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The Guardian - UK
The Guardian - UK
Tracy Ramsden

From periods to pain: five shame-free conversations to have now

Smiling male talking to friends while sitting on bench in sports court
Talking openly about hidden health conditions helps all of our wellbeing. Photograph: Maskot/Getty Images

When was the last time you talked about incontinence with friends? Or discussed heavy periods with your partner? We’re guessing not recently. Because despite making some positive steps towards supporting our wellbeing, such as speaking more openly about mental health, there are still a number of everyday health issues not being discussed.

Wetting yourself when you laugh, or bleeding through your clothes during a period may not casually come up in conversation, but it’s only by sharing experiences of hidden health conditions that we can truly future-proof our wellbeing. In 2022, Essity – a global hygiene and health company with leading period and intimate care brands such as Bodyform and Modibodi, incontinence brand TENA and compression therapy brand JOBST – conducted a survey, which highlighted how far we still have to go when it comes to talking about trickier matters. Here, we take a look at the results that show why now is the time to get honest.

Only 33% of men say they are knowledgeable about menstruation compared with 75% of women
All this coded talk of “Aunt Flo” paying a monthly visit won’t help to destigmatise menstruation, something that nearly half the world’s population will experience at some point in their life.

Talking openly about menstruation, how we feel during our periods and the challenges we face – particularly for women experiencing menorrhagia (severe or prolonged bleeding, which affects one in five women) – is a gamechanger in feeling less alone.

Closing the knowledge gap between men and women when it comes to menstruation is vital. According to the Essity survey, 59% of men think that nothing can be done about the pain and mood swings women experience during menstruation.

Women alone can’t shoulder the responsibility, men need to take a more active role in conversations around menstruation, sharing the responsibility with women and finally putting an end to “period shame”.

A woman takes a hot bath as her partner rests his arm on the side of the tub and gazes at her lovingly.
It’s important that men take a more active role in conversations around menstruation. Photograph: Catherine Falls Commercial/Getty Images

More than one in five (23%) people going through incontinence avoid talking about it
That’s a lot of people suffering in silence and it could explain why incontinence is a condition loaded with misconceptions. Despite it being commonly associated with elderly people or women after childbirth, a quarter of men over the age of 40 will experience some kind of urine leakage.

A separate study in the US, by the National Association for Continence, says that incontinence affects as many as 15% of men aged 15-64. Yet, nobody is talking about wet patches on their underwear for fear of judgment.

From young men using their wives’ sanitary towels, to new mothers afraid to wander too far from the bathroom, the culture of keeping quiet means that 39% of people experiencing urine leakage believe they’re not getting enough access to basic health and hygiene products, and that needs to change.

More than one third (34%) of people believe being pain-free is essential for their daily wellbeing
And yet, just under 28 million people in the UK are currently living with chronic pain, according to the National Institute for Health and Care Excellence, often in the form of hidden conditions such as arthritis, endometriosis or lymphedema.

That’s almost half the population who go about their daily lives in pain or discomfort, so you may find that if you open up a conversation around your own health challenges, the chances are that somebody close to you will be similarly suffering in silence.

Sharing, as they say, is caring, and in this case it’s essential to getting the best support and access to healthcare products that will help alleviate daily pain and clear the path to true wellbeing.

Smiling teenagers participating in classroom discussion
Educating children from a young age about menstruation and menopause would dispel many misconceptions. Photograph: JohnnyGreig/Getty Images

Nearly half (45%) of respondents agree that education is key to breaking the stigma
Imagine a world where teenage boys felt comfortable discussing menopause. It’s a societal change that would help break barriers to wellbeing. According to Essity, 45% of people say schools should create safe spaces for dialogue and education around health and hygiene matters.

Given that only 5% of people feel comfortable talking about periods with teachers (and only 4% feel able to talk about incontinence), there’s a clear need for greater support in schools.

For many vulnerable groups who may not even have access to education, it’s a much bigger problem, with 47% agreeing that governments have a responsibility to provide menstruation products for free to those who need them most.

Ultimately, teaching children and adolescents about health issues such as menstruation and menopause from a young age would help to dispel the misconceptions.

34% of respondents say we are all responsible for a healthier future
Breaking down barriers to wellbeing single-handed may feel like a mountain to climb, but together it’s as simple as collectively calling time on outdated misconceptions, opening up new conversations and taking time to understand the experiences of others.

Whether it’s parents being more honest with children about hidden health issues, teachers taking on the responsibility to educate pupils about subjects previously seen as “taboo”, or being more open with our partners about personal health challenges, we all need to start thinking about our collective health over our individual needs. Only then will the future look and feel healthier for us all.

Essity Video-HostedByBanner
Not all health conditions are immediately obvious; meet those living with invisible conditions at Essity’s Studio Taboo

Help to create more understanding for each other, and break down barriers to wellbeing, by sharing Essity’s Studio Taboo film.

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