WHEN Jose Field started to find it more difficult to talk, she thought it was a consequence of being a smoker.
Her voice had become raspy, and hoarse.
But when it worsened to the point she found herself thumping on the walls or texting her teenage children upstairs to let them know dinner was ready, she decided to have it looked at.
The Lake Macquarie woman, now 45, also had some unexplained weight loss, and had begun to get regular, painful headaches.
"I had always been a bigger person. My diet wasn't great - I was drinking heaps of Coke and just eating whatever I wanted to, but I was losing weight," she said. "I also started to notice I needed to have liquid to help me wash my food down."
Ms Field was eventually referred for an MRI.
"It turned out I had some benign tumours in my brain," she said. "The one that was causing the most problems was pushing on my brain stem. It was causing my weight loss, my voice and swallowing problems."
Ms Field was booked in for surgery after experienced neurosurgeon, Dr John Christie, watched her stand and walk across a consulting room at John Hunter Hospital.
"He said, 'Right, we need to get you in for surgery next week'," she said.
Ms Field had been putting on a brave front for her family and friends - but especially her children.
"They were 13 and 17 at the time," she said. "I was petrified. My 13-year-old son has autism, and he was very practical about it. But I was freaking out. I kept thinking, I can't do this. Who else is going to look after him the way I look after him? No one can replace your mum."
Her partner, family and friends rallied to help.
"The morning of the surgery - on September 20, 2018 - I was being wheeled into the theatre and I just burst into tears. It just hit me. Brain surgery. It is a pretty big deal," she said. "They were brilliant though."
Ms Field, now back working part time, spent a month at John Hunter Hospital.
Rehabilitation at the Rankin Park Centre and the Hunter Brain Injury Service in Newcastle followed.
Speaking during Brain Injury Awareness Week, Ms Field said recovering from a brain injury - whether it was brought on by an accident, a stroke, or a tumour - was different for everyone. It was not just a physical recovery, but a mental one too.
"I said a lot of very hurtful things in my first year of recovery. I yelled at people. I said nasty things to people. Things I wouldn't have said before. It was just happening. I couldn't control it," she said. "It wasn't fair to them. It wasn't fair to my children. I damaged some relationships, and now that I'm almost back to where I was before, I am trying to fix things."
She had worked hard - with physiotherapists, speech and occupational therapists and rehab nurses to regain her strength and independence.
Psychiatrists, psychologists and social workers helped her come to terms with her new reality.
"It has been a crappy journey. And I hate saying it - it's so cliched - but there is light at the end of the tunnel."
