Daily life in prison and jail isn’t quite what you imagine it to be. While some movies and TV shows manage to capture the essence quite well, they still leave some things out. If you want to get the full factual scoop, you need to hear it from a variety of people who have been behind bars.
Curious internet users took to threads on Quora to find out what prison life is actually like, and a whole host of former inmates were willing to share their experiences. Scroll down to real their stories, including the biggest challenges they faced.
#1
I served 18 years straight. I'd say somewhere around the 7 or 8 year mark my view of the situation changed. It was no longer prison, it was just my life. Nothing ever changed. Every day was the same. You get in a never changing routine and before you know it 5 years go by. Then 10, then 15. The real world becomes a fantasy. Something you see on TV, or pictures in magazine, but it's no longer real. One day you look in the mirror and your hair is receding, and it's turning gray, in your mind your socially stunted and in a lot of ways child like, but you're old. I went in at 18 and came out a 37 year old man who didn't know how to do anything. I'd never used a cell phone or computer. I'd never driven a car or filed my taxes. The world was too big, too loud, too fast. My second day out my sister took me to Walmart and I had a panic attack and had to go outside and sit in the car by myself. I could make a tattoo gun out of an electric razor, boil water with an extension cord, and sits for months on end by myself in a room with a sink, concrete bunk and metal toilet without breaking a sweat. But I couldn't hold a job, operate any electronics without help, or go to Walmart without freaking the fuck out. I didn't know how to cook, or how to pay a bill. I sat home by myself for months, afraid to go anywhere or talk to people. A big part of me wanted to be back in prison where things made sense, where I thrived.
I've been out for over 5 years now, and while I've learned to do a lot of things, it's still not easy. I dream alot of being in prison. Where's it's easy. No responsibility. And believe it or not, less stress and anxiety. I've been in institutions my whole life, since I was a little kid. Foster homes, group homes, treatment centers, juvenile detentions. It's what I know. It's where I'm comfortable. I don't know if that will ever change.
Image credits: Ant
‘Jail’ and ‘prison’ might be used interchangeably colloquially and in popular culture, but they are very different. In the United States, ‘jail’ mainly refers to short-term holding facilities. There, people typically wait for their trials and sentence, or they serve out their sentences that are shorter than a year. Jails are generally under the jurisdiction of cities, local districts, or counties.
Meanwhile, ‘prison’ refers to long-term holding facilities meant for people convicted of more serious crimes. They are under the jurisdiction of states and federal governments.
So, talking about daily life in jail and prison has very different connotations. In the latter case, you’re incarcerated for an incredibly long amount of time. It takes a different, deeper kind of toll on you.
#2
To some people it's probably pretty hard. Being away from everything you know and love. For me. Being out it harder than being in. I have days where I crave the inside. It's easier than living out here as a second class citizen. I have been outta lock up for 7 years have yet to find a job that I can perform and make a living off of. I cannot find decent housing for myself and if it wasn't for my Dad and my son I would be on the streets commiting crimes just to eat. So, how hard is it really to do time in prison? That's a cake walk compared to living in society as a convicted felon. This is how I see it anyway. Not everybody will have the same opinion. This opinion is just from my experience.
Image credits: Rhonda Heyman
#3
My day normally begins at a quarter to five. As I lay in the top bunk enjoying the soon to be interrupted silence. I take advantage of the peaceful moment by praying thanking God for being alive and for being in good health. After praying I jump down to do my morning ritual of washing my face and brushing my teeth. I then proceed to putting on my work clothes. Once all that stuff is completed I make up my bunk and grab my cd player to listen to some smooth jazz music.
Some mornings I make a cup of coffee or drink a cup tea while waiting on the officers to release every one for breakfast. After grabbing my lunch for the day I have about forty minutes before I have to go to work. So I return to the cell to brush my teeth again and watch some news on my television. Seven o'clock I'm at work in the maintenance department. Sometimes we load trucks with unusable metals and recyclable aluminum. For the most part my work days are easy. I have plenty of time to study and read.
At one o'clock I'm off work. Sometimes I have to stop by the education building to take care of some business issues, so I stop by there for a few minutes. Usually from there I try to get my shower before all the guys come in from the yard.
