn’t that close to the ball. I think he’ll be fine … and he is.

NOT OUT!

The ball comes off Hartley’s arm, not bat or glove, and it’s umpire’s call on lbw, which was given not out on the field. England escape, but now they’re checking Ultra-edge again! Drama!

Updated

England review!

Was there an edge?

WICKET! Hartley c Rohit b Ashwin 28 (England 268-8)

FIVE HUNDRED TEST WICKETS FOR A GIANT OF THE GAME! Hartley reverses, edges, and Rohit collects a terrific tumbling catch running behind Srikar Bharat!

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62nd over: England 268-7 (Foakes 31, Hartley 28) Hartley is enjoying this! Foakes skips down the track to shove a single down the ground, then when Ashwin strays towards leg, Hartley helps him around the corner for four to finest leg. I’m running out of superlatives! Two singles follow…

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61st over: England 261-7 (Foakes 29, Hartley 23) Hartley opens the face, tickling an edge with soft hands so the ball bounces before Rohit at slip, then under his dive and scuttles to the fence fo fo mo. So far in this series, Hartley’s average is 33.67, and he’s making a bid to play not just away but as the one spinner likely to be deployed at home. What’s impressive about him isn’t just his skills either, but the confidence and mentality to turn up in India and start executing them from his debut Test.

61st over: England 257-7 (Foakes 29, Hartley 19) Back in the hutch, England might have a few batters struggling to apply the no regrets philosophy. I remember Joe Root saying at the start of all this that he wasn’t sure how to Bazballify his style, which was mind-boggling in its way, because all he has to do to be part of any cricketing method is just bat like himself. And today, he got himself out batting like someone else, after getting a start like every other one of his teammates; another few from him, and this would feel very on. In the meantime, three from the over keeps England ticking, and this partnership is now worth 37.

60th over: England 254-7 (Foakes 27, Hartley 18) Hartley cuts Kuldeep away for one and looks pretty confident out there, while Foakes will be seeing this as the potential knock of his career – his batting has been extremely purposeful. I don’t think his place is under threat should Brook return because his keeping is worth more in India than elsewhere, but if he can develop into a Test-class batter, he’ll be difficult ti displace in all conditions. He takes one through square leg, then Hartley again deploys the typolicious cut-shot and this time earns four before ending the over with another single. England need 145 to win, India need three wickets.

59th over: England 247-7 (Foakes 26, Hartley 12) If England can get to within a hundred, India will get nervous, and there’s still a bit of batting to come. Foakes nicks a leg bye, then Ashwin yanks Hartley forward and totally diddles him with spin, missing the top of off; a single follows.

Thanks Rob and morning everyone. They couldn’t, could they? Well no, of course they couldn’t, but that we’re even thinking about it tells us all we need to know about our Testvangelists. But could they?

58th over: England 245-7 (Foakes 26, Hartley 11) Three singles from Kuldeep’s over, which takes us to drinks. And with that, it’s time for me to tag in Daniel Harris. See you in Rajkot!

Updated

57th over: England 242-7 (Foakes 24, Hartley 10) Hartley charges Ashwin and launches a boundary down the ground. Both in execution and intent, he is a really good Test No9.

Hartley is not out! It’s a comedy review, because Hartley middled a defensive shot and as the laws stand you can’t be out Bat Before Wicket.

Ashwin thought it flicked the pad first. You can understand his excitement, because had it done so Hartley was plumb.

India review for LBW against Hartley!

If it’s given it’ll be Ravichandran Ashwin’s 500th wicket.

56th over: England 238-7 (Foakes 24, Hartley 6) Now Foakes slog-sweeps Kuldeep for six, the fourth of this England innings to go with 35 fours. They are going down on their own terms. Their run-rate of 4.25 is the fastest by a visiting team who have batted 50 overs or more in the fourth innings in India. A niche and slightly desperate stat, I grant you, but it says a lot.

55th over: England 232-7 (Foakes 18, Hartley 6) Tom Hartley gets off the mark by driving Ashwin for six, because apparently that’s acceptable behaviour in the year 2024.

Updated

54th over: England 226-7 (Foakes 18, Hartley 0) That Stokes run out looks very sloppy on the replay. He jogged the first part, only speeding up in the last few yards when he realised he might be in trouble. It looks worse every time you see it; a bit of a shocker in fact.

