When most people picture grandparents, the image is pretty universal: doting retirees who are quick to babysit, slip a $20 bill into a birthday card, and proudly cheer from the bleachers at Little League games. But for many in Generation X — born between 1965 and 1980 — that picture doesn't quite line up with reality.
A TikTok video calling Gen X the "worst grandparents" made the leap to Reddit, where the debate really caught fire. Millennials in particular said they were baffled that their Gen X parents, now just aging into grandparenthood, weren't eager to help with childcare.
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TikTok creator Kylie Muse put it bluntly after hearing so many Gen X grandparents say things like "I'm not a babysitter" or "I didn't have any help." She called it "quite a common theme for Gen X parents to be neglectful in some capacity" and said it was "crazy they haven't learned from the past 20 to 30 years." Muse argued that instead of stepping up for their kids during one of life's hardest transitions, many Gen X grandparents double down on pride and hyper-individualism.
"It's still your job to be your kids' parent, even when they are parents," she said. "Just because people turn 18 does not mean they don't need a mom and a dad." Muse added that this gap is largely a Western issue, pointing out that "if you look anywhere else, multigenerational living is the standard."
The critique hit hard, but Gen X didn't take the label lying down. On Reddit, one comment cut to the chase: "It's harder to devote time to the doting grandparent thing when you know you have to work till like 80." Another user pointed out, "Gen X ended up as a sandwich generation. They have their own minor kids, elderly grandparents, careers, and their own health. They don't have time or energy to take care of a grandkid too."
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Others stressed just how much of their lives were shaped by economic survival. As one person wrote, "We were latchkey kids because our parents were working nonstop just to keep a roof over our heads. Now it feels like we're stuck in the same grind — still working, still paying off debt, and barely keeping up."
So are Gen Xers really in the grandparent stage? As of 2025, the generation spans ages 45 to 60. The oldest, born in 1965, are now 60 years old — young enough that many are still working full-time, especially since the U.S. retirement age for full Social Security benefits is 67.
Surveys suggest many Gen Xers expect to work well into their 70s, with delayed retirement becoming the norm thanks to rising costs, health insurance needs, and stagnant wages during their peak earning years. Unlike Baby Boomers, who often retired in their early 60s, Gen Xers are more likely to still be clocking in at 65 or even 70. Some may still have teenagers at home, aging parents who need care, or both.
That survivalist streak has carried forward. Gen X prides itself on independence, but when it collides with millennial expectations of hands-on grandparenting, tensions flare. The conversation isn't really about whether they're the "worst grandparents" — it's about how work, burnout, and delayed retirement are reshaping what grandparenting looks like in 2025.
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