From two o'clock to five o'clock I study. Dinner time is right after that and I'm off to class again. Normally at eight o' clock I'm back in the cell. I have just about one hour to watch something on television. By ten o'clock I'm exhausted and I prepare to go to sleep and start over again the next day. That is my typical day in prison.
Image credits: Joseph Demerson
As per Verywell Mind, being incarcerated takes a serious toll on your mental health. For one, you lose your sense of purpose when you’re behind bars.
You can also experience the loss of your identity, which can be very confusing. Suddenly, you’re no longer known for the profession, talents, skills, or knowledge you had on the outside.
Furthermore, you also have to deal with the reality of being separated from your loved ones. While your family and friends can sometimes visit you in prison, you no longer have the option to be involved in their daily lives. If you have children, you’re not a part of their growing up. If you have older relatives, you can’t take care of them directly. It’s isolating.
#4
I can't speak for everyone but I know for myself, I felt like I was less than human. I have done a decent amount of time, couple of years in prison and about 1.5 in the county jail.
I honestly had no idea what I was about to endure. I had lived a sheltered life for the most part. I quickly learned life can be cruel.
When I entered the county jail, they put me in a cell that was extremely over crowded and loud. It was horrible. Once they closed the solid iron door, I was locked in a room with no windows or anything. They only opened the door to feed us, give meds or to grab an inmate or put one in. I thought this was bad but I didn't know what was coming..
I finally made it to the state prison. As soon as I got there they chopped off my long beautiful hair to be even with the bottom of my ears. Then they told me to get completely naked. There was 10–12 other other ladies standing around. I felt completely sick and embarrassed. Nonetheless I had to obey them. I got naked and searched while everyone else watched. Then they gave me some state issued clothes and sent me to my assigned bed. I got to a point where I had to use the restroom. When I walked in the bathroom I instantly wanted to cry. The toilets were lined up side by side, very close together and not a lick of privacy. Same goes for the showers. Everyone got to see and smell everyone else doing personal things. Then the way the guards treated me, made me feel like I was nothing but a number. I was not human. I was told when to eat, sleep, and wake. I had no free choice. I had to wake up in the middle of the night many times while they did surprise searches, only to have everything I own, thrown on the dirty floor and gone through.
It was pure hell and humiliation. However it worked as far as making me never want to come back. I will never understand how some don't learn and keep going back.
Image credits: Latisha Duke Hardin
#5
In prison there is nothing soft to rest on or against at any time ever. Every amenity, privilege, luxury, and possession you enjoyed is gone. Your mobility and agency, the ability to go where you want and do what you want is gone. Your access to electrical devices and the internet is gone. Access to phones is restricted. At any given time your tiny living space and meager possessions can be ransacked and trashed. You can be awakened in the dead of night and forced to strip naked while your cell is bring searched.
Your living amongst anywhere from 50 to 200 inmates in a stone and metal enclosure that echoes and carries every shout, curse, or scream to every wall and room. There are gangs, clicks, and alliances to keep note of. Sit in the wrong place and you could invite a conflict.
Worst of all, you're wrestling with the guilt of your crime, the guilt of being separated from those who depend on you, the shame of disappointing your family, the helplessness to being any kind of influence in anyone's life. You can't even provide for yourself. You are completely dependent on the state for food, shelter and clothing. This is a demoralizing state. Your only value is now as livestock in the world's biggest human trafficking operation. And that's exactly how you are treated.
Yes prison is hard. But human beings, we are able to endure incredible hardships. Compared to the free world where there's so many dangers and threats and ways to fail or fuck up that it's a miracle that we make it each day. In prison your life is so simple and you are removed from that danger, you're so safe you'd probably survive a war.. prison life is so simple and easy it becomes hard to bear. If you ever seen an animal that's been kept in a cage for months and months, when it used to run free. Look into its empty hopeless eyes and that's what prison feels like.
Image credits: Chris Scroggins
#6
I have friends who have spent time in prison, a couple of them have deliberately re-offended (nothing causing physical harm) to get back inside. The time spent in prison is not too bad apparently, boredom being the main problem, that and the theft of belongings by other prisoners. There is a myth about the rehabilitation of prisoners in this country, but from the experiences that I have been told about, it is simply that - a myth. Education is there for those who cannot read and write at all, but that’s about it. Training for real-life jobs is almost non-existent. Those I know who have spent time in prison say that the sentence is not too bad, it’s when you get out that the problems start.
