Registration has opened for the 2013 Guardian Edinburgh International Television Festival, while this year's opening session – a time honoured festival tradition in which top TV suits endure all manner of humiliation as contestants on a live version of the hit format du jour – will channel Great British Bake Off, under the watchful eye of Paul Hollywood and official national treasure Mary Berry. The roll call of TV types making tits of themselves in years past includes 2005's Strictly Come Dancing featuring Channel 5's then director of programmes Dan Chambers shaving his chest and leapfrogging his dance partner and former Sky and C5 exec Richard Woolfe sporting a tight black ensemble slashed to the navel. Woolfe, a serial offender who also did turns in GEITF versions of Stars In Their Eyes and Britain's Got Talent – joined on stage by 20 school children in traditional Irish dress for his Flatley-esque jig during the latter – was nonetheless outdone in the jaw-dropping awfulness stakes in the same 2009 contest by Jana Bennett. The then BBC Vision director's assault and battery of 60s hit The Letter was described by judge Amanda Holden as "music to slit your wrists to". Monkey can't wait – contestants, start your blenders!
