Social media was once the preserve of teens, but is now a common part of life in the UK. Every day, people aged from eight to 80 log on in the hopes of connecting with others around the world. According to a July Tesco Mobile survey of 1,000 children aged nine to 15, social media was the main activity that 41% of them used their mobile phone for.
Yet, although grandchildren and grandparents alike use social media, they undoubtedly use it very differently. The internet changes rapidly, and it can be difficult to relate to the ways someone older or younger than you spends their time online. Here, Merrell-Ann Bradnock, 37, and her daughter, Anaiah Maloney-Muir, 17, reveal their differing perspectives on social media.
Merrell-Ann Bradnock
The first social network I ever signed up for – oh, this is so ancient – was something called Tagged. I think it was American. Basically, people had profiles and you could send them messages. There were guys on there and you could just enjoy the moment.
At school, MSN Messenger was life. You would come home after your lessons and you would just log on, use very early emojis and abbreviations such as “Be right back”. It was so much fun that you’d have the screen up while doing your homework. If there was somebody you fancied, you could maybe get a bit brave. There was no face-to-face ... it took being nervous out of the occasion, and you were in your home, your own environment, so you were comfortable as well.
You didn’t hear about the cyberbullying; you didn’t hear horrible things such as people killing themselves because somebody was troubling them. It was a place where people could get together and communicate, there wasn’t anything sordid about it, and it felt pretty safe.
Nowadays I’d be more concerned. When my daughter was younger I would always supervise her on the internet, because you just hear all of these stories about how it has become a bit of a horrible place.
I think that social media can create an illusion, or only show people one dimension of your life. You can have so much going on in the background, but you’re constantly posting pictures of you smiling. At one point I realised I was just posting pictures to keep up appearances, but not so much now because I think you get to a point – it happens at different stages for different people – where you’re comfortable within yourself. Even on my Instagram profile, I’m not adding filters, it is what it is, what you see is what you get. It’s me as me.
My husband thought I was addicted to Facebook – he’s not really a social media person – and he said: “If you can stay off Facebook for a year, you can have a handbag of your choice.” I stayed off for over a year and at first it was really difficult, but then after a while I felt I wasn’t missing much. I’ve gone from being like: “Oh my gosh, Facebook, Facebook, Facebook”, to maybe checking it a couple of times a week.
Don’t get me wrong, I really do appreciate social media and it’s helped me out – you’ve got a YouTube video for absolutely everything. When I left school, YouTube didn’t even exist. I would say social media is a blessing and a curse. As with most things, you just have to use social media responsibly, and when you use it responsibly it can actually be quite beneficial.
Anaiah Maloney-Muir
I’m not like most teenagers who are on social media a lot. Snapchat is my thing because I can control who sees what and take charge of what I put out there. I keep it safe and in my comfort zone. I’m not going to go and show the world everything about my life.
I think a lot of people my age are quite careless, though, because they’ll post anything and everything just to get a video or a subscriber. We’ve grown up in a world where we need a form of attention to feel a bit better about ourselves, and I think a lot of people find that attention on social media.
The way teenagers use social media is different to the way adults see it and understand it. I think a lot of adults tend to see social media as really malicious and a horrible place, like a war zone, but it depends on who you allow to see things.
I never got Facebook and now it’s turned into – to be honest – an old people’s platform. My dad has Snapchat – I had to change the settings so that he wouldn’t see my stories. It’s a bit like having a party and inviting your parents – why would you do that? It doesn’t make sense.
I think social media can be a really nice place as long as you manage it properly. You can get loads of laughs, a lot of banter; that’s where our entertainment comes from a lot of the time now. When adults look down on us by saying: “Oh these teenagers, obsessed with their phones”, they don’t realise that’s the equivalent of them going outside and being with their friends. I think it’s the same thing in a different way.
Snapchat is like an extension of who I am. People get to know each other a bit more there, so it has made my friendships stronger. It’s a lot freer and the relationships are a lot closer because you’re able to connect over long distances.
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