Building financial stability can feel like a hard-won victory. But not everyone in your social circle may share in the celebration. On a recent episode of "The Ramsey Show," financial expert Dave Ramsey and co-host Jade Warshaw tackled a listener's question about friends making dismissive or sarcastic remarks after she and her husband became debt-free.
Ramsey's advice was straightforward: if negative comments continue, set boundaries — and after three strikes, cut ties.
When Financial Success Reveals True Friendships
Jessica, a caller from Massachusetts, explained that after she and her husband paid off debt and started enjoying financial freedom, her husband's friends began making snide comments. For example, when they bought a truck in cash, people responded with, "Must be nice."
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Ramsey didn't mince words about what that kind of reaction means. "Real friends are exposed when two things happen: crisis and success," he said. "Your husband has found out that he has acquaintances. They're not friends."
Warshaw agreed, adding that genuine friends know how to celebrate your wins, not tear them down.
Striking Out: Ramsey's Rule for Negativity
Ramsey recommended addressing the issue head-on but with limits. His approach: "If somebody does that, they get about two of those, and third strike, they're out."
In other words, people can make mistakes — maybe speaking out of envy or frustration once or twice — but ongoing negativity shouldn't be tolerated.
Warshaw suggested that if the relationship is meaningful, it might be worth asking directly what the person means by their comments. Their response could reveal whether the friendship can be salvaged. But Ramsey added that many of these so-called friends are simply showing their true colors.
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Envy vs. Support
Ramsey and Warshaw highlighted the difference between jealousy and envy. Jealousy might mean wishing you had what someone else has. Envy, Ramsey explained, goes further: it resents the other person's success and doesn't want them to have it at all.
That, he said, is toxic. And when people respond to your progress with dismissive phrases like "You're so lucky" or "Still doing that little business?" it undermines the hard work and sacrifice behind financial achievements.
"‘You’re so lucky' — that one pisses me off," Ramsey said. "Lucky's got calluses. Lucky's got hours spent while you were sitting on your butt drinking beer, watching Netflix."
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Protecting Your Peace
For those who encounter similar challenges, Ramsey's message is clear: celebrate your success without overexplaining it, address disrespect when it arises, and don't be afraid to distance yourself from relationships that become consistently negative.
"If it's family, then you just limit the amount of time you're around them," Ramsey advised. For acquaintances or casual friends, he recommended that Jessica "casually not be available anymore."
Financial milestones are worth celebrating. Surrounding yourself with people who support and encourage you can make the journey not only more rewarding but also more sustainable.
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