The game has gone now, but a five-Test series is full of subplots. An unbeaten 40-odd from Foakes would help his case should Harry Brook return. He drives Kuldeep for four, then somehow manages to deflect a filthy grubber that had LBW written all over it.

Updated

53rd over: England 220-7 (Foakes 12, Hartley 0) “Surely you meant to speak of Bumrah as the fast bowling GOAT?” says Shantanu Anand. “Because he doesn’t come anywhere close to Anil Kumble, who is the third highest wicket taker ever (619) and has been part of many famous victories.”

It depends how much store you place on longevity. Bumrah is the Indian bowler I’d least like to face. I know averages aren’t everything, and he doesn’t care for them himself, but Bumrah’s numbers in all three formats are outrageous.

Foakes turned Ashwin into the leg side and set off for a single. Iyer picked up on the run and threw down the stumps in one smooth movement. There was a split-second of hesitation, which ultimately cost Stokes, but it was a fantastic piece of fielding.

Updated

WICKET! England 220-7 (Stokes run out 11)

And it’s goodnight from England. Ben Stokes has been run out brilliantly by Shreyas Iyer!

Updated

52nd over: England 217-6 (Stokes 11, Foakes 12) Kuldeep continues. This certainly isn’t a vile turner, but it’s not doing enough – vertically and horizontally – to ensure a batsman is never in.

The tempo has changed since lunch, with 23 runs in 9.2 overs. That’s not a great surprise given that Stokes and Foakes are England’s most patient batters. Once this partnership is broken, the game should end in hurry.

51st over: England 216-6 (Stokes 10, Foakes 12) Ashwin returns in place of Bumrah. I guess it would be fitting if Ben Stokes, who he has dismissed more than anyone, was his 500th Test wicket. Nothing doing in that over, but England get an extra run after a ricochet off the stumps. They need… no, we’re not into runs-to-win territory yet.

Now, I’ll level with you, this isn’t a comparison I saw coming. “I’m not sure if I’ve heard anyone describe this England team as great (Dale Webster, 44th over) but they are a good side, with a few outstanding players,” writes Phil Withall. “I’d compare them to the Norwich City side that finished third in the inaugural Premier league season. Entertaining, with a certain reckless disregard for their perceived role in the grand scheme of things. Not great but providing a few shocks, and turning mortals in heroes...”

They remind me a little – I would say this, I know – of the Danish Dynamite team of the 1980s: an unconquerable team of optimists who play with a groundbreaking, recklessly attacking style. Thank goodness Emilio Butragueno doesn’t play cricket.

50th over: England 214-6 (Stokes 9, Foakes 11) Stokes has been almost strokeless so far, as is his wont. He doesn’t look entirely comfortable against Kuldeep but is keeping him out – and he gets three bonus runs after a lazy misfields from Axar on the extra-cover boundary. That should have been an everyday single.

49th over: England 210-6 (Stokes 5, Foakes 11) Bumrah is into his old-ball work, a big, infectious smile on his face as the ball zings past Foakes’s outside edge. It barely missed off stump. The previous delivery took a thick edge and ran away for four.

At what point does Bumrah become the undisputed goat of Indian bowlers? I’d argue he’s already the greatest but perhaps he needs to reach the landmark of 200 Test wickets.

48th over: England 206-6 (Stokes 5, Foakes 7) “As much as I’m a fan of Joe Root, that damaged finger of his is doing more heavy lifting than is medically advisable,” says Harry Lang. “He’s so out of form he’d struggle to get selected as a scorer on the village team. Does Stokes owe him this much loyalty or perhaps a tactical rest might serve him better?”

Drop Joe Root? Not even Team Bazball are that funky. You’re right, he isn’t in great form and Bumrah is all over him, but I wouldn’t read too much into today’s innings. And I certainly wouldn’t drop him. No matter what form he’s in, he’ll always be the England player most likely to make a matchwinning daddy in these conditions; England also need his bowling and fielding at slip.

On that subject, it’ll be interesting to see what happens if Harry Brook returns. Ben Foakes hasn’t made many runs but has kept exceptionally. Jonny Bairstow has looked in great touch without reaching 40.

