JAYDE Britton died at home, surrounded by her family and loved ones, but it was anything but peaceful.
The last six days of her life were "hell on earth". For Jayde. For her family and friends. And for her partner, Abbey Egan.
"We just felt so helpless, watching the absolute torment Jayde was going through and not being able to do anything," Ms Egan said.
"We are all traumatised from the memories of that last week."
Ms Britton had fought a hard battle with cancer for 18 months.
Prior to her diagnosis, she had spent a year visiting doctors in Newcastle and Melbourne trying to find an explanation for the pain and heavy monthly bleeding she was experiencing. But when treatment for a suspected kidney infection in March, 2017, didn't work, an MRI revealed Ms Britton had cervical cancer.
By the time it was discovered, it was stage four.
She died in October, 2018.
She was 32 years old.
"Jayde was never a quitter - even before her diagnosis," Ms Egan said. "If she put her mind to something that she wanted to achieve, she would figure out a way to do it. And she had that attitude for her entire battle with cancer."
Ms Britton had been in and out of hospital. She had tried multiple treatments and underwent several surgeries in a bid to buy more time. But the cancer had spread rapidly.
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She had been due to have another procedure when a doctor intervened. He suggested that instead of putting her body through another surgery and another difficult recovery, she go home and enjoy the time she had left.
She died three weeks later.
"She woke up on the Friday morning and said, 'I don't want to be here anymore, I've had enough'," Ms Egan said. "The problem was, from the Friday to the Wednesday - when she actually passed away - it was just horrific. That's the only word I can use to describe it.
"For the six days, myself, my family and Jayde's family all lived in our house and watched her, quite literally, fade away. Watched what happened to her."
Ms Egan said her partner had suffered "terminal restlessless". She had started to hallucinate as her body began to shut down.
"She was moaning and she was trying to crawl out of her bed and take her clothes off," she said. "She was confused and distressed about where she was and what was happening.
"One of her vertebrae had cracked due to some tumours that had grown near her abdomen. So we actually had to get into the bed with her to roll her over so she didn't get bed sores, and it was hell on earth - she would scream blue murder.
"She was in so much pain. She stopped eating and drinking - you go into starvation mode and with that, your bowels can become impacted, and she got to the point where she was vomiting her own faeces.
"I don't think anyone should have to go out that way. She should not have had to have these awful things happen to her."
The trauma of watching her partner - her love, her rock, her cheerleader - suffer in those precious final days, hours and minutes had prompted Ms Egan to advocate for voluntary assisted dying (VAD) laws to be introduced in NSW.
Ms Egan will lead a group of supporters in manning stalls at the Hunter's shopping centres on Saturday (January 30) to collect signatures for a Dying With Dignity petition to support a VAD Bill bound for NSW Parliament later this year.
RELATED: Supporters renew voluntary assisted dying reform campaign
"I want a law that allows people who are terminally ill to opt-out, essentially," she said. "When they are terminal, and they have been told they are going to die, people should have the choice to end their lives on their terms when the suffering becomes unbearable - and Jayde's suffering was unbearable."
Ms Egan said the palliative care team had done "everything in their power" to help make Ms Britton more comfortable.
"But it just wasn't enough for Jayde," she said. "It was a horrific fight until the very end. I just think how much nicer it would have been for her, and us, had she been given a choice. We could have had this conversation when she was diagnosed. When she woke up and said 'I've had enough, I want to go', I could have rung all the people who loved her most, who would have all been well aware of her wishes after having conversations with her about it in the months leading up to it.
"They could have come and said their goodbyes and been around her in a place that was full of love and peacefulness, as opposed to one full of terror and trauma."
Ms Britton was the kind of person who attracted a lot of good friends. She was generous with her time and energy, knowledge and advice. She adored her family.
But Ms Egan has found the mental images of her partner suffering - still so raw and vivid and devastating - to be inescapable. At times, they cast a shadow over the good memories too.
"The funeral home sent me a draft for the death notice in the paper for proof reading shortly after Jayde's death," she said.
"In the midst of my grief I got this email that said: 'Jayde Britton passed away peacefully at home surrounded by loved ones'. And the rage and anger that went through my body...because you read that all the time, and in so many cases, it is just not the truth.
"She died surrounded by everyone in the world who loved her most. But in no way, shape or form was Jayde's death peaceful."
Sign the petition via https://dwdnsw.nationbuilder.com/petition_2020
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