Having arrived in Orlando the day of the Pulse shootings and stayed there all week, and having spent the past week in New York City in the neighborhood where the Stonewall riots kicked off the modern lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender rights movement, there are many things I am proud of this pride season.
I am so proud of my queer brothers, sisters and gender nonconforming family.
I am proud that here in New York, where the Stonewall Inn looks like a fortified police bunker post-Orlando, queer people are nonetheless questioning the over-policing of our society. I’m proud that queer people are considering how police at bars could put our Latinx queer family at risk for harassment and all queer people of color at risk for police violence. I am proud that queer Americans are resisting turning this moment into a pinkwashing opportunity to justify even more police surveillance.
I am proud that our queer ancestors resisted the police 47 years ago, when they rose up against abusive arrests at the Stonewall, just as I am proud that a pillar of our queer community, Chelsea Manning, has continued to stand up to state violence as a whistleblower.
I am proud that queer people of color, especially queer Latinx people, are refusing to be erased by demanding accountability when anyone tries to make them invisible.
I am proud of queers who wanted to politicize this moment: who demanded that the homophobia and racism be named, and who angrily demanded action. And I am proud of queer Muslim people who are standing up to tell the world how they practice their sexuality, gender identity and faith – and of queer people of all faiths who refuse to allow the Pulse shootings to be co-opted for Islamophobia.
I am proud that queer people are taking on gun violence and gun control. It is heartening to see meetings of Gag – Gays Against Guns – popping up, organizing for a march in Sunday’s pride as Act Up once marched for action on HIV/Aids. It is inspiring to see LGBT organizations joining coalition efforts like Everytown For Gun Safety, too.
But I am even more proud that queer people are thinking about American violence beyond gun control. I love hearing gay people discuss how donors of both parties take too much money from war manufacturers. I am proud of the disgust I hear when people acknowledge that the Human Rights Campaign – the largest LGBT lobbying group – has accepted donations from arms manufacturers like Northrop Grumman, helping fuel the cycle of American violence abroad and at home under the guise of gay rights.
I am proud of feminist queer people who are forcing us to look not just at the homophobia and racism at Pulse’s Latin Night, but at the toxic, perverted hyper masculinity of such attacks. In the thousand or so mass shootings since Sandy Hook, two have been committed by so-called Muslims but all have been committed by men. What this means, and how we can reconsider “manliness” and undercut machismo malarkey, is work queer Americans are doing creatively and imperatively.
I am proud that queer people continue to show physical affection. Omar Matteen may have been angry at the sight of two men kissing, as his father said, but this is no time to draw away from each other.
I am proud of drag queens, especially southern drag queens. If this wicked world can be saved, it will be by them. In those first days after the attacks, it was drag queens rallying together in Orlando’s shattered LGBT community to raise money for the victims and to hold Orlando’s queer children together in community. And the way they undo gender helps create a world where there are different definitions of being “manly”.
I am proud of LGBT people who work in the service economy, who largely remain invisible – and I am in awe at how they kept working in Orlando even as their friends, lovers and coworkers were being identified.
I am proud of gay people laughing at Trump when he told the internet to “ask the gays”, and I am proud of the queer people who are critical of Hillary Clinton. Our lives won’t be more valued by being nice to politicians.
And I am proud of LGBT people who are going to pride celebrations this year, and to those who recognize that staying home is best for them. We have been through a lot, and there’s a long road ahead. Self care can mean going out with our shirts off on the pride route or making a quiet dinner with our friends. But either way, we’ve got much to be proud of regarding what our extended queer family has done and where it’s going.
Happy Pride.
