The constant treadmill of work and urban living can push some people to the brink of making a life-changing decision that alters and rearranges all aspects of their life, even if they don't realise it at the time.
And sometimes that decision is to move home - but would you purchase a derelict property that was descending into a pile of rubble, and imagine you could turn it into a truly unique place to live?
If you want to relocate to Monmouthshire, the most expensive county in Wales to buy a home, and the budget is tight then a pile of rubble might be all you can afford to progress your dream.
READ MORE: The couple fighting to save derelict country manor that's going to take decades to rebuild
Ben, a civil servant living in Cardiff, was desperate for a big change in his life. He found a stone barn on the verge of total collapse in 2018 and, without much thought, decided to buy the crumbling 200-year-old barn that no-one else was willing to take on. His story features on property TV show Derelict Rescue on the discovery + channel.
Ben says: "I just knew that it was right and knew that I had to come to have a look at it and see what I could do with it. It was a big risk because there was no planning whatsoever, there was no ground with it to be able to park or have a garden, but I just fell for it straight away."
Luckily Ben's best mate is a builder who was keen to take on the barn and Ben thought he could also rope in his partner, farmer Fraser, when he wasn't busy with the animals and the land.
However, Fraser didn't seem that interested at first, and seeing the state of the building, it's not hard to see why - it was covered in foliage, it could not really be seen, and it was probably only the foliage that was keeping the barn standing.
But it was the only way for the couple to get onto the property ladder in their preferred area near the coast in this pricey county. The core of the move for Ben was being able to live near Fraser's family farm with the aim of living together, because life was challenging living so far apart.
But Ben impulsively bought the barn and a strip of land from the farmer next door to create a garden, without even discussing it with Fraser, so that came as a bit of a shock, as did the price - the whole purchase package came to £47,000.
But none of that shock compared to what lay beneath the foliage - a very shaky structure and what was left of the barn was literally falling down, crumbling with every gust of wind. But Ben remained positive and even the site of ramshackle walls could not dampen his high spirits.
Two years after putting the planning application into the local council in June 2018 Ben finally got the permission to start his epic renovation, and the ride of his life, so far, began.
The outside was to be rebuilt to its full size and shape, using the existing stone and a full-height glazed window in the place of the current doorway, the roof trusses would be replaced and the roof built with natural slate.
Inside, there would be a large open-plan kitchen and living area at one end of the barn and at the other end a snug and office space. Upstairs there would be two double bedrooms and a bathroom and the resident bats would be rehoused in a reclaimed railway carriage and a garden with a patio for Ben and Fraser.
The timescale was six to eight months and the budget only £130k so Ben was keen to do as much work as he could himself, as mainly a labourer, leaving the specialist jobs like plumbing and electrical work to the trained professionals.
Luckily for Ben his best mate Matt, who he's known since school, is a builder and was willing to take on this extreme renovation project.
Matt says of Ben: "He's very strong headed, he knows what he wants and what Ben wants, Ben gets!" - it was going to be an interesting project that might test their friendship to the limit, as well as push the barn itself to its actual, total breaking point.
One idea from Fraser - who admitted Ben wouldn't let him touch any of the decorating - that passed the Ben test was the inclusion of a 'letterbox' window on the end wall above the kitchen units.
Ben says: "It's going to look really nice inside, and that was Fraser's one idea and anybody that comes has to hear about it, how he's come up with this ingenious design, and it's down to him that we've got all these modern features - but, I'll let him have that one!"
Ben did not waver from his positive attitude but it was tested in November 2020 when it was time to make the site safer, so the unstable front wall and lintel were demolished and the stone kept to be used in the rebuild.
But the remaining walls that Ben wanted to retain were looking precarious and the derelict nature of the barn meant they were forced to take down even more of the structure, so about 70% of the original walls were rubble.
The couple kept all the stone to be used as the newly built exterior walls, but this was going to mean extra time and crucially extra money - adding up to £10,000 to Ben's already tight budget.
He says: "The wall is now really unstable which I'm a little bit worried about because obviously that's part of the original barn that I want to keep. I've kind of got to the end of today and I'm kind of thinking, well, what have I done, because it's even more of a mess than it was before! It has kind of slightly shocked me because so much of it has gone!"
But positive Ben found a silver-lining to this added disaster. He says: "The walls have gone from two foot thick to less than 18 inches because of the modern method of construction we're using, so we have actually gained quite a bit of space inside which is massively important because the footprint of the barn was small to begin with."
