We begin this morning with an oddity: a deal that appears to be happening.
Thanks to his fabled nose for a player and eye for a bargain, José Mourinho will give Borussia Dortmund £30m for 27-year-old Henrikh Mkhitaryan; Dortmund will immediately find a replacement equally as good at half the price and two-thirds of the age, while all over the internet, grown adults alter their Twitterh and Facebookh handles to incorporate a silent h.
Nor is that all. Playing Anthony Meyer to Real Madrid’s John Major, United continue to labour under the misapprehension that Paul Pogba is available to them. Their current bid stands at Infinity; his current interest stands at Limited.
Across Manchester, Pep Guardiola is ready to spring into action. Both he and Antonio Conte are linked with a move for James Rodríguez of Jorge Mendes – and Guardiola is also getting busy now that Spain have departed the Euros. Spooked by the manner in which they wowed the continent, he is eager to tie up a deal for Celta Vigo’s Nolito. As per his buyout clause, Nolito will cost £13.8m, and has, allegedly, picked City over Barcelona.
Talking of Barcelona, Arsenal will be wise to the news that Gonzalo Higuaín intends to leave Napoli at the end of his contract, while further east, West Ham face a struggle to hang on to Dimitri Payet, whose agent spent last week crowing about how much money it would take to sign him. And now, Massimo Moratti of Internazionale, flush with the romance of Chinese investment, would like to supply it. The expectation is that Payet, though fascinated by monarchy, discus and shopping centres, would like to play at San Siro.
Alas, at San Selhurst, the news is less hopeful. Earlier in the week, someone thought of the highest number they knew and offered it to Marseille for Michy Batshuayi, prompting much excitement; excitement about to be quashed by Chelsea. Like when the class weakling starts on someone two years below, they plan to flex their financial muscle and have the player for themselves; Palace will find solace in self-deprecating sarcasm and trigger Andros Townsend’s release clause.
Elsewhere, Leicester are in talks to sign Norwich’s Robbie Brady, apparently wowed by the manner in which he converted a simple header and penalty. Sunderland, West Brom and Hull City are also interested, but only Leicester can offer the Champions League football that his accomplishments demand.
