I don't believe in asdfg. There. I've said it. May asdfg strike me dead! Or turn me into a pink stuffed furry animal, or whatever it is that asdfg does. I don't have to know anything about asdfg to know that I don't believe in it, and that it doesn't exist. When I look at all the centuries of futile effort that have gone into asdfg, or suggesting – how dare the asdfgists? – that the word means anything I don't want it to, I feel an extraordinary rage, and then a warm sense of superiority.
Mmmm. Like that. It feels good. I want everyone to feel it. All we need do is hate and fear and despise the people who believe in asdfg. Why should we have to know what they mean by the word? Isn't it enough to recognise it as nonsense?
Of course it's crazy to say that I have any idea of what asdfg means. I don't believe in it. How often do I have to explain this? So I can't argue with people who think it means anything. I just know they're wrong. I believe in reason; and they believe in superstition, and asdfg. So let's hear no more of that nonsense about how anyone who doesn't believe in asdfg secretly has some idea of what the word means and is in that sense an asdfg-ian, if a bad one. We know it's meaningless. We don't believe in it. Why can't you understand?
