After the notorious ‘wardrobe malfunction’ of 2004’s Super Bowl half-time show, Janet Jackson’s career was decimated, while Justin Timberlake walked off whistling. With the latter recently confirmed for 2018’s ceremony, how might a possible reunion between the pop idols work?
1 Whoops now
In a scenario that strives for equality, Janet performs a Bucks Fizz-style trews-removal move on Timberlake, whose slacks fly across the stadium by drone while his penis and scrotum billow in the breeze.
2 Again
As a social experiment, Justin and Janet recreate the 2004 performance move for move, to test how far media standards have progressed. To be repeated every 14 years.
3 That’s the way it goes, love
Timberlake stands motionless in a foam nipple outfit while Houston’s NRG Stadium boos and chants “shame”.
4 It doesn’t really matter
Chris Martin, inevitably, takes the role of on-stage couples’ counsellor, encouraging both parties to work through their trust issues. Featuring an unexplained appearance by Wiz Khalifa.
5 Miss me much?
Justin introduces – it couldn’t be! It might be! IT IS! – his special guest, Janet Jackson. But the platform rising from below the stage is totally empty, and we all learn a very important lesson about loyalty.
