From Simon Cowell to jock straps: Marina Hyde’s Lost in Showbiz quiz of the year

Composite: Getty/Rex

1. 

   According to the daily schedule he posted in September, at what time does actor Mark Wahlberg get up in the morning?

   1. Before lunch

   2. Before Farming Today

   3. Before even people who are featured in the long-running Sunday Times magazine feature A Life in the Day

   4. 2.30am

2. 

   As well as a cheque for $350,000, what did Paris Hilton give in November to victims of 2017’s devastating Mexican earthquake?

   1. Presentation boxes of her new fragrance Platinum Rush

   2. Presentation boxes of her classic fragrance Heiress

   3. Presentation boxes of her limited-edition fragrance Anniversary

   4. Blankets and drinking water

3. 

   In a November interview, Simon Cowell revealed he had split from which pair of entities, in order to rid his business of toxic influences?

   1. Olly Murs and Rupert Murdoch

   2. Little Mix and Philip Green

   3. Susan Boyle and David Geffen

   4. Louis Walsh and Sinitta

4. The forthcoming ITV drama Wild Bill is set in Boston, Lincolnshire, the town that voted leave in the highest percentage in the 2016 EU referendum. Who plays the “take-no-prisoners” police chief?

   1. Matt Dillon

   2. Rob Lowe

   3. Lou Diamond Phillips

   4. Christian Slater

5. In October, who declared: “My eyes are now wide open and now realise I’ve been used to spread messages I don’t believe in. I am distancing myself from politics and completely focusing on being creative”?

   1. Taylor Swift

   2. Kanye West

   3. Kim Kardashian

   4. Susan Sarandon

6. 

   Which of these did Steven Seagal achieve in the last year?

   1. He was appointed special diplomatic envoy to the United States by Vladimir Putin and banned from entering Ukraine for five years for national security reasons

   2. He starred in two films and published a novel about the deep state entitled The Way of the Shadow Wolves

   3. He became the mascot for the cryptocurrency called Bitcoiin

   4. All of the above

7. 

   In a bid to end their six-year feud, what did Katy Perry send Taylor Swift as an olive branch in May?

   1. An olive branch

   2. Her new album, featuring an autosignature

   3. An apology, on scented unicorn stationery

   4. The three backing dancers she allegedly poached from her in 2012

8. 

   In April, what development in China was described by Jessie J as a cultural boundary-smashing “beginning of something really magical”?

   1. The Great Leap Forward

   2. Her April victory in a Chinese TV singing competition

   3. Xi Jinping’s constitutional amendment revoking the two-term limit on his presidency

   4. The trial of three of Hong Kong’s highest-profile pro-democracy protests

9. 

   2018 was Paul Hollywood’s turn to take custody of the great British telly chefs’ rotating midlife crisis. What is the name of his young love interest?

   1. Spring Monteys-Chelsy

   2. Summer Monteys-Fullam

   3. Autumn Monteys-Ballam

   4. Winter Monteys-Kensyngton

10. Which of the following was a genuine lot in Russell Crowe’s April auction, The Art of Divorce?

    1. A used leather jock strap from Cinderella Man

    2. A fully functioning chariot from Gladiator

    3. A mosasaur skull he bought from Leonardo DiCaprio

    4. All of the above

11. 

    In a January kiss-and-tell billed as “5,500 words of cray”, how did porn star Stormy Daniels describe sex with Donald Trump?

    1. Standard vanilla

    2. Missionary blah-blah

    3. Textbook generic

    4. Your basic

12. 

    In a January interview, of whom did Erykah Badu observe, “I saw something good”, adding that he “was a wonderful painter”?

    1. Rolf Harris

    2. George W Bush

    3. Adolf Hitler

    4. Ken Livingstone

Solutions

1:D, 2:A, 3:B, 4:B, 5:B, 6:D, 7:A, 8:B, 9:B, 10:D, 11:C, 12:C

Scores

1. 12 and above.

   Congratulations! You won the chance to be my holiday cover!

2. 11 and above.

   Congratulations! You won the chance to be my holiday cover!

3. 10 and above.

   Admit it. You’re disproportionately irritated by the easy ones you got wrong

4. 9 and above.

   Admit it. You’re disproportionately irritated by the easy ones you got wrong

5. 8 and above.

   Admit it. You’re disproportionately irritated by the easy ones you got wrong

6. 7 and above.

   You’re neither a Lost in Showbiz obsessive nor a Lost in Showbiz ignoramus. Do try to focus next year, won’t you?

7. 6 and above.

   You’re neither a Lost in Showbiz obsessive nor a Lost in Showbiz ignoramus. Do try to focus next year, won’t you?

8. 5 and above.

   You’re neither a Lost in Showbiz obsessive nor a Lost in Showbiz ignoramus. Do try to focus next year, won’t you?

9. 4 and above.

   Poor show. It’s almost as if you’ve had more important things to worry about – but what? Really, what could possibly be more important?

10. 3 and above.

    Poor show. It’s almost as if you’ve had more important things to worry about – but what? Really, what could possibly be more important?

11. 2 and above.

    Poor show. It’s almost as if you’ve had more important things to worry about – but what? Really, what could possibly be more important?

12. 0 and above.

    Poor show. It’s almost as if you’ve had more important things to worry about – but what? Really, what could possibly be more important?

13. 1 and above.

    Poor show. It’s almost as if you’ve had more important things to worry about – but what? Really, what could possibly be more important?