In the UK if your original sentence is over 4 years long the sentence remains “unspent” for the rest of your life, effectively a life sentence as almost every job application form has the question “Do you have any unspent convictions?” and you never get any further. Even the ones who have signed up to “Ban the box”, (meaning they don’t ask the question in the initial process) will ask the question later. Add to that, there are only 2 or 3 insurers out there who will offer any kind of insurance to anyone with unspent convictions meaning that car insurance so someone who went to prison paying £200 a year for a nice car could easily be faced with £4000/year charge. I witnessed this with a friend who called one of the specialist companies and when he queried it he was told “Well, you shouldn’t have done what you did then should you?”.
So no, in the UK prison life is not hard, but life after prison is made even harder.
Image credits: John Vincent
On top of that, there’s the environmental stress that you now have to shoulder. “Concrete walls, little natural light, and a lack of overall stimulation can take a serious toll on mental health. People in prison have few ways to relieve stress. And their sterile environment is likely to fuel boredom, which can be quite stressful in itself,” Verywell Mind explains. This environment, to be clear, affects prison staff as well, not just the inmates.
Then there’s the frequent exposure to violence when you’re behind bars. You can witness fights during breaks and meal times, and see violence occur between guards and prisoners. This leads to emotional distress and can impact how you adjust to life outside of prison when you’re free.
You can, yourself, become a victim of aggression, too. And if you end up in solitary confinement due to disciplinary or safety issues, it’s even worse for your health. These conditions can exacerbate any mental health problems that you already have. Moreover, you can develop mental health issues as a result of extreme isolation, such as anxiety, paranoia, insomnia, aggression, and depression.
#7
To be honest, doing the time wasn’t a problem. It became life. Don't get me wrong, it sucked in general but everything became normal. Some guys would be bitter for years and not except it, but for me I lived it like I always lived and made the best of a shitty situation. The hard part came when I got out. I turned 30 and 40 in the penitentiary and during those years, the world changed. It's been 7 years and I still have a hard time texting. And that's just an example. The hardest part about doing time for me started when I was released
Image credits: DH Red
#8
Very bad if you don't like people watching you.
Very bad food and no beer to wash it down.
Get used to your stuff being ransacked by the guards and frequent strip searches.
Not trusting anyone because there are always people who will take advantage of you if they can.
Even if it's just a simple barbed wire fence, you're still an animal living in a cage.
Image credits: Rick Wright
#9
The day begins with a guard shouting “Count” over a loudspeaker. Inmates must stand to be counted. This can happen as early as 5:30AM. Sometimes they're allowed to go back to sleep. Depending on the level of security (max has cells, med typically has cubicles), they can get up and go to the bathroom, get coffee in the communal area (possibly equipped with a coffee maker, microwave if they're lucky, and sink) or they start work. Work can be preparing breakfast in the mess hall kitchen, landscaping duties, cleaning bathrooms, laundry, or ‘factory' work such as making clothing for a company, to name a few. Work may be mandatory for able-bodied people and pay is anywhere from $.03/hr to $3/hr. Sometimes big companies will utilize prisoners to make their products. Essentially, slave labor. (Prisons are good business for big companies.) Breakfast is typically called by 7AM, or earlier, and they'll be called down by dorms or cell blocks. They get limited time to line up for food and sit and eat it. Sometimes 10 mins total. The food is awful and inmates can opt out if they want. They may do this if they have their own food. In some facilities, food (canned and vaccuum sealed, never homemade) can be sent in by family members. Or prisoners can purchase food from commissary (the store). Options are limited and $ for this has to come from their piddly pay or people outside who kindly sent it in. The rest of their day can be programs (such as school, trade training, anger management, drug+alcohol counselling), free time in the yard, gym, TV room, or common area (where they can play cards, Dominoes, chess), or they're stuck in their cells where they hopefully have a book and crossword puzzles! Phone times may be scheduled or can be used any time in the day. There are typically 3 or 4 phones for 60 inmates to share. Day after day of what sounds like easy leisure time is actually monotonous and lonely and loud. Groups and gangs form, enemies are made, revenge is sought, sexual frustration is rampant, fights (verbal or physical) are constant. Personal safety is always an issue. Finding ways to protect oneself is always a focus. Finding something to occupy the mind is always a challenge. Lunch may be called around 11:30AM, and of course, periodic counts will be called throughout the day. If it's visiting day, hopefully they have a visitor! There may be a church service or other religious ceremony usually in a makeshift chapel. And then after another canned or boxed dinner on plastic plates, it may be shower time. Showers are usually timed to a few minutes at most. (Some facilities allow showering at any time of day). Privacy is non-existent for shitting and showering and everything else for that matter. Lights out by 11 at the latest. Then they try to sleep to the sound of talking, snoring, farting, crying, toilets flushing, and to the smell of cigarettes, weed, K2, and whatever else burning, and to the fear of being attacked. A deep sleep is unlikely. (So, for those who oppose school programs and other activities for inmates because they feel prisoners shouldn't be afforded such “luxuries” while being punished, believe me, life in prison is punishment enough. Preparing them for reintegration is in everyone's best interest.)
