How extreme is your life? Take the test

Is this your morning commute? Photograph: Roberto Mettifogo/Getty

1. 

   A friend asks if you’d like to go for a bike ride at the weekend. Do you …

   1. Accept, but suggest upgrading to a car ride?

      Add a point in A

   2. Accept and propose a nice leisurely 60km?

      Add a point in B

   3. Tell them how you built all four of your bikes until they remember that, actually, they already have plans?

      Add a point in C

2. 

   What is a carabiner?

   1. A crab-flavoured cordial.

      Add a point in A

   2. Something you use to connect ropes and harnesses.

      Add a point in B

   3. Something you use as a nosering.

      Add a point in C

3. 

   What would be a typical breakfast for you on a weekday?

   1. A choc ice.

      Add a point in A

   2. Half a wholemeal bagel with peanut butter.

      Add a point in B

   3. Fourteen raw egg whites.

      Add a point in C

4. 

   Where are your metal pins?

   1. In my pin cushion.

      Add a point in A

   2. In my collarbone.

      Add a point in B

   3. Hang on, I’ll just go and get the x-rays…

      Add a point in C

5. 

   How do you get to work every morning?

   1. Segway, car, Segway, train, Segway, lift, Segway, desk.

      Add a point in A

   2. A quick triathlon.

      Add a point in B

   3. Wingsuit.

      Add a point in C

6. 

   What did you do with your children during the summer holidays?

   1. Cinema, Minecraft, board games, a bit of everything really.

      Add a point in A

   2. Camping, swimming, Pokemon Go.

      Add a point in B

   3. Left them naked in a forest with a knife.

      Add a point in C

7. 

   You agree to run a charity marathon with some of your colleagues. How do you prepare for the race?

   1. Hire a bear suit, show it round the office laughing, then pay some kid to put it on and run in your place.

      Add a point in A

   2. Controlled diet, 10km daily run, building up the distance as the race approaches.

      Add a point in B

   3. Stockpile clean urine samples.

      Add a point in C

8. 

   What does the acronym Base jumping stand for?

   1. Best Attempted by Someone Else

      Add a point in A

   2. Building Antenna Span Earth

      Add a point in B

   3. Bugger All Safety Equipment

      Add a point in C

9. 

   How often do you go skydiving?

   1. About as often as I go snowboarding.

      Add a point in A

   2. Most weekends.

      Add a point in B

   3. I’m skydiving right now.

      Add a point in C

10. 

    What do you use a GoPro for?

    1. Oh, so many things, I lose count. I don’t know how I ever lived without whatever it is. It’s a camera, right?

       Add a point in A

    2. Recording mountain bike routes and studying other people’s technique.

       Add a point in B

    3. So strangers can watch me nearly dying on YouTube.

       Add a point in C

Buckets

1. A

   Your life is extremely ordinary.

2. B

   Your life is extreme.

3. C

   Your life is almost over.