Updated

47th over: England 203-6 (Stokes 4, Foakes 5) Nice batting from Foakes, who flicks Bumrah through midwicket for four to a) get off the mark and b) bring up the England 200. Now they really are halfway there, and Gary Naylor is belting out Bon Jovi as we speak.

“I don’t see any problem,” says Nick Lezard. “No time pressure, Stokes and Foakes settling in, pitch not too leery, India getting complacent, game on. Of course I might be deranged from lack of sleep, but that’s all part of the fun, isn’t it? “

A lerry pitch? Hmm, Dennis Leary, isn’t it? Rescue Me, an American comedy-drama television series focussing on the professional and personal lives of a group of New York City firefighters? Marvellous.

Sorry, what were you sating about lack of sleep?

Updated

46th over: England 198-6 (Stokes 4, Foakes 0) Stokes batters Kuldeep into the boot of the sub fielder Sarfaraz Khan at silly point. He’s okay.

India go up for LBW when Stokes whips around a grubber – similar to Crawley’s dissmial, but that one definitely pitched outside leg. The bounce has been noticeably uneven since lunch. Stokes smiles – 60 per cent ruefully, 40 per cent cheerily – when he tries to pull Kuldeep and is almost bowled. He just managed to get a bottom edge into his pads.

45th over: England 196-6 (Stokes 2, Foakes 0) We’ve just seen a couple of replays which show that Rohit almost didn’t review the Crawley LBW. Kuldeep eventually persuaded him, which was a good effort after that slightly farcical review yesterday evening.

Meanwhile, Bumrah beats Stokes with a ball that keeps low. A delivery like that must unnerve Stokes, who was a victim of uneven bounce in the first innings. Foakes also plays and misses at one that climbs outside off stump.

44th over: England 195-6 (Stokes 1, Foakes 0) Foakes struggled against Kuldeep in the first innings. He’s beaten outside off stump, pushing defensively down the wrong line at a not dissmilar delivery to the one that bowled him on Saturday.

“I’ve been meaning to send this for a while now, but can see why this could be seen as Captain Hindsight,” says Dale Webster. “As great as the Bazball era has been thus far and the amazing things that have been accomplished, great teams don’t keep putting themselves in positions where they have to make history to get out of them. Maybe this is just a good team playing above their nominal level. Caveat being that this isn’t 100% over. Probably is, but not 100%.”

I may have misread the room, but is anybody claiming England are a great team? They’re great fun, and a unique team who are overachieving because of the genius of their captain and coach.

43rd over: England 194-6 (Stokes 0, Foakes 0) Bumrah completes the wicket maiden he started before lunch. That, incidentally, was the 69th time Bairstow has been out bowled or LBW in his Test career.

The players are back on the field. This might not take long.

“Here in Thailand, we feel that this match is finally coming to life after 3.5 days of humdrum Bazball that’s failed to keep us awake after 7pm local time,” writes Tim Finney. “Stage is now set for a Stokes/Foakes/Woakes (ignore that last one) victory charge, with Hartley the most likely scorer of the winning run an hour after tea. Before we embark on a celebratory arm wrestle with the local stingrays, who generally win (like India).”

MCC Women do the Cresta Run!

“It is 5am, and I have just woken up in Switzerland’s St Moritz,” wrote my colleague Emma John a couple of hours ago, when there was far too much going on for me to process a long email. “I am with a group of women cricketers who are making history today by becoming the first all-female team to compete in the Cresta Run’s Inter Club Challenge. Yes – that Cresta Run. The one David Gower did. The one where you slide head first down 3-4 miles of ice in 40 seconds, on the tobogganing equivalent of a very heavy tea tray.

“Anyway, this entirely self-funded team is here to raise money for the girls and women’s cricket projects run by the MCC Foundation in Nepal and South Africa and we would love people to sponsor us. It feels an appropriate cause given that women were banned from the Cresta Run til 2018…

“The Cresta Run is so dangerous that you need to have two days of training before you’re allowed to race. Ours starts in just over an hour’s time with the notorious ‘death talk’, which is where the instructors tell you all the different ways you can maim and injure. Apparently we should be comforted that ‘only’ five people have died on the Run in its 139-year history…”

Good luck to one and all. If you’d like to donate, because you’re high on life after that wonderful session or just an innately good person with a healthy disposable income, you can do so here.