Image credits: Katie O'Connor
According to one study, mental health problems are “highly prevalent” in prisons. “ Incarcerated persons generally come from disadvantaged backgrounds and are living under extraordinary conditions while in prison. Their healthcare needs are complex compared to the general population.”
Some of the main barriers to seeking mental health help among incarcerated individuals include distrust in the system, challenges with the referral routines, worries about negative consequences, and perceived limited access to mental healthcare. These barriers might be reduced by providing information about mental health and available services, initiating outreaching mental health services, and integrating mental health interventions into treatment programs.
What’s also vital is how prison officers and healthcare personnel respond to prisoners reporting mental distress.
#10
There are times you can busy yourself with the chores of the day and kind of forget or put things off, but for the most part, for me, it was brutal and devestating. I watched my late teens, my twenties, and thirties vanish as I struggled to survive inside. I have seen more violence than the vast majority of the planet and it was my day to day life. The stress can be overwhelming at times and other times it is just plain excruciatingly boring. I hope no one has to experience what I went through for over 25 years. It wiped me out, defeated me time and again, crush my spirit and the will to live over and over again, and I still am not certain how I made it…
smile livin’ ain’t all that bad
#11
It’s probably different for every person. For me, at the age of 70+ and never having even known anyone that had been in jail, much less prison, it was both frightening and a bit of adventure. I believe whatever life throws our way, the mind can either give in to fear or rise up to stay strong. I’ve had a lot of challenges over the year, and have always felt the mind is the greatest weapon against obstacles which we all face in our lives.
Image credits: Reed Black
#12
If its your first time in prison especially a max prison and you have a lot of time to do it can be hard for a while. The best you can do is accept the fact you are in prison and deal with it . You may and probably will see bad things . You may see prisoners being stabbed, you may or may not see guards beating prisoners . Hell it may be you. These days its likely you wont see it You will have to get used to prison rules , some which are stupid in my opinion. But it is what it is . You put yourself there ( unless you truly are innocent) Deal with it. I do not mean to sound mean , but if you are gong to prison the quicker you accept that fact and that you are in a different world the better you will be
Which of these stories left the biggest impression on you? Have you ever been incarcerated? What were the biggest challenges that you had to overcome during your time behind bars? Have you ever worked at an incarceration facility before? What was it like?
This is a sensitive topic, but if you feel like sharing your experiences, feel free to do so in the comments at the bottom of this post.
#13
I spent 17 years trapped in a cell. Prison is a second by second assault on the soul. It is like being trapped under a steel and brick umbrella and you feel as if you are choking in silent pain. Each day is an echo of the day before; routine, with the unsettling fact that violence can pop off at any second, at anytime. It’s all depressing
#14
Routine. That’s the best way to describe it. Because every prisoner follows a routine and it is different from inmate to inmate.
If an inmate is smart, they’ll spend their time doing constructive things and making the most of their time.
