Rugby World Cup: Opening Ceremony
6.45pm, ITV
The Danny Boyle spectacular that opened the 2012 Olympics has set a high bar for global sports events staged in the UK. The curtain-raiser to the eighth Rugby World Cup, which takes place at Twickenham, provides the perfect opportunity to put on more than just a brass band: we are promised a performance that retells the beginnings of the sport, at Rugby School in 1823 when William Webb Ellis fatefully decided to grab the ball and run with it. John Inverdale introduces. David Stubbs
Sarah Millican Hijacks Deal Or No Deal
8pm, Channel 4
The congenial geordie wrests control of the afternoon quizshow from Noel Edmonds on the basis that someone had to before he became all-powerful, did his hair like Jesus again and attempted to rule the Earth. It’s 10 years since the first show and Millican is brought in as box-lid tease while Noel circles the podium, playing the game himself for charity. This episode also features “memorable contestants” who return to assist Noel in his benevolent efforts. It’s more fun with a comic in charge. Julia Raeside
Pussies Galore: Love Me, Love My Cat
8pm, Channel 5
Cats: fluffy companions that love doing funny things on the internet. What’s not to like? But you can take things too far, as this documentary about fanatical cat lovers proves. At the more extreme end of the scale is a Californian who has adopted more than 1,000 strays. Back home, a West Country woman has amassed a collection of rosettes thanks to her 18 show-winning cats. There’s also a woman with 40 cat-related tattoos, and the proud proprietor of Newcastle’s first cat cafe. Hannah Verdier
Ripper Street
9pm, BBC1
The third season concludes, with the real story behind the locomotive crash that claimed 55 Whitechapel souls ready to spill out, just as H Division is in disarray. Inspector Reid is physically inconstant after an attempt on his life, while rascally Doc Jackson is panicked and desperate. Can they withstand the machinations of Long Susan’s shipping magnate father, the ruthless, well-tailored Swift? Things look grim, but unlike last time, fans already know Ripper Street will be back on the beat, with two more series confirmed. Graeme Virtue
Rick Stein: From Venice To Istanbul
9.30pm, BBC2
“Crew lunch” has been a good feature of this latest series, particularly to see Keith Floyd/Stein producer David Pritchard in action. Tonight’s arrival in Turkey and a meal of roasted goat offers such an occasion, Pritchard’s vaguely sceptical ribbing an antidote to the passionate poetry-quoting presenter. There’s great sea-to-plate stuff, and appreciation of the grilled sardine, but while Rick’s expedition to fish on the Bosphorus is a highpoint, his koftes with pistachios may prove the try-at-home dish. John Robinson
South Park
10pm, Comedy Central
It’s the first episode of season 19 and South Park is still occasionally capable of offering up action as acerbic as ever, with the previous season garnering an Emmy nomination. As you might expect from the famously on-the-fly series, scant episode information is available before going to press, but don’t be surprised to see Parker and Stone tackling recent topics such as televised gun violence, Donald Trump’s GOP jamboree, or the district NAACP president turning out to be one Eric Cartman. Mark Gibbings-Jones
People Time
11pm, BBC3
There are seven comedians behind what is by far the funniest of this year’s BBC Comedy Feed pilots: the members of sketch trio Sheeps (Liam Williams, Alastair Roberts, Daran Johnson); Ellie White and Natasia Demetriou (who perform together as Mother And Baby); the latter’s brother Jamie, and Australian comic Claudia O’Doherty. From this network of comedy talent springs sharp, silly, strange skits that radiate confidence and wit. If the long-floundering Great British sketch show has any chance of relevancy again, this is it. Rachel Aroesti
Film choices
Lovelace (Rob Epstein, Jeffrey Friedman, 2013) 10.40pm, Film4
In 1972 hardcore porn was suddenly extremely fashionable in the US, the film Deep Throat leading the way and its star, Linda Lovelace (nee Boreman) becoming a celebrated object of notoriety. This is based on her subsequent memoir, which revealed the squalid background of rape and abuse behind the glitzy movie – though the motives of the producers are debatable. Amanda Seyfried is a sympathetic Linda, Peter Sarsgaard her slimy husband/abuser/mentor Chuck Traynor. Paul Howlett
Winter’s Bone (Debra Granik, 2010) 12.05am, BBC2
In a remote patch of the Ozark mountains, 17-year-old Ree Dolly (Jennifer Lawrence) cares for her little brother, her sister and their depressed mother. But to save the family home, Ree has to locate her absconded, crystal-meth-making father – a dangerous quest that attracts a violent response from her own morose and secretive clanspeople. Lawrence is irresistible as the proud and resilient Ree – a Katniss Everdeen in the making – in a quietly riveting, atmospheric drama. PH
Today’s best live sport
Davis Cup Tennis: Great Britain v Australia Opening day of the semi-finals of the tournament, the furthest stage Britain have reached since 1981. 1pm, BBC2
World Cup Rugby Union: England v Fiji Hosts England get the tournament under way against Fiji. 7.25pm, ITV
Rugby League: St Helens v Wigan Warriors Super 8s clash. 7.30pm, Sky Sports 1
PGA Tour Golf: BMW Championship Day two action from Lake Forest, Illinois. 8pm, Sky Sports 4