Updated

My head is spinning. There was so much going on in that session, from Joe Root’s skittish innings to Ravi Shastri’s repeated declarations of love for Zak Crawley. The biggest moments, and there were a few, was Rohit Sharma’s marvellous reaction catch to dismiss Ollie Pope, who had been hitting boundaries at will.

For most the session England were right in the game – 132 for two, then 194 for four – but those two late wickets have settled it.And while this blog is inevitable Anglocentric, we should say that India did so well to hold their nerve – and maintain their sanity – in the face of a ceaseless assault from England. With the possible exception of Australia, any other team in the world would have wilted.

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Lunch

The wicket means that’s the last ball of a pulsating morning. It was subtle at times, pugilistic at others, and it ended – like all the best sessions – with an affronted Jonny Bairstow giving somebody a mouthful.

There were 127 runs and five wickets in 25.4 overs. England played brilliantly, they really did, but you can only defy this marvellous Indian attack for so long in the fourth innings. Gravity always wins.

Updated

WICKET! England 194-6 (Bairstow LBW b Bumrah 26)

That’s the game! Bumrah wins the battle of the JBs, trapping Bairstow in front with a nipbacker. Ashwin celebrates in front of Bairstow, who tells him where to go.

Bairstow reviews, just in case, but deep down he knows. It was umpire’s call on height, so not quite as plumb as I thought, but still palpably out.

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42nd over: England 194-5 (Bairstow 26, Stokes 0) The timing of India’s wickets has been exemplary. Every time England threaten to get in front, India pull them back in.

India celebrate wildly, which shows how much they fear Crawley. He made a brilliant 73, an innings of class, patience and admirable shot selection, but he’s gone now. The England balcony are all gawping at replays, clearly not convinced. It looked out to me, both live and on replay, although it was close to umpire’s call when it hit leg stump. On TNT Sports, Sir Alastair Cook says it “didn’t look right”.

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WICKET! England 194-5 (Crawley LBW b Kuldeep 73)

He’s gone!

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INDIA REVIEW FOR LBW AGAINST CRAWLEY! A double bowling change, with Kuldeep Yadav on for Axar Patel. Crawley has just been compared to Kevin Pietersen by an increasingly smitten Ravi Shastri – but he might be gone now! He whipped across the line and was hit on the pad in front of leg stump. Marais Erasmus said not out and India went upstairs. Crawley looks very sheepish. I reckon this is out.

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41st over: England 192-4 (Crawley 72, Bairstow 25) Bumrah has two slips and a gully for Bairstow, who drives two terrific boundaries – one through extra cover, one square. Bairstow has looked in brilliant touch in this series, which makes his run of nothing scores (37, 10, 25, 21*) even more frustrating. England would sacrifice a year’s worth of positive vibes for a matchwinning hundred from Bairstow today. He was the one who started all this fourth-innings insanity at Trent Bridge in 2022.

“Looking at the scorecard, England aren’t even halfway there yet,” says Gary Naylor. “On the other hand, ENGLAND ARE NEARLY HALFWAY THERE ALREADY! This is what Bazball has done to us. No wonder Joe Root can’t think straight.”

Of all the miracles of Bazball, getting Gary Naylor to inadvertently referecne Bon Jovi is right up there.

40th over: England 184-4 (Crawley 72, Bairstow 17) A maiden from Axar to Crawley. And now, with 18 minutes to go to lunch, Rohit Sharma invites Jasprit Bumrah to end all this nonsense.

39th over: England 184-4 (Crawley 72, Bairstow 17) Crawley dances down to drive Ashwin through mid-off for four, another beautiful shot. He’s supposed to be Mr Inconsistent but he has now reached 20 in his last nine innings: 33, 44, 189, 22, 73, 20, 31, 76, 71*.

Meanwhile Bairstow, who is looking better after a nervous first 10 balls, punches Ashwin off the back foot to the cover boundary. Honestly, this is the most brilliant cricket from both teams.

“Harking back to the first Test (and a bit of this game) re Tom Hartley lookalikes,” says Dale Webster. “I can’t put my finger on it but Axar Patel reminds me of Daniil Medvedev.”

Yeah I can see that. I think it’s to do with the contours of the face, and if it wasn’t for this pesky all-action cricket I’d Photoshop a side-by-side comparison.