Some plan their routine around their prison jobs, others around working out. Things I did were: study, read, exercise (walked the track 2 hours a day), play Ultimate Frisbee on the yard, play D&D, watch TV, teach classes, do my prison orderly job, type e-mails for people as a hustle, cook, listen to music, play tickets (sports gambling), painted, etc.
Image credits: Garland Ragland
#15
No solid answer here, the fact that not everybody is going through the same thing while incarcerated and said individuals will endure various amounts of situations inside of a penetentary, majority depending on how you carry yourself, being respectful, and minding your own business. All in all, some people will call it he'll, others call it home, and all of whats in between. Just depends on which inmate you ask. For me, too be honest, it's fucking trash. The whole Texas judicial system is something you do not want to get on the wrong side of, none the less prison is prison but if your mind is free, you can be free anywhere.
#16
Jail sucks, and it's boring. The day starts with breakfast. Around 6 am. Typically boiled eggs and oatmeal, milk, decafe coffee, every meal is served with 2 slices of bread where I was.
After breakfast most people go back to bed. You have to be on your bunk in open dorm, or in your cell. Shift changes is around 7 am, then count time.
After count you are usually free to move around until lunch. You can watch tv, read a book, shower, play cards, draw, color, write letters etc. There's a small rec yard, people walk in circles for hours including myself others play basketball.
Lunch is served, crapy sandwiches, apple or oranges, a cookie, salt peter koolaid. Then back on your bunk or in the cell while trustees clean up. Sometimes that chore rotates and each inmate takes a turn cleaning. There is usually another count time after lunch. Then you have a few more hours free time before dinner.
Dinner is served, its gross and smells good at the same time. Then back to lock down for clean up and shift change. There's usually a Church Service a couple nights per week otherwise you have more free time to kill before lights out at 11. Guess what happens next… count time, sleep, more counting while you sleep and repeat.
Image credits: Mary Livey
#17
The average day, for the average person in prison, is either “normal program” or “locked down”
If on locked down, due to recent violence, foggy weather, rumors of violence etc., you are in your cell the entire day. Write letters, read, draw, exercise (calisthenics), talk to others on the tier etc. are pretty common. If you have a TV, a radio and/or a cellmate then you have more options but that’s pretty much it. Your meals are brought to the cell and you’ll get a brief shower in the building every few days but likely no visits or phone calls.
If on normal program your average day is likely the same as it was the week prior etc. etc. If you have a job you go to that but it’s never more than 8 hours. If the yard is open while you are not at work, you will get some time outside to mingle, work out, play handball/basketball etc. If the dayroom is open while you aren’t working you can use the phone, watch the communal TV, get a haircut maybe etc. Otherwise, when not in work or the dayroom/yard you will be in your cell except for traveling to the chow hall for breakfast and dinner (some places have a hot lunch but usually it comes in a bag you get at breakfast).
If you don’t have a work or school assignment you will probably have limited access to the yard and dayroom and be in your cell more often. Some people elect not to spend all the available time outside the cell and thus live as though they are on locked down.
Notable events are laundry once a week and canteen once a month. Packages from the streets are usually quarterly. Most places have weekend visits but some offer them on certain weekdays as well.
Keep in mind, if you are in solitary confinement your day looks similar to being locked down but you will have outside access (restricted) about 10 hrs a week. If you live in a dorm environment your day looks different than one who is in a 1 or 2 person cell for obvious reasons. Lower security prisons offer more time outside the cell while higher security ones offer less. For example minimum security often get to go outside whenever they want during the day and early evening while maximum security have a set few hours during the day in which the yard is opened but you can only go in or out at certain intervals.
These questions are notoriously difficult because prisons and people doing time in them vary widely. The consistent theme is that the people who navigate prison the best develop a routine and we can have an exaggerated investment in those routines being consistent. If dinner is at 430p and it doesn’t come by 435p you will encounter a lot of highly agitated people, perhaps even unreasonable, but it is because we connect to routines and fidelity to them is the one way we have a semblance of power or control. I don’t dictate when dinner comes, but if I know when it is coming I find comfort/stability in that power..when it is late my whole frame of reference for life might as well be jeopardized.
#18
Depending on the area you're in it can be vastly different. There are a few things that will be constant.
