There was a silver lining to the cloud for those cricket fans who had hoped to enjoy a day off watching England wrap up the Ashes today. The series may have ended with a day to spare, but at least there was no need to resort to the usual lame excuses about why you haven't showed up for work.
Whether out of frivolity or necessity, most of us occasionally feel the need to take time out of our working lives at short notice. But what happens when, for whatever reason, simply phoning in and taking the day off isn't an option?
Would you go as far, perhaps, as the Aberdeen hotel cleaner who last week admitted faking an assault on himself with a boulder and a razor blade in an attempt to dupe his employer into giving him paid leave (he paid instead with his job)? One can only hope not.
Of course, we should emphasise that there is nothing big or clever about skiving off work. Absence from work has been estimated to cost the UK economy more than £13bn a year, and back in January cold remedy manufacturer Benylin was condemned by business leaders for encouraging people to "throw a sickie" at the first sign of illness (while also popping its capsules, naturally).
But while a guilty conscience gets the better of most workers' temptation, who among us can honestly say they've never succumbed to the occasional over-diagnosis of a mild sniffle (definitely the beginnings of swine flu), the after-effects of a big night out (swine flu again, I reckon), or even a recurrence of an achy back (if that's not swine flu, I don't know what is).
For those more schooled in the art of procuring a day off, how about these genuine examples of explanations for time off given to employers, revealed in a survey of bosses by recruitment company Robert Half International: "I need time to find myself". "My garage door is broken". "I'm going to jail". Or, my personal favourite, "My partner and I need to practise for the square-dancing contest in town today".
What are the best excuses you've heard – successful or otherwise – for not turning up to work?