38th over: England 175-4 (Crawley 67, Bairstow 13) Crawley is beaten by a jaffa from Axar that bounces just over off stump. His roundarm angle makes him so dangerous on pitches where only some balls turn.

“Root’s wicket clinches it,” says Andrew Crossley. “I’ll be off to bed at lunchtime. Has been fun thinking a ridiculous win was actually possible, though.”

37th over: England 174-4 (Crawley 66, Bairstow 13) Crawley sweeps Ashwin for a couple and scrunches a single to long on. The boundaries have dried up for Crawley – his last was in the 26th over – but there’s no sign of him getting impatient.

Bairstow does get a boundary, sweeping brusquely through square leg.

36th over: England 167-4 (Crawley 63, Bairstow 9) The spinners are getting through the overs so quickly that it’s hard to keep up. It’s been a blistering morning session: 22 overs, 100 runs, three wickets.

35th over: England 165-4 (Crawley 61, Bairstow 9) Crawley survives a stumping referral after playing and missing at Ashwin, who is all over England. Crawley flicks not far wide of short leg for a single, then Bairstow is beaten outside off.

This is what Ashwin does, particularly in India. Of the nine bowlers with 500 Test wickets (come on, it’s in the post), only Ashwin has taken more than half his wickets in home victories: 272 at an average of 17.80, which is 55 per cent. Even Muttiah Muralitharan managed only 38 per cent.

34th over: England 165-4 (Crawley 61, Bairstow 9) Bairstow plays a lovely, languid cover drive for four off Axar, who responds with a jaffa that somehow misses both the edge and the off stump. England are going down in a blaze of boundaries: they’ve hit 26 fours and two sixes in just 34 overs.

33rd over: England 156-4 (Crawley 60, Bairstow 1) At some point in the next few minutes/hours, Ravichandran Ashwin will become the ninth man to take 500 Test wickets. The phrase “elite club” doesn’t really do it justice: Muttiah Muralitharan, Shane Warne, Jimmy Anderson, Anil Kumble, Stuart Broad, Glenn McGrath, Courtney Walsh, Nathan Lyon.

Bairstow is struggling against Ashwin, who continues around the wicket to the right-handers. He tries to cut and is beaten, then inside-edges onto the body. A maiden.

It’s been a superb half hour for Rohit Sharma. He took a blinder to dismiss Ollie Pope, and his decision to keep mid-on up directly contributed to Joe Root’s wicket.

32nd over: England 155-4 (Crawley 60, Bairstow 1) Two from Axar’s over. Mercy.

31st over: England 154-4 (Crawley 59, Bairstow 0) This game is moving at dizzying speed.

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The remarkable Ravichandran Ashwin moves to 499 Test wickets. Root came down the track, was done in the flight and sliced the ball high to Axar Patel at short third man. It was an ugly shot, an off-balance swipe across the line, to end an unusually skittish knock of 16 in 10 balls. Maybe Root’s finger wasn’t up to a longer, more orthodox innings.

Let’s take the positives: at least Bumrah didn’t get him again.

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WICKET! England 154-4 (Root c Axar b Ashwin 16)

No need for the third umpire this time: Root has gone!

Root is not out! It was much closer than I thought, though: pad first and umpire’s call on the point of contact. Oof.

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30th over: England 140-3 (Crawley 55, Root 13) Root charges Axar and muscles a drive over mid-off for six. Whether it’s because of a dodgy finger or just a tactical decision, he has come out swinging.

India review for LBW against Root off the final ball of the over, though I’m pretty sure it’s outside the line. Might have been an inside-edge as well.

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29th over: England 140-3 (Crawley 53, Root 8) Root reverse-sweeps his first and third balls for four. The first was smooth and stylish, the second gloved just over slip. I have no idea what kind of Test cricket this is, but it’s positively amphetaminic to watch. I can’t remember the last time I felt so awake at 5am.

Drinks

That was the last act of a breathless, brilliant first hour. Joe Root is the new batsman; we’ll soon find out what state his finger is in.

Rohit’s defensive captaincy has been criticised this morning but he has changed the mood of the match, maybe the series, with a piece of fielding that is probably going viral as we speak. Pope tried to force Ashwin off the back foot and edged towards slip, where Rohit took a stunning reaction catch to his left before throwing his arms out in celebration. He is rarely so demonstrative, but he knows how important that wicket is likely to be. Pope was looking so dangerous.

