When it comes to relationships, it’s rare for a couple to feel no frustrations towards each other surrounding behaviour or even small actions.
Even the most perfect of pairings may find their partner’s habits mildly irritating, be it loud chewing or leaving clothes in a pile on the floor.
While many will vent to their pals with a glass of wine in hand and leave it at that, one woman found an online group to share her annoyances with.
She had found ‘like-minded’ people who also shared their relationship issues, big or small, within the forum.
The anonymous woman found this method of airing her grievances cathartic and more helpful than repeatedly addressing them with him.
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However, she eventually noticed that he had begun working on some of the traits she had disliked.
She initially thought it was a happy coincidence, but soon found out the real reason behind her husband’s transformation.
Writing in a letter to Slate.com’s Dear Prudence advice column, she explained: “A few months ago I joined an online group of like-minded people where we often discuss personal relationship problems.
“I have found that griping about my husband to anonymous people online is a lot better than venting my frustrations at him. Lately my husband has also been really good at changing some of the behaviours that have always driven me up the wall, and now I know why.”
She continued, revealing the mortifying reason behind it being her husband logging in as a member of the group under a fake name and persona.
Adding that he ‘has seen every gripe I ever typed about him’.
While many would ‘fess up at this point, the woman felt torn about whether she should leave the group, confront him or leave it be, as she found it to be a ‘convenient’ way to share her frustrations.
Agony aunt Emily Yoffe, responding as Dear Prudence, said: “I’m sure my husband would love me to follow your lead and post my complaints online instead of expressing them directly to him. Then he’d follow your husband’s example of not discussing any of this with me.”
However, in a scathing addition to her response, she adds: “It’s also possible that you haven’t paid enough attention to the male poster on this site who complains that his hyper controlling witch of a wife doesn’t even appreciate when he makes the changes she wants.”
The agony aunt suggests she goes back to face-to-face communication and informs her online group of his changed ways, before letting him of how grateful she is for his changed behaviour.
And, she also recommends that the wife should come clean to her husband by admitting she knows he’s a member of the group.
Do you agree with this advice? Let us know in the comments below.
