A Canadian man recently called into “The Ramsey Show” with an unusual question: Should he accept his girlfriend's offer to pay off his 35,000 Canadian dollars ($21,100) in debt? “I’m very hesitant,” said the caller, Garregg. “She made the offer about a week ago and I’ve been sitting on it.”
The Answer Is Clear
On the other hand, personal finance expert Dave Ramsey didn't hesitate. “No,” he said immediately. “You don’t pay off dating relationships’ debt. You do that when you’re married.”
Garregg explained that he and his girlfriend are both divorced and are in a long-distance relationship. He lives in Canada, and she's in Switzerland. He said she offered to pay off the debt so he could afford to save for travel and visit her more often. But Ramsey pointed out the logic doesn't hold.
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“What she’s saying is I’d rather pay $35,000 than $1,600 to go to Canada. That doesn’t make sense mathematically or logically,” co-host Jade Warshaw said.
Garregg earns about $85,000 annually and said he is on track to pay off the debt himself before next summer. Ramsey and Warshaw encouraged him to stick with that plan.
“You’re going to change the whole thing if she pays you off your debt,” Ramsey warned. “All this other stuff now enters into the equation.”
Warshaw echoed the sentiment. “You already have distance working against you. You definitely don’t need borrowed money working against you,” she said.
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When Things Go Sideways
Warshaw shared examples of what can happen when people mix money and non-marital relationships.
She recalled a man who co-signed a $17,000 car loan for his girlfriend. After they broke up, she stopped making payments. “I said, ‘Is she going to refinance it?’ He said, ‘No.’ I said, ‘Well, you better add it to your debt snowball then.'”
Another case that Ramsey remembered involved a man who bought a house with his girlfriend. After he died in a car crash, his mother inherited half the house because there was no will. “Now she owns the house with her future mother-in-law, who she didn't even like,” Ramsey said.
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The hosts warned listeners not to assume things will always go as planned.
“There's about 90 ways this could go wrong and only one way it goes right. So we don't do it,” Ramsey said. “We're not dream killers,” he added. “We're nightmare killers.”
Instead of accepting his girlfriend's offer, Ramsey and Warshaw advised Garregg to thank her for her support and ask her to keep visiting while he pays off his debt.
“I think it’s my responsibility to pay off my debt,” Warshaw advised him to tell his girlfriend. “What I need from you is to support me in the best way possible, which would be to come visit me while I’m busy paying off this debt.”
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