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The Guardian - UK
The Guardian - UK
Lifestyle
Lizzie Cernik

How we met after 60: ‘I proposed in New Zealand. Luckily she said yes before the long flight home!’

George and Lesley at Coldingham Sands in the Scottish Borders in October.
George and Lesley at Coldingham Sands in the Scottish Borders in October. Photograph: Supplied image

After Lesley’s husband died in 2007, she never expected to find love again. “We had just celebrated our 35th wedding anniversary when he was diagnosed with incurable cancer,” she says. “I didn’t think I would be widowed so young.” Deep in grief, she spent her time teaching English and helping to look after her grandchildren.

She was an active member of her local church in Edinburgh, and joined the volunteering committee. Although she had seen George at church before, it wasn’t until 2011 that they were properly introduced. “I was also widowed in 2007,” says George. “I retired from my career as a banker and decided to volunteer for the church a few years later.” He and Lesley signed up to help organise outreach events such as concerts and coffee mornings. His first impression of Lesley was that she was a “really nice person who thought before she spoke”.

The following year, they helped organise a secondhand book sale to raise funds for the church. “All the volunteers went out into my garden to discuss it,” he says. “The discussion lasted about 50 minutes, but Lesley and I stayed chatting for hours. That’s when we realised there might be something more between us.” As well as having the church as a common interest, they also both understand the pain of losing a long-term partner. “After the first six months of being widowed, invites from friends tend to dry up,” says George. “For both of us, it felt it was time to restart our social circle.”

The following week, they went for dinner. “At first, it wasn’t romantic,” recalls Lesley, who says that they spent the evening laughing a lot. “I remember I was worried about inviting him in for coffee in case he thought it was a proposition, but luckily he didn’t think that. He was a gentleman.” As they began to spend more time together, their relationship progressed and soon they were officially dating. At Christmas, Lesley was planning to visit her daughter in New Zealand for six weeks. “One day, George was there while I was talking to her on the phone and she suggested I bring him along.” Although he already had plans to spend Christmas with his mother, he decided to join Lesley for New Year.

Lesley and George on their wedding day.
Lesley and George on their wedding day. Photograph: Supplied image

On their final night in New Zealand, George asked Lesley to marry him. “Luckily she said yes, because we had a long flight home,” he laughs. Although it was a surprise to Lesley, she says it made sense. “We are both religious, so marriage is important to us in a serious relationship,” she says.

They tied the knot in May 2014 in their church, surrounded by their friends and family. “I have four children and eight grandchildren, who George has inherited,” says Lesley. “They were a bit protective at first but once they got to know him they loved him – and the grandchildren absolutely adore him.”

Having never had children with his first wife, George initially found becoming part of such a big family a bit daunting. “It was all new but it was great fun and I love them all to bits,” he says.

The couple now have a dog and love going on long walks. They also enjoy reading, going to orchestral concerts, dining out and travelling, as well as spending time with friends and family.

Lesley loves how dependable her husband is. “One good thing about starting a relationship when you’re older is that you’re less busy juggling young children and a mortgage. Life slows down, so you can spend more time with each other,” she says. “I admire the strength that George has. He’s also very intelligent and well read – he’s knowledgable about everything.”

George appreciates Lesley’s honesty. “If I ever do anything that isn’t what she is expecting, I know she’ll tell me and we can talk about it. To me, that’s what love is about – an absolute trust in the other person, and that’s exactly what I have in Lesley.”

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