WICKET! England 132-3 (Pope c Rohit b Ashwin 23)

What a catch from Rohit Sharma!

28th over: England 132-2 (Crawley 53, Pope 23) Look, it probably won’t last, and for all we know the apocalypse could be imminent, but right now England are batting brilliantly. Pope dances down to clip Patel through midwicket for four, a courageous and superbly placed stroke. He has 23 from 19 balls, Crawley 53 from 92.

27th over: England 126-2 (Crawley 52, Pope 18) “Whisper it quietly but Zak Crawley looks like he has got his game face on here,” says Brian Withington. “He’s playing the magnificent Bumrah indecently well. Wicket looking sporting mind…”

Crawley is England’s best player of high pace, isn’t he? He treated Pat Cummins like a net bowler during the Ashes, and is one of the few players in cricket history who would probably prefer to face Marshall, Holding and Garner than Larsen, Harris and Latham.

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26th over: England 125-2 (Crawley 51, Pope 18) Crawley, on the charge, lofts Axar back over his head for four to reach a stately half-century from 83 balls. Ravi Shastri, commentating on TNT Sports, is positively gushing about how good Crawley has become.

England are trying to get as many runs as possible before the pitch deteriorates and/or the ball starts to reverse. Pope sweeps and clips successive boundaries to make it 13 from the over and 58 from 12 overs this morning.

25th over: England 112-2 (Crawley 46, Pope 10) Ashwin replaces Bumrah, who will be back when the ball starts to reverse. He has a huge shout for caught behind turned down when Pope tries to reverse sweep and gets in a tangle. There was an incriminating noise but Rohit Sharma chose not to review. We haven’t yet seen a replay.

24th over: England 109-2 (Crawley 45, Pope 8) Pope, who usually starts frenetically, looks positively serene at the moment. He reverse sweeps Patel for four and defends the rest of the over with confidence– and, crucially after what happens to Rehan, on the front foot.

23rd over: England 105-2 (Crawley 45, Pope 4) Bumrah continues, possibly because Pope has just come to the crease. Crawley is on strike for now, and he clips a stylish boundary through midwicket. He has been, by some distance, England’s best player of Bumrah so far in the series.

This is such a good contest. Bumrah beats Crawley with a bit of low bounce and then stares at him – not menacingly, because he’s far too jaunty a soul for that, but certianly with intent.

“What England win percentage is SmythViz giving?” asks Paul Harrison.

SmythViz was discredited a long time ago when somebody discovered it was the first algorithm to have a built-in pessimism. With that in mind, I reckon about 10 per cent. Et tu?

Rehan was almost outside the line, but it was umpire’s call so he’d have been out anyway.

22nd over: England 99-2 (Crawley 39, Pope 4) Rehan played his role pretty well, though the lead-up to his dismissal was a little ominous for England. He was dropped at slip, a very sharp diving chnce to Rohit from a ball that turned a long way. The next three deliveries all came in with the arm and, more pertinently, all kept low.

The new batter Ollie Pope waves his first ball assertively to the cover boundary.

WICKET! England 95-2 (Rehan LBW b Axar 23)

Rehan’s useful, chaotic cameo ends when he whips around a grubber from Axar and is trapped LBW. He walks straight off without discussing a review, but there’s a small chance he was outside the line.

21st over: England 91-1 (Crawley 39, Rehan 19) Bumrah’s control is endlessly impressive, types your intrepid, bleary-eyed report just before he spears four byes down the leg side. I guess he was going for the yorker.

Two balls later Crawley rifles a thrilling, classical off-drive for four. The ball hasn’t really moved for Bumrah, though you’d expect it to reverse swing in his next spell.

20th over: England 83-1 (Crawley 35, Rehan 19) A fast, thrify over from Axar. These are the moments to cherish, you know. England could easily be bowled out for 180, and if that happens our brains will slowly misremember how the match unfolded. But right now, though India remain strong favourites, there is a delicious tension in Vizag.

