Industrialist Harsh Goenka often shares inspiring thoughts on social media. On Tuesday, he took to X (formerly Twitter) to post another motivational message about anger, forgiveness, and inner peace.
The post read: “I asked my Guru, ‘What is anger?’
He smiled and said, ‘Anger is the punishment you give yourself for someone else’s mistake.’
I said, ‘But they hurt me.’
My Guru replied, ‘Perhaps. But the event lasted a moment. Your anger keeps it alive for days, months, even years. So forgiveness is not for their peace. It is for yours.’”
The post resonated with many users, who shared their own thoughts in the comments.
“Indeed! In reality, to win over and practice this thought takes a great deal of virtue,” wrote one user.
Another commented, “Absolutely right, but it’s hard to control when someone misbehaves.”
A third user added, “No second thoughts about the fruits of forgiveness. It brings divine favor. However, righteous anger doesn't harm anyone; rather, it corrects. Yes, we should not allow the sun to set on our anger.”
How to Control Anger Before It Controls You
According to the American Psychological Association (APA), anger is a completely normal and often healthy human emotion. However, when it becomes excessive or uncontrollable, it can turn destructive.
“Anger can lead to problems at work, in your personal relationships, and in the overall quality of your life,” the APA notes.
Like other emotions, anger is accompanied by physiological and biological changes. When a person becomes angry, heart rate and blood pressure rise, along with the levels of stress hormones such as adrenaline and noradrenaline.
While anger can be a natural response and even necessary for survival, the APA emphasizes the importance of managing it constructively. One approach involves redirecting or converting anger into more positive behavior. However, suppressing anger without addressing it can sometimes contribute to issues such as high blood pressure, hypertension, or depression.
The APA also notes that people can learn to control their reactions when they feel angry.
Why Do People Get Angry?
According to the APA, anger may stem from both genetic and environmental factors.
“There is evidence that some children are born irritable, touchy, and easily angered, and that these signs are present from a very early age,” the organization states.
Social and cultural influences can also play a role in shaping how people express and manage anger.
Tips to Control Anger
The APA recommends several strategies to manage anger effectively:
Practice relaxation techniques: Deep breathing and other relaxation exercises can help calm the body's stress response.
Change the way you think: Replace angry thoughts with more rational and balanced perspectives.
Use humor appropriately: Humor can help diffuse tension and reduce the intensity of anger.
Change your environment: Taking a break from a stressful situation can provide perspective and prevent emotional escalation.
Learning to manage anger does not mean suppressing emotions. Rather, it involves recognizing feelings, understanding their causes, and responding in healthier, more constructive ways.
