Foxx and Fioretti in the same race — what’s not to love?

Cook County State’s Attorney Kim Foxx | Ashlee Rezin Garcia/Sun-Times file photo

Oh Kim Foxx, Kim Foxx ...

There are so many reasons to not write about you, ever.

First, the race thing. Why risk provoking the Carol Moseley Braun defense? You know, when pointing out obvious deficiencies of public officials who are black is portrayed as a form of bigotry.

Thus, if I observe, oh, for instance, that Foxx wasn’t ready for the job — her main qualifications being a law degree and a cozy spot under the wing of Cook County Board President Toni Preckwinkle, who elevated her for reasons mysterious — then suddenly I’m Bull Connor tightening my grip around an axe handle.

When in reality, the defense itself is racist: the racism of low expectations, the unsupportable notion that certain public figures are exempt from the careful scrutiny that any full-fledged adult must expect when entering the political arena.

To be safe, let’s bend over backward with Foxx.

A definite improvement over Anita Alvarez — Javert from “Les Miserables” would have been a definite improvement over Alvarez — Foxx so thoroughly botched the Jussie Smollet case that it overshadowed her record, particularly when, as if for an encore, to show what she is really capable of, Foxx even more acrobatically botched the fallout to her botching the Smollett case.

Sigh. Let me apologize in advance. I am so sorry I brought this up. No turning back now.

Perhaps I could spin it as a sign of moral strength that Foxx didn’t just slink away. Didn’t spontaneously combust in a mini-mushroom cloud of shame. That could be the tagline of a campaign commercial: “Kim Foxx: Strong enough to confront the mess she made.”

Speaking of commercials. Before Thanksgiving Foxx released a digital commercial. I knew what was coming and put it off as long as I could, then forced myself to watch.

Two minutes and 12 seconds, starting with Foxx driving through a snowstorm. Cabrini-Green upbringing. Sexual assault. The ad for a newcomer, not someone with a four-year record tainted by Smollett.

Then on to attacking those attacking her office: Donald Trump. The NRA. The Fraternal Order of Police. “They’ll do anything to undercut progress.”

The enemy of your enemies is your friend.

A few seconds on Jussie Smollet. She screwed up. “I own that.” Yes, you do. Points for stating the obvious, belatedly. “I’m making changes in my office to make sure we do better.” Like what? Resignation would have been the ideal route, but that doesn’t seem on the table.

In Foxx’s defense. Any idea how many cases her office handled last year that weren’t Jussie Smollett? About 35,000. And if central among her predecessor’s multitudinous flaws was a willingness to drop the full weight of Cook County legal system on every homeless woman who stole a loaf of bread, Foxx dismissed 5,000 low-level cases to focus on more significant crimes. I voted for her because I was tired of Alvarez training Cook County’s legal bazooka at every gnat, and Foxx kept that campaign promise.

Just as I was contemplating Foxx, the way you sigh and go for the paper towels and Simply Green after the cat is ill, former alderman Bob Fioretti announced he is the fifth candidate to pop out of the clown car of opportunists who smell Foxx’s blood in the water. Oh boy! Bob Fioretti! Now we’re talkin’! He’s run for for mayor, twice; for state senator; for Cook County Board president.

Bob Fioretti, during his 2016 run for the Illinois Senate.

I wish I could render in words the snort of derision that a . . . close connubial associate of mine emitted when news of Fioretti’s candidacy came over the radio. A true pig-rooting-for-chestnuts sound, a raspberry of scorn.

”Maybe he’s entering to help her win,” the associate speculated. I suggested Fioretti lacks the capacity to do anything that subtle and is running as a desperate clutch at significance, like Ray Wardingly or Andy Martin.

Are we finished? Whew, I think I escaped with my job intact. I would have done much better opining on Police Supt. Eddie Johnson getting the boot for lying about his night of drinking, apparently at Ceres. It would have to be Ceres, wouldn’t it? What did my CBOT pals say about the place? The Bloody Marys are so strong you can read a newspaper through them. Squiffed or no, I appreciate you guys reading. We’ll save Johnson for another day.