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19th over: England 82-1 (Crawley 34, Rehan 19) Shreyas Iyer saves four with a fine stop at gully when Rehan thick-edges Bumrah. Rehan, who has struggled against Bumrah in this series, is beaten later in the over. Another maiden. Never mind the pace, the swing, the set-ups and the unusual action: Bumrah’s control of line and length is endlessly impressive.

“Good luck for today’s OBO stint,” writes Andrew Crossley. “Anything’s possible, even if an India win at some point in the evening session is likeliest.

“My dilemma, as play begins at 9pm Colorado time, is to decide what number of wickets allows me to banish the temptress hope, and go to bed at the almost reasonable 11pm. If it’s only one or two wickets in the morning session, I’ll be sorely tempted to push through to the small hours.

“I might ask Chat GTP, as that seems to be the solution all my students take at the first sign of uncertainty…”

Please do. AI is on course to kill us all by the year 2030. But if anything can make it malfunction, it’s surely the illogicality of Bazball. As for the wickets, trust your instinct. If England are 190 for nine at lunch but Ben Stokes is still at the crease, we all know you’re staying up.

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18th over: England 82-1 (Crawley 34, Rehan 19) Rehan charges Axar and heaves the ball to cow corner for four. It was an ugly stroke but highly effective, and he follows it with a terrific cover drive for four more. India already have a long-on in place for Rehan, which is surely too defensive at this stage.

“Morning Rob!” chirps Martin Wright. “All bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, are we?! Me neither. It’s going to be over today, isn’’t it, one way or t’other?”

Oh aye, probably by tea.

17th over: England 73-1 (Crawley 34, Rehan 10) Crawley is beaten twice by Bumrah. The first was a slightly loose stroke, the second a snorter that kicked from a length. It’s been an immaculate start from Bumrah, who is getting closer and closer to off stump – and to Crawley’s outside edge. After 11 dot balls, Crawley lands his first blow with a thumping drive to the left of mid-off for four. Lovely stroke.

“Greetings from the airport (the only reason I’m up at this unholy hour),” says Eva Maaten. “I am completely amazed how England have managed to make this series, which was flying slight below my radar, so exciting! I’m probably not alone in having had very low expectations, but so far it has been riveting and I’m looking forward to another exciting run chase and close finish.”

16th over: England 69-1 (Crawley 30, Rehan 10) With two right-handers at the crease, Axar Patel starts at the other end. Rehan Ahmed swipes his first ball just short of mid-on, a statement of anarchic intent, and then drags a big heave onto the pad.

15th over: England 67-1 (Crawley 29, Rehan 9) Bumrah with starts a maiden to Crawley, who leaves each of the last five deliveries. One shaped back a little; the rest passed harmlessly outside off stump. Bumrah will work his way in towards off stump as his spell progresses.

The players are out on the field, and Jasprit Bumrah is ready to bowl.

399 to win? Less ‘ave a go.

Mood music (3.55am)

Mood music (3.41am)

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At the close of play last night, Shubman Gill said the game was about 70/30 in India’s favour, a throwaway comment which laid bare India’s mental state. I doubt even the most hopeful (and sane) England fan would put their chances to day at 30 per cent. India know they should win this game, almost certainly will, but they have been slightly spooked by England’s escapologists. The life of the mind, eh.

You can understand Gill’s wariness: he is one of three players in this XI who watched England chase 378 at Edgbaston in 2022. (The others are Shreyas Iyer and Jasprit Bumrah, and yes I was also surprised it was only three. Even England only have six survivors from that game. Life moves pretty fast…)

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The highlight of yesterday’s play, with a loving nod to Ben Stokes’ genius in the field, was a charming century from Shubman Gill. Tanya Aldred writes as Gill bats, with an inimitable grace and class, so this is well worth reading.

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Preamble

All things being equal, England will lose a Test match today. Yet they go into the fourth and final day at Vizag full of optimism that they can make history by chasing a mighty target of 399. Even England supporters, many of whom have been terrified of hope their entire adult lives, are full of the joys.

England will resume on 67 for one, needing a further 332 runs to take an absurd 2-0 lead in the series. The last time India were 2-0 down at home was against Shane Warne, Glenn McGrath and chums in 2004-05. It surely won’t come to that. All logic says they will win comfortably, probably by around 162 runs, especially as Joe Root has a badly injured finger. But Bazball has an injunction against logic.

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