You'll be scared. I don't care how tough you are. In an unfamiliar place where all sights, smells and sounds around are new, not sure of your pending future.
You will change. Your diet, perspective, attitude and habits will be severely altered. Not always for the worst. You will have all the time in the world to work out, read, cry and regret every decision you ever made.
You'll adapt quickly. That is, if you aren't a little… you know.
Don't complain. Be respectful but don't make too many friendly gestures; be cool. Pray. Join a class and get a job.
DO NOT BORROW ANYTHING! you'll meet truly friendly people and you'll meet truly evil people that have nothing but time. “Don't take the snickers bar on your bunk”
#19
It can very intimidating. Maybe not from the fear of other inmates, but the process of coming into the prison environment, being stripped completely naked in front of everyone, made to shower and use the bathroom in front of everyone, and have all your private things exposed.
Image credits: Conor Dugan
#20
Let us start .
A bail rang loudly in predawn which means that we have to get up.
People start to visit lavatories in dorms and brushing their teeth .
Mean while A correctional officer visits the ward and tell all person to sit down and count their heads
After completing the counting and finding it ok he allows every one to come out in yards .
People start to stretch their body to make it active for the day after night long inactivity.They look forward to meet their acquaintance/friend from other dorms to enjoy chit chat.
Morning tea arrives within one hour of morning unlock .They queued to help distribution and enjoy their tea in yards while moving in groups.
Morning hours passes very quickly with sunshine and cool . In between breakfast of some snacks/bread are also gulped in yards. Now feeling energetic to face the day.
Convict prisoners are now moved to take their work /duty . Prisoners having court attendance moved to their fixed place.Rest went in to their designated dorms and locked up.
Just before noon ,it is time to take bath and to finish some some laundry work.Now they are allowed to come out in wards and after making themselves fresh ,wait for lunch distribution starts.. It is tough task to prepare and distribute thousands of lunch packets one by one.
Prisoner have freedom to have their lunch either at dining place/at some convenient place.
Lunch takes time .They are counted again .After it it is time to take some short afternoon nap. It is three ‘o'clock in afternoon. Sun is lowered in horizon and slanting rays are falling on earth.
Prison come out again in yards.Now it is free time and sport time.. They have to brash up for the night lock up too. They enter into their barracks by sunset . Dinner is handed over to them after this one by one. They are at liberty to eat it at their suitable time at night with in their barracks.
Let them enjoy some news at Television first.Entertainment channel are there as night deepens.It is more than 10 PM. It is time to go to bed.
Early to sleep and early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise.
P.S.- This is the daily routine of Under trail prisoners in Indian Prisons/Correctional Homes.
#21
The violence in prisons is usually based on what level prison your talking about. A level one camp type prison obviously is apt to have less violence due to the shorter terms inmates are looking at mostly. A level 4 prison however tends to have a lot more violence because the inmates are facing long term prison sentences if not life, and the prison politics are taken way more serious. It’s the higher level prisons that believe it or not tend to have guards who are much more mellow. The reason being if they treat inmates like they do in the lower level prisons they’d likely face getting stabbed themselves. The majority of the violence in any prison is usually gang related or due to unpaid debts or disrespect. Good luck and hope this helps.
#22
It all depends on the individual who lands in prison. For the uninitiated, a true nightmarish culture shock is the beginning of a completely alien world. Primal mode is the best way to function. Forget everything you know that has to do with compassion, empathy, sympathy, humanity, or any semblance of such emotions and feelings. If you're strong and wise, you can turn them off for years without suffering any permanent damage.
There you are, standing in front of the most violent alpha males sniffing at you for the slightest hint of a fear pheromone. You are at your most vulnerable on your first day because you do have not a clue about the world you just stepped into. It's obvious to us regulars who are third or fourth-time offenders that you're rolling in with pudding in your drawers. That look in your eyes says it all.
On the other hand, for those of us who were State raised in its glorious institutions and state facilities, it's like a family reunion. It's like one's second home for some, primary for others. No exaggeration whatsoever.
What you are in for and how you carry yourself will determine the future for you from that point on. Don't join prison gangs. Always run with your people. Don't gamble or get into debt. Do not ever lie to a fellow convict. Do not touch what is not yours. Do not vouch for anyone. Don't mess with homosexuals. Respect the prison politics. Do not talk to the guards. Keep your eyes and ears open and mouth shut; you don't know anything didn't see a damn thing.