Foundations were dug out producing about 300 tonnes of earth and rubble, then the concrete arrived and the site started to progress but by December 2020 the Welsh weather meant a proportion of the time was spent bailing the rainwater out of the site and the stonework was delayed.
By February 2021 the weather had improved but not before the winter temperatures and constant rain had taken their toll on the site, with the remaining front wall severely damaged and having to also be demolished. So little of the barn remained standing.
But there were more disasters on the horizon. The first was a problem with the external stone walls being built from the original barn's stone. It took a stonemason a week to build just a small section of wall. Ben says: "The stone was different colours, the joints between the stones were about double what it had been to begin with and it just looked a mess!"
So the stonemason was ejected from the site and Ben was starting again, adding £1,000 to the budget. Ben says: "If I don't do it, I know that every time I pull the car up here and go through the door I'm going to be like, that bloody wall! I struggle to get to sleep and night and am probably losing friends and alienating people because all I talk about is the barn!"
But as summer approached and the barn was weather tight, Ben hit the worst hurdle yet - running out of money. Ben says: "We've had to stop work about three weeks ago because unfortunately the money pot has run dry.
"So there's no point in me ploughing ahead with the build because I don't want to be in the position where I've got people doing a hard day's work and not being able to pay for it.
"So I'm basically trying to do little jobs that I can do to help and prepare for plumbing going in. I'm trying to keep positive and happy but constantly worrying about when the money is coming through."
The stress became so bad for Ben, with his Cardiff property sale funds gone, his savings gone and his positivity gone, he even texted his estate agent friend to ask how much the barn would fetch on the market in its current condition, as he was thinking about walking away.
But his love for the barn was stronger than the stress and after a summer of waiting the money appeared and, luckily for Ben, Matt could come straight back to site.
Ben says: "I wouldn't have been able to do it without Matt because sometimes when I get a bit wound up about things he says it's fine. I was worried about the business and friends thing but from my point of view it's the best thing I've ever done."
When Ben's barn was finally finished, viewers could see the stunning transformation that had saved this historic building from the brink of total collapse. He says: "I'm so lucky to have this and I just couldn't be happier, I keep pinching myself, I'm just thrilled with it. Wow! This is my house!"
The ground floor is a mainly open-plan space with a kitchen diner and lounge zone within the main section of the barn. This flows into the office and snug space at the opposite end of the ground floor has a step down that makes it feel like a distinct zone, assisted by keeping a section of wall either side of the wide door opening.
The bespoke oak staircase leads to a central, half-galleried landing that then leads to the stylish bathroom and then two double bedrooms, one at either end of the building. Both slumber zones have large roof windows for midnight stargazing.
Being someone who loves to bake, the designer kitchen Ben managed to source online as a bargain ex-display is his favourite spot, even if it does take up almost half of the ground floor. He envisages entertaining friends in the sociable space while he cooks them a meal.
But there is one person who won't be turning up to eat at the barn as Ben has lost someone from his life. Matt is still his BFF but Ben's relationship with Fraser did not survive the build - as the barn build was rebuilt, their relationship crumbled.
Ben says: "I think that's probably one of the costs of the build that I perhaps hadn't anticipated, the strain that it would have put on us. The upshot is that it just wasn't working between us and I've ended up moving in here on my own.
"The letterbox window is a fantastic addition, and every time I look at it I do think of Fraser, so it is kind of bittersweet, a little bit of it, because it was something he came up with and it was such an important thing right from the start."
Ben might have lost his partner but with this barn build he thankfully hasn't lost money too. Ben hasn't done the final adding up but he thinks the total spend with the purchase, land and the build will be around £215k. So with his estate agent friend estimating it would sell quickly if put on the market for near £400k, Ben is over-joyed.
But he's not selling anytime soon, he loves his barn and is excited to be baking and cooking for his friends in the future, and the first one invited over is, of course, marvellous Matt - maybe the most patient builder in Wales.
Ben's barn is part of the series Derelict Rescue, following the stories of intrepid renovators as they tackle the tortuous trials of saving some of the UK's most derelict buildings, made by air tv and currently available to stream on discovery+. And don't miss the best dream homes in Wales, auction properties, renovation stories, and interiors - join the Amazing Welsh Homes newsletter , sent to your inbox twice a week.
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