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The Guardian - UK
The Guardian - UK
Lifestyle

I have letters from a man I fell in love with 50 years ago. Should I return them?

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When I was 22 and just married, I fell in love with an 18-year-old I worked with. He and I spent an emotionally intense but physically chaste summer together and, at the end of it, he went to university and I never saw him again. I am now 72 and trying to tidy my life. I have a bundle of letters and poems he wrote for me that I have kept through many moves. Should I try to contact him (I have no idea where he is) to return these letters? It feels awful to destroy such an outpouring of love, but I do not want my children to have to deal with it.

• When leaving a message on this page, please be sensitive to the fact that you are responding to a real person in the grip of a real-life dilemma, who wrote to Private Lives asking for help, and may well view your comments here. Please consider especially how your words or the tone of your message could be perceived by someone in this situation, and be aware that comments that appear to be disruptive or disrespectful to the individual concerned will be removed.

• If you would like fellow readers to respond to a dilemma of yours, send us an outline of the situation of about 150 words. For advice from Pamela Stephenson Connolly on sexual matters, send us a brief description of your concerns.

• All correspondence should reach us by Wednesday morning. Email: private.lives@theguardian.com (please don’t send attachments).

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