A self-described "hippie" mum-of-10 whose toddler daughter drowned after falling off a houseboat says the family has been "ruined" - and she has even blamed her dead daughter.
Rebecca Soetekouw's daughter Zeinobiyah, three, died earlier this month while the family was travelling around Australia on the 13ft boat called the Sumbawa.
In the fallout of the tragedy they have been ordered not to live on the houseboat - and Ms Soetekouw has told how she is now "angry" at herself, her toddler and others because they will have to return to their home in Tasmania.
The mum wrote in a since-deleted blog post on the family's website: “If she hadn’t of (sic) died, none of this would have happened. Why did it have to happen?"
Zeinobiyah drowned when she fell off the back of the yacht while it was moored in Dead Horse Bay, north of Sydney, on July 9.
Her body was later pulled from the water.
Ms Soetekouw wrote that the family - including husband Steve and their other children - have been told by Child Services they can no longer live on the houseboat because it isn't big enough, bringing an end to their adventure.
The family had been living on the boat for two years.
Maritime Services has said the vessel is not seaworthy, and repairs must be made before August 22.
In the blog post, titled "Not Becoming Homeless", Ms Soetekouw wrote: "We were told that we had four weeks to fix Sumbawa or she would be seized on us, and then we would have to pay $5,500 (£3,000) to get her back or she would be destroyed.
"All our choices had been taken away from us, as well as our daughter.
"I can't help but get angry - angry at the situation, angry at the government, angry at myself and even angry at Zeinobiyah.
"If she hadn't of died, none of this would have happened.
"But, life sometimes isn’t fair. Yet I have done enough research into the Universe, to know that I can learn from this.
“Right now, I am struggling with this.”
She said the family haven't had time to grieve since the death of her daughter.
She added: "We were emotionally ruined.
"We haven't had anytime to just bond as a family, and talk about our life now. We haven't had anytime, to find ourselves now – in any way."
The family had been staying in emergency housing, but were told they would have to vacate by Monday.
The mum had been documenting the adventure on their website, which was offline on Monday.
Ms Soetekouw said the family was told that they had to go back to their home in Tasmania, which they still own.
But she said they do not want to go back.
She wrote: "We left Tasmania, and our house to live a new life. Going back, was a backwards step in our book.
"But we were left with no other choice.
"Regardless of what we desire, our decisions were being made for us."
She added: "Everyone wants to go back on the water.
"We feel Zeinobiyah there now. Her Spirit is in the water and we connect with her there."
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