A prison is a unique place for everyone. What it was like for me was my experience, no one could ever truly understand it, no matter how much of my experience choose to share. No one could have ever walked in my shoes because they were made for my feet to do so in. Many say prison is hell and what have you. Perhaps that was the path laid for them to walk and experience. For some, it was a one-way ticket, for whatever reason. My experience was ‘Monastic’, despite the violence, death, madness, and all wickedness that abound. I live in peace, mentally and emotionally, as best as I can; and more, if needs be.
#23
Long periods of mundane boredom interrupted by short lived extremely violent attacks with a little bit of innocent fun here and there. You take the good where you can and blind yourself to the evil all around you. You learn to control your shock and disgust at the way the guards assault inmates, lest you get your femur broken. (Yes really I saw a guy have the thickest bone in his body broken by screws who were “restraining him while he resisted”) . You have to learn to look the other way even when your moral compass is screaming about the injustices all around you.
#24
I was 42, jobless and homeless with two kids 11 and 12 years old. We were homeless, because I found out my ex was cheating. My girls and I mostly lived in our vehicle. No one, not friends nor family would help us. Simply being told to read our bible and pray. I was at my breaking point and drinking heavily. Once I saw blue and red lights behind me, I lost it, knowing it would be a felony DWI and CPS was taking my girls. I resisted and tried to grab the cop's gun. Yelling repeatedly to just shoot me. When I got to jail, I was put in restraint chair for 4 hours, then put in a single cell, where I tore my jail pants. When asked why, I responded that I was going to hang myself. I was transferred that night to the state hospital, where I remained for 6 weeks. I was transferred back to county jail because my court date was approaching, not because I was well. Upon getting there, I was put in a single cell in the infirmary, with a trusted at my door 24/7. I was taunted and made fun of by the guards. I continued to self harm and would be put back in the restraint chair for 4 hours each time. When we went to court, I was sentenced to 7 months state jail, although it was my 1st offense. I was bused to Plain State jail and put in general population and was given a whole months supply of blood pressure medication. I was mentally unstable and scared shirtless. I'd never been to jail before. The other girls were nice to me, although I saw them constantly fighting amongst each other. The guards, on the other hand, weren't. I'd get yelled and cussed at regularly. I couldn't handle it anymore. I overdosed on the blood pressure medication. I was told that I wouldn't be returning there and was sent to the hospital, where I was in ICU for a week. When I recovered, I was sent to a psychiatric jail. The guards there, were the worst. I was in a single cell, where they would stick their hand through the slot and pull my hair. Angry, I started banging my head. Three guards shoved their way into my cell and drug me down the hall by my hair. They cut my clothes off and restrained me to a bed. Then, while two guards watched, the other two guards took turns punching me in the face repeatedly. All I could do is lie there and take it. Another 4 hours. For the remainder of my sentence, I was mocked and jeered. I thought it surreal the day I was getting released. Nothing smelled better than the smell of the grass and nothing felt better than the wind on my face. It's all a terrible, distance memory now. I don't think anyone deserved to be treated like I was. I know I'll never go back.
#25
You can always tell when someone has done real time.i would add .it's long borrowing never changing time until it gets crazy for awhile then back to boring..I lived Walmart I just can't make decisions easily.also after that 7 or 8 I stopped dreaming of being feel
..if a girl was in my dream I was in a field trip to another prison with girls I adjusted quick but,after 5 years out it hit me i was old and just working like another prison.stopoed doing stuff.still hate lines,crowds,and all technology gives me anxiety.and I go into instant fight or flight feelings with cops or anyone raising their voice.its true more stress out here.but more stress inside as to will I have to get into fight over some b.s. like death at table,or a disrespectful stare
..crazy.thats why no one should do over five years.if it's that serious it's 5,life,or we will be your neighbor and if my my neighbor ever calls cops on me it's gonna be problems.if I don't feel I warranted that.so to neighbors…talk to your neighbor before you start calling dog pound or cops.chames are we will respect that.if not your dealing with a lunatic.
