The reactions you get to saying you’re doing Oslo, one of the most expensive cities in the world, “on the cheap,” are a lot like those you’d get if you announced your plans to fund your own space agency, or build a malaria lab in your upstairs bedroom. Friends, colleagues, even curious passersby, will affect not mere dubiousness, but wild, mocking scepticism.
Undeterred, or perhaps inspired, I set out to see what could be done on an Oslo day trip, without resorting to remortgaging my hair or selling my trousers for scrap. Landing in Oslo airport at 10am for my 12-hour jaunt in the city, I decided my first cost-saving measure would be to buy an Impulskort, which allowed me 24 hours’ travel on the city’s trains, trams, buses, certain waterways and – most pleasingly of all – a speedy shuttle train to and from the airport to the city centre, all for 246 kroner (roughly £23). Satisfied that, whatever else happened, I wouldn’t have to flee my Nordic debtors on foot, I took a short trip on the immaculate airport train and began my adventure in earnest.
Twenty-five minutes later, I arrived at Oslo’s central station right in front of more than a few free activities, and took a pleasant walk around the majestic fjord-side harbour. The city’s opera house is an ideal space to take in the glory of Oslo by walking up the sloping marble crevasse on its side, a rare landmark that’s roughly 80% ramp. Ascending to the height of its auspicious roof gives you an impressive view over the entire city. Two landmarks down, zero kroner spent, I smugly set off for the flurry of museums located a few miles away by train, in the forested peninsula of Bygdøy.
There, at the splendid Viking Ship Museum, I learned how Norwegians once travelled the world, making millions by raiding and pillaging as far as the Mediterranean and Middle East. This so enriched them that they buried beautiful objects of great value with their fallen dead, some spectacular examples of which are collected here among the wonderfully restored, full-size longboats. Of course, the Vikings stopped all the travelling when they realised they could achieve the same effect without leaving the house, by simply getting the rest of the world to come visit, and charging them £4.60 for a can of coke on arrival.
Joking aside, when it comes to cultural attractions, Oslo isn’t that eye-wateringly expensive in the grand scheme. I visited several museums while I was there, and they were uniformly excellent. The Fram Museum, in particular, represents great value for £11, with its innovatively designed attractions, installations and video pieces, and the sheer mammoth scale of its incredible centrepiece: Roald Amundsen’s exploration ship, the Fram, complete with explorable cabins, store rooms and top deck. While the Viking Ships Museum was certainly smaller for its £9 asking price, its ticket also grants you free admission to the Historical Museum in the city centre.
One pleasant way to find your way back is by waterbus. For around £5, it will take you from Bygdøy to the opera house and give you a nice 20-minute trip round the sights of the fjord. It’s also a good spot to indulge in a few quick rounds of PriceSpotting, the game in which you and fellow travellers try and one-up each other on best bits of value you’ve encountered. For fellow passengers, Alf and Chris Saville, visiting from England, it was the medieval castle, Akershus Fortress, on the Oslo harbour front; free to enter, pleasantly capacious, and filled with interesting corners to snoop around in.
Stopping at Sentrum will take you in the direction of the Nobel Peace Center (£11) and the Historical Museum. This will also take you past some cheaper eating options in the form of street food vans offering everything from fish and chips (£8-10 for a hearty serving) to Thai food (£9 for pad thai or red curry, or five spring rolls for £5).
A little further from existing tramlines is Oslo’s crown tourist jewel, the Vigeland exhibit in Frogner Park. The exhibit comprises 212 statues made by Gustav Vigeland, almost all of which are of naked men, women and children in a dizzying array of poses and positions, all seemingly conceived deliberately to make those with less Scandinavian attitudes to nudity feel decidedly square. The whole thing is vast, mesmerising, and entirely free. Less well known is the mausoleum of his brother, Emmanuel. Housed in a brick building that’s open for a few hours each week, it showcases his distinctly dark and brooding paintings depicting just about every sin imaginable. Very much the Solange of the Vigeland brothers, Emmanuel’s works are less famous but carry a frisson of cool which Gustav’s may never attain. A trip inside will cost about £5, and serve as an edgier alternative to his brother’s nudes.
It’s true that being in a place this expensive does risk making you money obsessed. Even the world’s least materialistic person will find a world where a beer costs £11 fascinating. It’s mind-blowing to imagine Norwegians anywhere else, say, ordering a lukewarm beer on London’s Southbank, before turning to their partner as they fork over £7 and saying, “Wøw, Bjørn, look how cheap everything is here.” But, in the end, I made it back for my return flight that evening, having spent roughly £60 in 12 hours, taking in four museums, a gigantic sculpture park, an opera house, a beautiful harbour walk, a boat trip and delightful interactions with the city’s locals, most of whom have the sunny, easygoing mien of either heavy metal roadies or tennis coaches.
Only once did I get into anything resembling a harsh word, when a woman near a public bathroom turned to complain about the price. “15 kroner!” she said, in bemusement. “Wow” I replied, joining in. “Crazy!” “Yes,” she said, although now scowling ever so slightly, “but you have to also remember that it’s very clean.” I forgave her for unintentionally levelling a vague accusation as to the cleanliness of the toilets I’m used to, for I had misstepped. It’s clearly one thing for a local to complain about the prices, but visitors should perhaps mind their Ps and Øs.
Way to go
Seamas flew Ryanair to Oslo Gardermoen airport from about £20 with Ryanair. For Impulskort travelcard information, visit ruter.no. For tourist info and cultural attractions, see visitoslo.com, which has an Oslo on a Budget site with deals and offers. If you do choose to stay, the 3-star P-Hotel Oslo has dorm beds from £29 a night
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