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MOREY STETTNER

Henry Kissinger Turns 100 And Imparts Lessons Of An Eventful Life

Henry Kissinger turns 100 on May 27. His life embodies a century of groundbreaking history — and contains lessons for anyone looking to communicate and negotiate better with others.

Kissinger, who served as national security advisor and secretary of state for President Richard Nixon and Gerald Ford, rose to the pinnacle of power in the 1960s and 1970s. His 40 months as secretary of state left a lasting impact on political relations around the globe. He won the Nobel Peace Prize in 1973.

"In his relatively short time in government, Kissinger played a leading role in creating the world we live in — a post-Cold War world, a globalized world and a more diffuse world," said Luke Nichter, a professor of history at Chapman University.

Tap The Power Of Education

Kissinger was born in Bavaria in 1923. He experienced the hardship of political conflict at an early age. He fled Nazi Germany with his family when he was 15.

That meant Kissinger needed to start a new life. His family chose New York City. And education was key to his rise. After high school, Kissinger joined the U.S. Army where he was awarded a Bronze Star for his counterintelligence work.

Kissinger's intellect propelled his success. He earned multiple degrees from Harvard College. And by his mid-30s, he was teaching at Harvard, writing books on foreign policy and consulting with government agencies and think tanks. That led to Kissinger joining Nixon's Cabinet.

Nichter, author of "The Last Brahmin" who listened to hundreds of hours of the Nixon tapes, marvels at the way Kissinger related to Nixon.

"He was one of the rare people who could push back on Nixon," Nichter said. "But he never says, 'You're wrong.' He was great at using self-deprecating humor. He'd make fun of his German accent. If Nixon criticized 'Harvard professors,' Kissinger replied, 'I agree completely about Harvard professors' even though he was one."

When he disagreed with Nixon, he'd often cite analysis from his team as his source of information. He'd say, "Here's what my staff reports show." This allowed him to contradict the president without alienating the prickly Nixon.

Like many shrewd advisors to top leaders, Kissinger understood that the best way to win over the boss is to drop hints, not pound a fist.

"He'd plant data here and there so that Nixon would come to (Kissinger's) outcome on his own," Nichter said. "He'd make it like it was Nixon's idea in the first place. That's how he got Nixon's buy-in."

Make Every Word Count Like Kissinger

Exceptionally smart people often speak quickly. They rattle off ideas and opinions at a rapid-fire clip, forcing their audience to keep up. Kissinger, by contrast, deploys fewer words to make a greater impact.

John Hamre, president and chief executive of the Center for Strategic and International Studies in Washington, D.C., chaired the Defense Policy Board, a federal advisory committee with high-profile members. Kissinger, a board member, didn't talk much. But when he did, he made every word count.

"We'd be in the midafternoon session and I thought he was asleep," Hamre said. "But then he'd say in three sentences the most brilliant observation of the day."

Kissinger's slow vocal tempo works to his advantage. He's able to lend gravitas to his words through his succinct delivery.

In 2008, Nichter recalls a private meeting with Kissinger to discuss Henry Cabot Lodge Jr., the subject of a book Nichter was writing. At one point, Nichter asked Kissinger to confirm facts about Lodge.

"He looks at me and then his chin drops to his chest," Nichter recalled. "I almost thought he was taking a nap. But after maybe 20 seconds, he revives and responds."

Such a deliberate manner of speaking served Kissinger well as a diplomat. It helped him avoid blurting out impulsive comments that he'd later regret.

Position Yourself To Succeed

For Nichter, one of Kissinger's triumphs was his secret trip to China in July 1971. At the time, there were no diplomatic relations between the U.S. and China.

In listening to the Nixon tapes, Nichter noted how Kissinger maneuvered himself into getting the president to send him to China. He knew that whoever made this historic trip would play a central role in changing the global order.

"Kissinger is lobbying Nixon on who should go to China and making sure he's the one to go," Nichter said. "When Nixon suggests Nelson Rockefeller, Kissinger says Rockefeller 'would never do what you'll want.' When Nixon mentions George Bush Sr., Kissinger says Bush isn't as close to Nixon so he won't understand Nixon's desired outcome. Kissinger manages to knock out everyone else" to nab the plum assignment.

Kissinger's secret visit laid the groundwork for Nixon's momentous China trip in February 1972, ending decades of hostility between the two nations.

Kissinger: Use Empathy To Forge Bonds

A key to Kissinger's effectiveness as a diplomat and advisor is his ability to connect with diverse personalities. He's attuned to his audience and sees the world through their eyes.

"One of his transcending strengths is a capacity to understand and help a wide range of people," Hamre said. "He's an empathetic listener. He tries to understand how others think."

His keen mind allows him to apply a long-term perspective to a short-term geopolitical challenge. Throughout his career, he has studied the past to help address challenges in the present.

"As a student of history, he uses that knowledge to provide context to a complex problem," Hamre said. "He brilliantly sees broader patterns that most people miss because he has this wide, wide intellect."

His self-control adds to his persuasive power, especially when dealing with adversaries. If they explode in anger, he tends to remain calm.

"He doesn't get caught up in how someone says something or the tonality of their voice," Hamre said. "Rather than focus on the way people express their argument, he gets to a more fundamental understanding of the issue. Verbal fireworks don't distract him."

Be A Master Negotiator Like Kissinger

As a negotiator, Kissinger excelled at acknowledging each side's stance. Even if he didn't agree, he articulated their point of view to their satisfaction.

"As an intermediary in Middle East negotiations, he showed a deep understanding of everyone's position," said Thomas A. Schwartz, distinguished professor of history at Vanderbilt University. "That helped him build trust with all sides."

He knew when to keep his opinions to himself. Rather than inflame tensions, he sought to forge bonds.

"Even if he didn't care for (an adversary), he would stress the positive aspects," said Schwartz, author of "Henry Kissinger and American Power." "He was very careful with the pride they took in their positions and their history. With the Arabs, for example, he reassured them that he respected their civilization."

The demands of his job didn't seem to affect his stamina. He tapped reserves of energy when he needed them most.

"He had an extraordinary endurance level," Schwartz said. Colleagues admired his ability to outlast everyone else in the room during marathon negotiating sessions.

As much as Kissinger thrived in the spotlight, he sometimes sought to stay in the shadows. When he learned that Time magazine was going to name him Man of the Year in 1972 along with Nixon, he replied, "Couldn't you make it just Nixon?"

"He had a huge ego," Schwartz said. "But he realized it could create problems with his boss" if they shared the stage. Nevertheless, Time recognized both of them.

Henry Kissinger's Keys:

  • Served as national security advisor and secretary of state for President Richard Nixon.
  • Overcame: Born in Germany, Kissinger and his family fled the Nazis to start a new life in America.
  • "Don't be too ambitious. Do the most important thing you can think of doing every year and then your career will take care of itself."

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