A woman has turned to the internet for advice after a decision she made resulted in her husband flipping out and labelling her “vain” and “selfish” for choosing to prioritize herself over the prospect of having a third child.
Posting to Reddit on r/AITA (Am I The A**hole), a subreddit dedicated to people asking if they’re in the wrong in certain scenarios, the woman explained the situation to the netizens of the site. “This is a really hard post to write,” she begins, “I used to be 260lbs two years ago and I was horribly depressed.”
She has a husband and two children but confesses that her weight was affecting her mental health. However, her husband had stayed by her side as she claims “My husband met me at my worst and loved me anyway.” Fast forward two years and the woman had worked on herself and gotten down from 260lbs to 157lbs.
She admits that the weight loss journey had been difficult and she had received little support from her husband who she claimed was somewhat indifferent to the whole thing, not discouraging her but not exactly encouraging her either. Anyways, she explains that the weight loss has left her with loose skin which has made her self conscious. However, when she told her husband her plans to undergo surgery to remove the loose skin he “flipped out.”
The husband wanted another child
Unfortunately the poster’s husband sounds like a walking red flag. He reveals he wants a third child and accuses his wife of being selfish and vain, “[he] told me I was selfish for choosing my surgery over his wish for another baby.” Apparently the man’s wishes supersede those of his wife’s when it comes to her own body and what’s to be done with it.
The woman tried explaining that she was putting herself first and that her “no” didn’t mean never, it just meant “not now,” however, the husband refused to understand, apparently storming out and telling the whole family that she was “denying him another kid.”
Naturally, the people of Reddit concluded that the woman was not the a**hole in this situation, “you are the one who has to carry another baby not him,” wrote one person, it is her body after all. Others suggested she consider getting the skin removal surgery after having another child if she’s serious about having a third as the pregnancy could stretch the skin again thus negating the results of the procedure.
Either way, it’s her choice at the end of the day and nobody should ever feel pressured by their partner to carry a baby for nine months if they don’t want to. Guilt-tripping her into having a third child is not the way to go.
